The great transition: US 1st grade to UK Year 3

[nomadmummy]

We just returned rather suddenly from the US to the UK. Our experience with the US school system was awful all around (not interested in a debate, no offence intended). I have no experience with the UK system. So far my DS has told me he LOVES London, he loves is school, everyone is nice, etc. However he says that his elementary school in the US was too easy and he was bored but now he's finding that the curriculum here is 'too hard'. He was born mid-August so he's about the youngest. He's just turned 7 and started Year 3. I met his teacher briefly today and she said she's concerned but didn't want to discuss in front of other children (love her!) but we should have a meeting with the SEN coordinator.

I'm paranoid because in the US once 'special needs' comes into the conversation it's all about EXCLUSION and mums tell me here it's the opposite and about INCLUSION.

So I'm wondering if anyone has advice. He had a severe speech delay (I was adopted but this turns out to be common on birth father's side). Giftedness runs on both sides of the family. He is high sensitive from an emotional standpoint - in terms of how he repsonds and others. For example on the weekend he was screaming in the playground and in tears because he was trying to stop an older child from bullying a younger boy and she called him 'stupid'. He was outraged!

He often says he has trouble paying attention in class. However, he can concentrate on his iPad education games, drawing, reading, building... he has no problems concentrating on activities. He does have problems focusing when being spoken to a lot. I'm wondering if it's an auditory input thing? I have considered this many times - his speech therapist at times wouldn't stop talking and he'd have meltdowns.

Anyway, if anyone has advice for SEN discussion. And/or ideas for tutoring or workbooks and things I could get to help him. I'm worried my little perfectionist is just not engaging enough because he hate being wrong.

Thanks. Apologies for long windedness...I'm trying to hard to explain and stay awake!

It's also becoming more common for some summer born children, particularly August born children, to defer and start at just turned 5 rather than just turned 4. So it would not be unusual for an August born child to be in the year below their normal cohort.

So this is where it gets messy between curriculum standards and schools I suppose. Because in Grade 1 they were teaching multiplication. His school was a Blue Ribbon school and is one of the schools in the school district that people from all over the city try to get their kids into. As a solo mum I was paying $3875 / month in rent to live in the boundary making that his home school meaning he has to be allowed to go to that school. And they're so serious about academics they tried to get me to relocate him in Kindergarten because he was severely speech delayed. The information I have on first grade math curriculum from his school district and his progress report is very close to the Y2 curriculum. The goals for Grade 2 are close to Y3. Looking at his progress report to remind myself he started first grade struggling and then the by the end of the year he met or exceeded most in all areas except 'blending phenomes'.

And also I met with the assistant headmaster in the summer and they insisted they are accustomed to bridging the curriculum gap - and other parents have told me the same. I suppose I was hoping to find information on how to help him succeed...

So I say this for anyone reading - Holding your child back a year is a very bad idea. Again I saw the negative impacts on kids whose parents held them back because of the pandemic. And the gaps get worse. And I do not believe people should be trying to convince other parents to do so because they believe that worked for them. I have researched retention and holding children back because of changes in curriculum shows that retention may have short term benefits and is more harmful in the long run. In on study in the UK It was ranked 148/150 possible interventions.

But also there is research in the US that shows a disproportionate number of children are diagnosed ADHD and medicated who are the youngest in the class.

God, only on Mumsnet do you see obtuse advice like 'slip him into private school' as if that's all there is to it.

I really do wonder if some people ever pull their heads out of their arses.

Holding your child back isn’t the same as deferring them though op. You would be deferring a summer born child not holding him back to repeat year 2. He’s never done year 2 so he wouldn’t be held back but rather picking up where he left off curriculum wise. As an august baby he’d be a similar age to the other children too. He might not even be the oldest as many people defer summer borns nowadays

My dc went to primary schools in Australia and when my youngest come back to the UK she went in to year four and she was years behind. Coupled with the enormous move it was a difficult time for her.

She was on the 'bottom table' and was very aware of it and was going out for sessions with the TA often.

However because she is bright she did catch up eventually. On the things that matter. She doesn't know what a Roman is.

I got her a tutor, only for an hour a week which helped a lot. Ironically I'm a primary school teacher but I tried teaching her myself and it was a disaster.

I also made sure she had things going on out of school so that her whole world wasn't tied up with school.

I really would try not to worry, kids arriving from overseas will usually have catching up to do, I've seen kids arriving without even basic English who go onto pass exams with top grades just a few years later. It's still September, do meet with the school, no harm, but I'd also give it until later this school year to evaluate how easily he's catching up - but I would download the year 2 curriculum for you to see the gaps

I agree with others that it is not 'holding back' if he has only just started the year.

My sister was put into the lower year when moving overseas from the UK, it wasn't a good fit as she had been in school more than a year longer than her classmates, so after a few weeks she was put into the higher grade as the youngest instead. She didn't 'skip a year', it's just not always immediately clear which grade is the best fit with international moves.

Have you looked at the tests children do at the end of year 2 in the UK Op? Has your son tried to do one?

For an august baby from the USA I would have also thought starting in year 2 rather than year 3 would be preferable. It doesn't seem like he has covered the work needed to flourish in year 3, if he hasn't done the work at a more basic level (year 2) it's basically setting him up to fail in year 3.

I wouldn't be thinking he had any additional learning needs yet, his issues are more likely to be caused by the move.

I lived in the US and UK as a child and reckon US school is about 18 months behind the UK. Everyone I know who has moved US to UK, no matter how bright, had had quite a job catching up.

His lack of emotional regulation does not sound terribly unusual for a 7 year old who is experiencing culture shock and struggling at school. Frankly not being able to concentrate at school sometimes is normal too- especially if he is feeling anxious. Take the pressure off, drop him down a year. He is very young for his year anyway.

If you are looking for information on how to help him succeed:

Academically, either get a tutor or buy some of the workbooks or websites mentioned and do them with him every day if possible. A little bit of time every day is ideal

Culturally:
Try to get him into some clubs etc where he can interact without the pressure of school - beavers, sports, drama, dance. Whatever he's interested in.