Private school: what additional expenses should I prepare for?

[Epli]

We are considering sending our child to a private primary school. We are aware of the general tuition fees and fees for music tuition, but what other expenses we should prepare for?

Yes to lots and lots of themed dressing up

Be available for random trips to/ from sports or other events organised by the school....apparently.

Not a direct cost but could impact your work day / petrol / car costs.

It all sounds expensive, and not much fun.

V grateful not to be in London/SE any more and happy to settle for more relaxed mediocrity for me and mine 😁

Depends on the school. Some go at least one year ahead of national curriculum and state this on their website.
If you look at any A-level or GCSE results there are very few state schools on the top of the list.
Like NHS, state schools are NOT free for those who work and pay taxes and NI.
Good schools in London oversubscribed so very difficult to get into and people do not want to send children to bad schools if they have a choice.

Just came across this thread while our DD is getting ready to start school in September and though we have moved to a borough with good states, after visiting the privates it seems the difference is stark! As mentioned by someone previously we fall into the category of normal working middle class who will be making financial sacrifices big time to be able to send her to private primary. So just looking for reassurance that parents feel it is worth it in the end and they see a difference with the education but also overall development/ opportunities.

Sorry @ArchMum345 i don’t think it’s worth paying for prep. I wouldn’t do it if I could start over now. Avoid if you still can!

Depends what type of private school. Some low ball the fees and then charge you ££££ in extras. Some have more "all inclusive" fees where you will pay little to no extras, unless you decide to have something like music lessons.

They have tonnes of holiday so maybe add in extra clubs etc

Depends on the school.
Our school the fees include tuition, lunches, day trips, most after school clubs (one or two off site specialist ones cost extra), loan of instruments.

we pay extra for
residential trips (one annually cost this yr is £350 for yr3 child and £600 for yr7)
music lessons
judo kit (optional)
afterschool care if you need it (but the day included in fees is 08.00-17.00)

My bugbear is the uniform, not so much the usual uniform but the sports kit. Our dc have tracksuit, mid layer, rugby shirt, base layers, shorts, athletics polo shirt and shorts, house athletics top, cricket top and trousers - might be other things I’ve forgotten! Plus hockeY stick, tennis racket. I get it all second hand …

Aside from uniform the real extra cost is childcare in longer holidays.

Ours includes wrap around care ( 7.30am to 6pm but if they want tea it's an extra £3). DS had some issues and we were staggered to find speech therapy included in fees . Trips to.other schools for matches, competitions etc. included. There are excellent second hand uniform sales.

School trips, music lessons and visiting theatre groups etc. are extra. Also a couple of the more niche clubs are extra as they are run by visiting staff. For some bizarre reason we get charged for maths text books.. no other books just maths... no one seems able to explain why beyond " that's policy" but even the head isn't sure WHY that's policy!!

Ime absolutely not at primary age, especially if you're sacrificing things like extracurriculars, holidays, theatre trips and weekends away. All of which benefit the whole family and are educational in a much more broad sense. Different if the money doesn't feature for you, but to downgrade your lifestyle for prep, no.

Our primary (up to Y8) - lunches & prep (to 5:45pm) are included in the fee. We pay for gymnastics & music tuition - both external staff. We pay for trips but the educational day trips are no more expensive than free state school I work in. There are annual summer term residentials from Y4 - rather than just one in Y6. Ski & foreign language trips are biannual & in the holidays & not compulsory. Our school offers an in-school holiday club for the weeks the state schools are still at school and (as of this term) on Inset Days.

No one was forced to contribute to any teacher / TA gifts or attend any of the PTA events. We have a great 2nd hand uniform shop - I have purchased 2 x new designed sports tops, 4 pairs of hockey socks & 1 blazer new. Absolutely everything else was 2nd hand or the identical (but cheaper & unbranded) version from John Lewis or M&S. They will need mouth guards, hockey sticks, proper sports shoes.

You don't have tutor s- a lot of parents do but we figured that if you need a tutor to pass the secondary entrance exam then you're either going to be out of your depth or paying for more tutors to keep up. The school - particularly if it's a prep for a particular school, should be providing the education they need to succeed.

Secondary appeared to be cheaper but is actually more as they don't include the cost of lunches or transport in their baseline figure. The extra ed trips are also more expensive but tend to be in the holidays and DD1 hasn't had any compulsory ones - she's now in Y11. All her uniform was also 2nd hand bar hockey socks & a kit bag.

There's no need to try & keep with Jones - nice parents won't care & some of ours are so loaded we'd be bankrupt if we tried but never felt the need.

archmum345 it depends on why you are going private and what your state alternatives are.
Imo no need to go private before year 2 or 3. Before that you are pretty much teaching them to read yourself in any case.
We moved year 2/3 as the children were bored in their small multi year primary classes. Most effort went into raising the bottom third / quarter of the class (for whom provision was excellent). Those at the top of the class were left to their own devices. DS ' work was marked but he never made any corrections and the teacher didn't have time to chase him.
Music / art / sport / DT we're almost non existent. No sports teams etc.
We moved to private. Kids are no smarter but the curriculum is far broader and you get specialist teachers from yr 3-5. From yr 3 they play team sports which ours both enjoy. Standard of art, music and sport is 10 x better.
But I can only compare the schools we have attended and are available around us.
Someone will come along and say their local state primary is amazing and the local.prep.is dire...

