Schools that offer bursaries at prep (single parent) - London and SE

[WinterSuny]

Seeking advice from wise Mumsnetters please..

Am a recently single parent to a DS whom is in Yr 1 at a good pre prep in SW London. His fees were paid by ex h and self. DS is v academic (working beyond expected level and on level 12 Oxford owl books)but also shy and can get very anxious in new situations/people.

There have been issues of DA with ex h - long story but involving coercive control. I have a lives with order for our DS

Essentially,ex h is likely to refuse to contribute to ds school fees going forward so I am hoping to fund his education going forward to a prep by bursary. I don’t expect to get 100% as earn above average. Have also considered moving to 11+ areas for grammar school exams

Any tips on which schools might be offering bursaries and would suit DS? I have been going through the good schools guide and individual school websites but am overwhelmed by it ! I don’t drive either so would need to live in an area with good public transport and town/city vibe.

thank you

You don’t specify but I assume you mean day schools? If you are considering boarding it’s worth looking at some of the Oxford boarding preps - though scholarships aren’t usually offered before year 5 or 6. Combined with a bursary that can cover 100% of fees. (And increasingly the minimum age for boarding is being raised so it wouldn’t be relevant to you for several years.)

If Ex H is his dad his earnings and assets will be taken into account for any bursaries whether he is prepared to pay fees or not unfortunately ☹️

@ModeWeasel In normal circumstances, yes. However if there has been police involvement or the coercive control cited in proceedings through a solicitor then a bursar would likely take this into consideration.

The bigger problem is that very few prep schools offer bursaries before Y3. They are often “tied” to a scholarship at this point too e.g. little Johnny is on the Arsenal youth squad, gets a sports scholarship and then has fees topped up with a bursary as needed.

I personally would consider great state options and move him straight away. Use your money to top up with tutoring as needed and aim for a grammar. That way you are not tied to fees and your ex has had another means of control removed from him. If he wants his child in a prep school then he pays half.

Alternatively, start saving for independent secondary over the next five years whilst you’re not paying fees. If he gets into a grammar then university fees are sorted or he has a deposit for a flat.

My brother was in a similar position with his ex. Honestly, moving the kids to state whilst they were young gave him instant relief from the financial pressure and having to beg his wife to pay her half (she literally made him get on his knees, but that’s a whole other story!!!)

Thanks all.

@BookwormButNoTime
i would be looking at a bursary from yr 3 onwards when ds moves to his next school- I can just about cover the fees until then if ex refuses to pay

@Somethingyesterday for now, day schools

I dont think many preps offer bursaries and if they do not until year 3/4.
I would move to an area with excellent state primaries and maybe then apply for bursaries or grammar for secondary.

@3WildOnes - not looking for bursary before y3.
But what you say is my plan even if he gets a bursary…don’t want to move him until he finishes at end of yr2.

You need to move your ds to a state school. Despite being 'very academic' he will be fine.

Hi OP. Depending on where you are in SW London you could look at the Berkshire / Surrey preps which run buses in and out of London. Lots do that for Yr 3/3/5 and then board later. Don't know about how bursaries are calculated but most offer scholarships with a small discount which then enable those who need financial assistance to apply for bursary on top.

@Legoninjago1 thank you - are you referring to Caldecott? Any others you know of?

Where does your current pre-prep feed to and what other relationships does your headteacher have? I’d be expecting your current school to help here and be making strong recommendations to you of where might suit and they should have knowledge of bursary situations too.

@DoThePropeller current pre prep is standalone but they are strongly associated with another all through school (which as far as I know has no bursaries at 7+ ) have a meeting with them early next term to discuss. I believe the school does have links with sw London preps but I am also considering moving elsewhere either in London or just outside to access grammars- preferably to a prep beforehand

I think Banstead Prep and Aberdour might offer bursaries in Y3, you could move out that way and be in the area for Sutton Grammar too.

@DoThePropeller good options but I haven’t heard good things about Banstead prep (bullying probs? ). Will look into Aberdour.

www.highgateschool.org.uk/bursaries/7-plus-bursaries/

Dulwich Prep London offers bursaries for entry in year 3 I believe.

Dulwich College Junior School also offers a few bursaries for entry into year 3 (though primarily for the senior school)

@WinterSuny I have sent u a PM

I have seen Eaton House school advertising bursaries on Nappy Valley Net. It sounds a great fit for an academic but shy child. I would check the websites of all commutable schools as most offer bursaries nowadays.

@SwiftSnail thank you. The websites talk about them being offered to children living in battersea or Belgravia but definitely worth a try!

I’d advise a degree of caution towards any school blatantly advertising bursaries for younger children - it can sometimes indicate a degree of financial desperation in a school. And there’ve been a few MN posters over the past decade who eagerly took up such bursaries, only to have the school collapse around them … (I do realise the schools mentioned above are well established names.)

Bursaries are generally offered once children are old enough to be able to demonstrate qualities that will enhance the school environment. (They don’t necessarily need to be scholarship level bright.) It’s not simply a matter of being kind to struggling parents.

I understand each school sets up their own policies. One example:
https://www.stpaulsschool.org.uk/admissions/bursaries-assistance-with-fees/

I have heard Whigift has many pupils on bursaries

https://www.whitgift.co.uk/admissions/fee-assistance

Though not sure if Whitgift is academic enough.

This school offers bursaries to boarding pupils https://www.christs-hospital.org.uk/admissions/scholarship/

@Lily7050 thanks! Maybe a better chance of being awarded a bursary at whitgift (and trinity) if the most academic children do not tend to apply?

Bursaries tend to be awarded to the most needy (prioritising those on the lowest income) rather than the most academic amongst those applying for a bursary. Whitgift is still in the top 50 independent schools in the country so I really wouldn't describe it as not academic. They take about the to 15% of the ability profile. You should keep in mind at most schools if your household income is more than £100k you typically won't qualify for a bursary at all.

I say this as the fact you are able to pay for prep fees on your own suggests you are still a relatively high earner.

You might be able to look into scholarships though for secondary which aren't means tested and at some schools can be 25% of the fees though increasingly the amounts are less.

I would try for a grammar school at secondary level. That way, the education will be excellent and there'll be no stress over fees.
There are plenty of good grammars in Kent. Maybe think about moving closer?

www.kent.gov.uk/__data/assets/pdf_file/0017/136205/Kent-grammar-schools-list.pdf

A list of the Kent grammars.