If you pay for private school does it seem reasonable to expect a better level of admin /organisation?

[NormaSnorks]

I have just returned from dropping my DS off at his new school, which is a private prep. It is a very good school, with a good reputation, we have lots of friends who are very happy etc, but to be honest, I was disappointed by my first impressions this morning.

Although we'd had some communication from the school (uniform lists etc) we didn't have any kind of 'formal welcome letter' telling us exactly where to turn up, who to report to, what to do with bags/ coats etc.
And in fact we hadn't really had a proper confirmation of his class, other than a telephone conversation with the Bursar in June.

Anyway we arrived this morning and it was chaos. We kept being told to do different things by different people (go straight to playground/ go to the cloakroom etc etc). When we managed to find his classroom/ peg we discovered that they had labelled everything with his 'proper' name, rather than the name which we had indicated very clearly on all the forms that he uses (e.g. Andy, rather than Andrew).

There are a few other niggly things too, like the fact that you have to pay for everything by cheque rather than on-line/ direct debit, and send 'notes' (not e-mails) to teachers/ the office etc.

I can't help but feel a bit pissed off, but don't know if I'm being a bit over sensitive. I kind of expected a high level of 'customer service' for parents at a private school? I sort of feel that part of the private sector thing is about supporting parents (especially those working) and making life easier.

If I have bad experiences in a shop or restaurant I always give feedback. I can't decide whether at some point in the future I should tell the school that I wasn't very impressed with first impressions?

I've just got back from a meet'n'greet at my eldest ds's Senior School and the Head Master was very entertaining in suggesting that as our children were strapping 11yo's, could we refrain from phoning the office until after 10am to see if they were ok. I snorted outloud and everyone looked at me.

Jura - I have the same problem as you..am going to put ds into uniform and put pe kit in bag.
I am also in need of reassurance that the late-stay clubs are happening this week since I am working tomorrow and friday, and am still uncertain as to whether dd is on the list for ballet or not (and if she is I need to get a list of ballet clothes/shoes and get them before first lesson). Arghh.

My kids were in state school before this one and I would say that in our short experience this school has had slightly better communication..but still ridiculously short notice for things like school trips (dd had a trip where they expected a parent to accompany all but 6 of the class and they told us the day before the trip..luckily she was one of the six but it was close), we have been requested to provide a costume for an assembly, request on Monday with assembly on Friday (by the time I'm home from work the shops are shut) - and the 'invitation' to watch the assemblies for both ds and dd were sent out the day before they were held. I'm not the only working mother there I'm sure, but it's really set up for those with a parent at home (or flexi-working nearby)

Ds joined this school at the summer half term and we had lots of visits/phone calls etc. Knew where to go with him etc (Agree with whoever said to speak to the school secretary - ours is fab and can sort out any problems)....but on his first day he was dressed in full uniform, only to find it was a PE day and all the rest of the first 3 years were in PE kit. He coped very well though (something to do with the cookies they are given at break time I think).

Hope you picked up a happy lad this pm Normasnorks!

Very coming for payment to be by cheque and notes to be wirtten, not email. I wouldn't expect the other to be standard anyway. It is possible to pay our fees by a DD scheme but this is done by an outside agencies and costs more than just paying by cheque.

This morning sounds chaos and nothing like we have experienced, either kast year (PP1) or this year. I wouldn't be happy with what you describe, no. And yes, when things have settle ddown I do think it is fair to comment on how you felt disappointed withthe arrangements and why - may help them in the future.

You may find you have a Parent Form Rep who can feed back such issues to a school discussion group later in the term. He/she may be able to clarify how things work normally and what to expect. ds joined part way up the school and so much was assumed that we would already know.

OK - quick update, as I can't stand it when people don't return to their threads!

He was fine at home time - came out all smiles and chatty. Apparently his teacher was late this morning (stuck in traffic ) which may account a little for some of the chaos.

I asked him about the name thing, and he said "well this morning Mrs X was calling me 'Andy' so at break time I had a quiet word with her, and after that she got it right..."
It made me smirk to think about the 'quiet word' (he's 5 ) - clearly something I've said at some point in the past has 'gone in' somewhere, as I've always told him that if anything is making him unhappy at school to tell me, or have a 'quiet word' with the teacher when the other children aren't around!