Thank you @MissHavershamReturns @HerringBoneBlanket ! Our thought was that we are paying pretty much that amount for full time nursery annually. So it's not essentially a downgrade of lifestyle so to say but obviously compared to states it's quite a bit of money.

@Fudgeball123 exactly the reasons you mentioned and if I have to do it in couple of years I might as well do it now. The feedback from her nursery so far has been that she is on the brighter side compared to her peers (too early to say anything i think) but would like to give her the opportunities to push herself academically and extra curriculars.

@ArchMum345 I agree with above post that you want to know what you are getting for your money when you go private. I did from Reception and absolutely no regrets - my state primary options were far from dire but the focus would have gone on those at the bottom of the class. They have a phenomenal track record for raising the standards of those who come in unable to speak English but don't have separate groups to stretch the most able until Y3/4. This makes me feel like those who have achieved are left to it initially (and this was confirmed when I visited the school).

Where would that leave my DC who were both confidently reading by 3 and had completed all EYFS maths before they even started school? Other posters will come along and say that it is about developing social skills etc which I don't dispute for a second. But my DC had a drive to learn when leaving nursery and I was doubtful that drive would be as strong if they were left to their own devices for 2 years because they had met the majority of school academic objectives. Our school does not ignore the social side in favour of academic - they work on both.

We opted for a selective school so the range of abilities in the class is pretty narrow. The teachers move at a pace that all can keep up with and then provide extension work on the same topic for the most able. They have time for so much extra curricular in the school week - they have sports, music, drama, dance and LAMDA lessons all as part of their regular curriculum and all taught by specialist teachers. They also have specialist subject teachers for language, science, art. There is zero tolerance for poor behaviour or low level disruption and I can't even begin to describe how much this helps them achieve so much in a day. It is constantly reinforced into the children from Reception that they are in control of their future.

The majority opinion on MN is to save for secondary but I don't agree - I feel a solid foundation that embeds a drive to learn and progress goes so much further.

If you are in an affluent area with an exceptional state primary, it is likely you won't see a big change but in our case, private was definitely the right choice.

@ArchMum345 this is true when they're small but it quickly out strips childcare costs, plus you have to add in the increased shelling out for longer holidays and the associated care that goes with that.

We have several family friends who proceeded on this basis and who have found the snowballing costs very difficult. Plus they are in a "boiling the frog" situation with 2 families getting swept up in taking a step up to the more premier senior school options too.

For those of us with DC of at least equal academic drive and ability, who have taken the state options and whose children are doing at least as well, if not more happy due to shorter days, less pressure and the option to have a wider variety of experiences as no weekend school and excessive sport/study commitments and more free cash. It all looks a bit bonkers.

Clearly less of a dilemma if this is easy money for you and doesn't really impact. But for those I know who have sleepless nights, extra work and grandparents' financial input just to keep plates spinning, it really looks a bit mad. And the sliding doors moment was not just starting state primary in the first place.

Coming from a family that made these sacrifices for private school, not one of my siblings would argue it was worth it and not one of us has any intention to do the same for our dc. And we all went to different greater London school including ones that are popular enough to have whole threads on here.

Stationary, materials for ICT, Cooking, many Sports kits if good enough to get into sports teams, trips quite often including overseas. My dd went to Spain during summer break to study at Spanish college and stay with a Spanish student. They are still firm friends 15 years later.

Depends on the school. At our school all trips, food etc are included and most clubs are free. Group music sessions are also included up to a certain level. The only things besides to tuition is the uniform that's mandatory and lots and lots of people use the second hand shop (I'd say most) regardless of income level.

HerringBoneBlanket disagree re school outstripping childcare costs. We had a nanny to look after our two children which cost about £18k per year. We went state for years R-2/3 with part-time nanny and then paid about £9k per year each from years 3-5 and now it costs £16k per child per year in years 6-8 and then the senior day school will be cheaper at £15k per child per year.
So its all swings and roundabouts - depends what you earn and how much childcare you need?
A friend of mine in London gave up work to 'do the school run' at the state primary so that's a cost of £100k per year?
Our kids are at prep school / school transport from 7.30am til 7pm! So no need for childcare!

I wish our prep offered that level of wrap around. Nowhere near that!

Ours does 8:30-4:30 no extra cost. Then additional until 6:30.

Thank you so much for all the amazing feedback. Wondering if any of the mums here have children going in any of the Bromley (or around) privates? Could you please give me a shout or DM me?