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Education

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Original poster

Anyone home educating - ie NOT sending kids to school

61 replies

PotPourri · 10/07/2004 14:41

DH didn't go to school til he was 14, and at his own choice. I went the full way through. He's definately got a more rounded view of the world and learns from his surroundings and books etc much more effectively than I do (and I'm a very high achiever as it happens). I learn to pass an exam, or to meet a deadline, or in preparation for a presentation. And it just doesn't stick.

We're expecting our first little 'un and I'm wondering if anyone could share success/less successful stories about home educating. I would love to have the courage to do it, but it's so different from what I know...

OP posts:

spacemonkey · 10/07/2004 14:45

I am about to take my dd out of school to home educate her (she is 13). I thought about doing it when my children were little, but didn't feel I could cope with home edding primary age children (i'm not noted for my patience )

Have a look at education otherwise for useful info. It doesn't cost much to join and your membership pack includes an extensive contacts list - all the people i've made contact with have been extremely friendly and helpful

also there is a home ed mailing list which is useful - see this site for details

stupidgirl home eds her children but i haven't seen her on mn for AGES - anyone know where she is?

HTH

NomDePlume · 10/07/2004 14:47

Hi PP, I'm not a HE (home ed'er) but there are quite a few on here who are so I;m sure you'll get lots of advice.

Whilst I can see how a HE child could get a better standard of education at home I'm a firm beleiver that school is not just about academics, the social side has an equal part to play in my view. That's the main reason that I don't and won't HE. Plus the fact that I'm not confident that I could cover all subjects in a sufficently knowledgeable way (and I'm not unintelligent).

frogs · 10/07/2004 14:51

I wondered what you were doing for 2ndary, spacemonkey, following your primary schools thread.

Is that because you can't find a decent school, or because it's the best solution for your dd? (sorry for hijack)

spacemonkey · 10/07/2004 14:51

the social aspect is the thing that worries people most

imo school does not provide a "normal" social environment (lumped together with a bunch of people the same age as you - when in your adult life will that happen again?!)

if you are home edding you do have to make particular effort to provide social opportunities for the children - the home edders i have been in touch with have said it's not nearly as difficult as most people fear. HE children tend to mix with a wider variety of people of different age groups and, from what I've heard, develop better social skills than your average school educated child

it is a hotly debated topic though

spacemonkey · 10/07/2004 14:53

a bit of both frogs - the london secondary schools situation was what made me revisit the idea, and now i've thought through the various options i am convinced it is the best solution for my dd

Original poster

PotPourri · 10/07/2004 15:06

Thanks for the link spacemonkey. It looks like a wealth of information. Good luck with your change to home schooling...!

OP posts:

spacemonkey · 10/07/2004 16:02

thanks PP, good luck to you too!

one of the best things about HE is that you don't have to follow the national curriculum - it only applies to schools

Jimjams · 10/07/2004 17:08

Ds1 is autistic and 5- currently at school part time (mainstream) and has a part time home programme. For us school is never a permanent idea- we'll stay there for so long as it works. Our second choice would probably be home education. At the moment my son cannot do anything independently so unless we win the lottery and can afford to employ a team home ed isn't going to happen full time. However I am a member of several home edding email lists.

For him I think he can get a better social curriculum outside school. Currently there are who weeks when he doesn't access the classroom at all, and his interaction with peers is limited. Next term the school want to get some older children to play with him in a structured way, but his opportunities to practice real life situations are always limited. For example his LSA wanted to take him to some shops next term but insurance won't allow it. Instead we're going to get together and do it over the summer.

Luckily his LSA is excellent so he does learn, but a lot of the reasons I send him to school are to do with respite for me.

I cannot see mainstream school working for him at secondary level (and I'm not convinced about upper primary). If we do not get a place at a decent special school we may well home ed anyway. (also I'm a bit wary about "trying out" special school as once they're in you need the LEA's permission to remove them to home ed, which isn't the case for mainstream, you can just do it.

I don't have the address but google muddlepuddle- home ed can start in the pre-school years

HiddenSpirit · 10/07/2004 20:25

Sorry to off topic.....

Jimjams, have you visited any of the special schools here? Just asking as we viewed Milford back in June and are due to visit Downham on Thursday. This is for DD to start in September.

Just wondered if you had viewed these and had written them off for some reason?

lars · 10/07/2004 20:36

Just to add it is something I have considered but with working part time it is very difficult, as i do need to work.
I just feel totally let down by the system. larsxx

Jimjams · 10/07/2004 21:18

We weren't allowed to HiddenSpirit! DS1 is "coping" in mainstream and therefore not Special shcool material- according to the Ed Psych. Inclusion inclusion inclusion I hear VERY good things about Downham, and the teachers I have met from there seem very good (there were a few on our PECS course). If we ever get a chance of special school we'll ask to look at Downham and Longcause, although I think Longcause maybe more suitable for Aspies (not sure though).