Anyway, we got the parent communication book home tonight too, so I'm going to scribble a note about the name thing and leave any other comments until a more appropriate time!

good news normasnorks. He sounds a lovely character, and I'm sure if he continues to have 'quiet words' with the teacher when things aren't as he wants them he'll have a cracking school career.

• I feel a bit stupid for having worried now! He seems to have grown up over the summer - I said something to him earlier and he just rolled his eyes and said " Mummy...... don't forget I'm in Year 1 now...." !

It's our job to worry. If we don't who will? I'm still chortling over the 'quiet words' btw . I'm sure neither of mine would have had that confidence at that age.

The "quiet word" with the teacher is great. Love that one. Think I'll tell dd that's teh way to proceed.

Glad he had a good day.

But I was a bit (sorry) at the implication that because you're paying you get better admin. It shouldn't make the slightest bit of difference IMO.

My boys go to a big state comprehensive and the admin/pastoral care for new boys is superb.

I notify the school about appointments, etc via e-mail and have been thanked by the school for doing it this way. (Easier for me than writing a note and a guarantee that it ends up in the right place rather than rotting at the bottom of the bag!) The admin staff have clearly defined roles, and e-mails get checked regularly. All staff have their own e-mail address and I can communicate with them this way if I want to - or via their individual telephone number, or in the Homework planner/by note if I want to.

I don't think I meant 'better than state school' in the way you've interpreted it - I meant better than I experienced! His last school (a state primary) was fantastically well organised - used parentmail/ e-mail/ website up to date/ etc etc and I'm finding the 'old-fashioned' ways of this prep school very frustrating. It'll just take time.

Everything was fine this morning BTW

Oh well...DD's school is so well organised they send out term dates about 2 years ahead. We had it pinned to board in home office and copied date of start of term - Sept 5th - onto calendar.

Never thought to double check on later lists of dates and events so were blissfully unaware that about a year ago they decided to start this term on Sept 4th till we turned up this morning

We weren't the only ones caught out... I guess in business a change of meeting time or date is always proactively communicated. Bit annoyed cos DD might have missed out on a club she wanted to do with limited places.

Still, yesterday was a lovely sunny day in the garden so what the heck.

Blimey that is terrible

Dd is going to state school (after much umming and ahhing about which was right for her argh). Yesterday her form teacher and teaching assistant came round for an HOUR, had tea and cake, played with her, discussed with me exactly what would be happening for the first couple of weeks and what would be expected of us, where we should drop off and pick up, how we should communicate stuff to them (no emails either!) and then answered the billion qs dh and I had.

And we don't even pay them!
amazing....

CD - I think he's been a bit neglected to be honest, for two reasons:

1. He's joining at an 'odd time' (no excuse, I know) into an existing Year 1 class and
2. His teacher is new to the school too.

Either way, though, I was disappointed, and will in due course make some suggestions about how 'new' children into existing classes are welcomed.

What the staff seem to be lacking the children seem to be making up for though. Yesterday he had lots of little girls from his class fussing over him at home time, and this morning a little boy from his class came marching up to him and said 'Do you want to come and play?' which was so sweet.

Its very disappointing when our LOs have a bad time, so I hope things are improving for your son NormaSnorks (great name BTW) and it sounds like he will do just fine, he obviously has great initiative. My DS had a miserable first day too, like yours he was the only new one (yr 4) not standard intake and his guardian just deserted him! Spent the entire am break wandering around by himself (no drink or snack, he didnt know where to go) and again at lunch time. Said no one played with him or spoke to him . He was so upset and also 'had a quiet word' with the teacher after lunch. I went in and spoke to his teacher today before school started so hopefully he will have a much better day. Can tell you though, I was heartbroken yesterday to learn how his day had been.

Normastorks - the children in your DS's class sound lovely - and I'm sure, as you say, it's because he's not joining at the main entry point. My DD also joined a new school this Sept (Y4), not the usual intake, and it was ok - she seems to have met some very friendly kids - but the reception lady still told us to go into the playground where there would be a list with her class on (and classmates) waiting. No-one was there, as they'd all gone up to the class already! Not the best start - but it was quickly remedied as the reception lady then took her up to the class. I felt for my DD but she seemed to be less worried by it than I was! Good luck anyway - schools are always a bit more chaotic in the first week of the year. I'm sure things will improve