Your DC's Independent School

[LongHairedDrummer]

I am looking around primary schools for my DD for next september. She now goes to a lovely 'forest school' type nursery three days a week, and with a September birthday she will be among the eldest of her year group when she does go to primary.

I am feeling increasingly disillusioned with mainstream schooling. I've been to see 4 primary schools so far, and all have had kids learning phonics on screens, sat at desks for the majority of the day from as young as 5, all the core subjects taught the same, a heavy emphasis on academic achievement. 30 kids in a class, most of them sat in silence most of the time as teacher asks them things individually. It all seems so bland, repetitive and unisispiring, almost as if the purpose is to process them through the system knowing how to read, count and sit still for long periods of time.

I want somewhere where my DD can really thrive, develop her interests, experience a range of things, learn new practical skills, be inspired to learn, be encouraged to an active and healthy lifestyle, be part of a community. I don't want her on screens or being forced into a learning style that is easy for teachers but against her stage of development.

I have started looking at independent schools and would be grateful for any insights or recommendations from people whose DC go to one. (Or from people who are very happy with their mainstream school!). We could probably stretch to 2k-3k per term. A lot of the ones that I have seen are just rich person versions of the mainstream schools. I really love the Steiner schools, but there are none near and we would have to move location.

CofE small schools in where the Church still owns the property tend to survive. There is no benefit to local gov in flogging the assets and saves them having to put extra classrooms in schools in more built-up areas, and pay for bussing in.

Thanks everyone, this thread has been very helpful. I think I'll cast my net wider with state primary schools. Agree that we don't have a great budget for it, and to be honest I do wonder whether I wouldn't be better off spending that 9k a year on activities and holidays to benefit DD, instead of a private school. If we paid for a school we'd have almost nothing left for any other 'extras'.

With your budget likely being too tight for an independent, could you look at after school options that might tick all the right boxes for you? My DS went to a local state primary but did a couple afternoons at a Montessori school each week, from nursery to the end of y3. It was particularly useful for us in catching things that he needed a different approach to - he’s left handed and didn’t get a great deal of support for handwriting when it was demonstrated with the right hand to a class with 29 children using their right hand, but at the Montessori school there was plenty he did to make up for that. Likewise around 10% of kids just never quite click with phonics and Biff and Chip and need another strategy. He got that at Montessori and became a very strong reader through their methods. Likewise we are in a city but the Montessori had a forest school space and the children could come and go from indoors to outdoors at their decision, which seems like it might be your sort of philosophy. Worth a look at your local options, I think.

Also worth knowing Steiner schools really vary from one to another. Our local Steiner is very strict in families not having television, going to the cinema, or trips to somewhere like Peppa Pig land or a Disney park. They’ve asked families to leave over this sort of thing, and then we’ve met them at the Montessori school, which was way more chilled. (It’s still not a super TV/pop culture driven place, but you wouldn’t be thrown out for a Mickey Mouse t-shirt.) But some of them have specifically said they moved house and had previously been to a Steiner school elsewhere in the country and it was completely different. I do sometimes wonder if there are schools under the Steiner name but opened with the idea of wooden toys and keeping a garden and all the parts that sound quite idyllic without ever researching the entire Steiner rabbit hole. I would personally steer clear but obviously some people are happy there or they wouldn’t still be going!

Have you considered Quaker schools? They are highly sought after in the US (Obama's daughters both went to one in Washington DC) and I would look into it myself except there are none in London! Here's one south of Birmingham, maybe it's more of what you're looking for?

www.aquakereducation.co.uk/find-a-quaker-school/sibford-school/

I think you need to go and look at other schools.

Also, making statements that accuse teachers of making decisions about learning based on what is easy for them shows you have no clue.

I'm sorry if that how it came across, it was not my intention at all. I come from a family of teachers and I know for a fact how hard they work and how much they care, having watched my own mum up until 1 am marking books and planning lessons for most of my childhood.

I think more that teachers are heavily constrained by a curriculum and a more general school system that dictates what is taught, and how. This is a complaint that I have heard from teachers also.

Oh brilliant suggestion, I hadn't - thank you very much.

I understand OP. Sorry for my tetchiness. Teachers are tied by the ridiculous expectations of the curriculum.

Doing things that are easy for me is as far removed from my day to day experience as you can imagine.

Having said that, I believe I give my classes a brilliant education.

Look at a range of schools and don't dismiss those where children are sitting and listening. This is how much learning takes place.

Sibford might be out of your budget. It has a very good name locally.

If you're anywhere near Stratford, there is the Prep recently taken over by Arnold Lodge.

Or look at some of the smaller village schools? Eg Wilmcote only has 70 pupils in the whole school.

Be wary of very small schools from our experience our boys went to a primary with less than 10 in a year they ended up with much of the class being behind as their were so few children they couldn't work in groups together of a similar ability. There were 5 in the year 1 group - (two including us left at the beginning of year 2) it also resulted in very limited options of friends to play with and no options for sports teams for older years.

School has also since folded. It was a tiny independent.

https://inwoods.org.uk/

The Birmingham independent primary schools spend a lot of time prepping for the 11 plus exams.

@LongHairedDrummer, I really sympathise with your feelings here. My daughter also goes to a forest nursery (one of the ones affiliated with Liberty Woodland School, in fact) and we are deciding on her school for next year. Like you, I despair that most schooling in this country, state or private, is focused solely around a series of exams, and therefore education is not actually about the imparting of knowledge or a love of learning, but just about preparing children for arbitrary hurdles set by the state. In my home country teachers have far more discretion in terms of how they deliver the necessary curriculum and in how they evaluate students, and I really loved school. It saddens me that so many threads on MN say that it's only natural for children to hate school - it doesn't need to be this way! But it's frustrating that alternatives are only available to those with money. I wish you luck in finding the right setting for your child.

Independent Schools are very driven IMO .The one near us had DC from 3 doing maths at desks!

OP you also need to think about what you will do for secondary school. If you can't afford more than 3K per term then you won't be able to afford private secondary schools. Many people use state for primary in order to save up for private secondary.
IMO in England we do better with primary in the state sector than secondary and there are many brilliant state primary schools out there. Of course there are good state secondaries but it seems much more of a postcode lottery for those and certainly the state secondaries around here aren't good!

Steiner schools are based on a bonkers system of beliefs. Take great care if considering them that you subscribe to the whole game not just the superficially “ gentle education “.