HiddenSpirit · 10/07/2004 23:23

Jimjams, I just read your post to DP and he said "that's f**ng awful" which I agree with (unless you are happy with how he is getting on in mainstream that is) as we feel that DD is nowhere near ready for mainstream. She, like your DS1 is non-verbal, although she is improving single word vocab, she is still unclear on most of the words she does know (funnily enough "no" is very clear ) and is mod/severe learning difficulties. This coupled with the fact she has no (or very little) sense of danger led our Ed Psych to recommend Special School and got the ball rolling on her being statemented.

Out of curiousity, who is your Ed Psych? Ours is Jeff (couldn't tell you his last name though lol) and apart from forgetting to see DD in January he has been pretty good.

Jimjams · 11/07/2004 00:36

I think we could probably have pushed it if we had really wanted to. I wanted him to have full time one to one and thought that the best way to guarantee that was in mainstream (which has happened). The school are very good- and we were happy to give it a go there- also liked the idea of mainstream role models, although he's never copied another child in his life so not too sure they're that useful for him. The problem with him is that his problems boil down to lack of language. Even his private SALT (who knows him very well and tends to be very honest- no false platitudes- she's great) said last week if he can get language then he'll be fine. So we're happy to wait and see a bit longer. If language kicks in then he may well manage primary mainstream, if it doesn't then I think probably Downham would be our best bet.

Jimjams · 11/07/2004 00:37

By "fine" I mean able to live an independent/semi-independent life- jobs etc become a possibility- he won't be NT obviously.

KatieMac · 11/07/2004 00:48

I have recently become facinated in Home Educating and I'm looking forward to looking at those links. As a childminder I am working with children already and have become increasingly concerned with my DD's (6y) education at school.

So lots of research to come

spacemonkey · 11/07/2004 01:23

for anyone interested in home educating, John Holt is essential reading, including:

How Children Learn
How Children Fail
Instead of Education
The Underachieving School
Learning all the Time

all available from amazon I would think

Yorkiegirl · 11/07/2004 01:27

Message withdrawn

boudicca · 11/07/2004 01:51

I'm seriously considering it for dd3,who's 15,I have begun to think that maybe I've been programmed to believe that her being in school is best-but I'm now wondering if thats just a cop out because I would have to be with her more and endure the 'hormonal strops',(also thinking strops wouldn't be quite so horrible if she wasn't being sent to a place she hates every day!)

spacemonkey · 11/07/2004 01:59

boudicca, i know what you mean (about the strops)

although my dd won't actually start home ed officially until the autumn, i have effectively taken her out of school now (she had been ill with suspected glandular fever anyway) and have already noticed an improvement in her attitude and general mood. My relationship with her is far better and her interest in things is starting to return.

She's always loved drawing and artistic activities, and even that had been waning (she claimed she didn't like her art teacher at school), but since she's been at home she has started to draw again and is producing artwork on the computer.

spacemonkey · 11/07/2004 02:03

here is the John Holt website Growing Without Schooling

boudicca · 11/07/2004 02:03

I know what you mean,if dd3 is off school she tends to be far more relaxed and is always reading or sometimes writing stories on the computer,her latest is really good too!
I seem to be getting nearer and nearer 'The Decision'

boudicca · 11/07/2004 02:07

I don't really know whats holding me back,except that I'd decided to try and re-train to make myself more useful,
spacemonkey,did you take a long time to decide or was it so obviously the right choice that it made itself ?

spacemonkey · 11/07/2004 02:12

I know it seems such a radical thing to do, but I am amazed at how comfortable I feel with The Decision now that I have made it. I think it is much easier to take a teenager out of school than a younger child - as I said below, I don't think I could've coped with home edding my children at primary age. But a teenager can take a large part of the responsibility themselves, and will be much more aware of what paths they want to follow in terms of learning.

My dd wants to take her GCSEs, so we will be using the GCSE syllabuses for each subject as a basis for her to work from. She is going to concentrate on the subjects she enjoys, initially at least, including art, photography, french and italian. I can coach her for the languages (along with my mum who speaks Italian quite well and has offered educational language holidays) and a good friend who is a secondary art teacher has offered coaching and tuition for art and photography. We also intend to cover IT, English and Maths.

Do join education otherwise and the home ed mailing lists to make contact with families already home edding - it's very reassuring to hear their stories.

Whereabouts are you by the way boudicca?

spacemonkey · 11/07/2004 02:14

It was a decision that had been brewing for many years waiting to be made, but once the situation came up this year (i.e. dd becoming increasingly unhappy at school and our imminent move to london) the decision made itself really!

spacemonkey · 11/07/2004 02:16

PS I can't see why you shouldn't still be able to pursue your own plans alongside home ed for your dd boudicca - I guess it depends on the time commitment involved?

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