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Original poster

Opinions on this new service at school please

44 replies

nutcracker · 21/01/2007 11:53

Dd's have come home with this letter

'Occasionally children come into school upset because of something that is happening in their lives. Things like a pet dying, or a close family member ill, or in hospital. We want to offer the children in both key stages the oppurtunity to discuss these worries before coming into school.

We are opening a 'Drop-In' time in the dinning room from 8:30-8:50 am every morning to help children make a good positive start to the day.

Our pastoral staff will listen and respond to the childrens concerns and needs. We will pass on to the staff if the children need further support and if you, as parents need to be involved we will contact you.'

Can't decide what I think about this really. Does anyone else have a school that offers this ?

OP posts:
McDreamy · 21/01/2007 11:54

My initial reaction is

Isn't that our job as parents?

Is this primary or secondary?

Original poster
nutcracker · 21/01/2007 11:56

Primary

Tbh I just don't think it will work that well. Plus if kids want to go in without their parents knowing how will they do that at that time of the morning ?
If one of mine suddenly dissapeared off to the drop in centre then i'd know as I stand in the playground until they go in.

I think it's a nice idea but just not very workable.

OP posts:
evamum · 21/01/2007 11:57

Seems a good idea but I dont know if I like this bit
'and if you, as parents need to be involved we will contact you.'

Seems a bit worrying that they wouldnt contact you anyway, or you wouldnt know about it....how old are your dd's? is this high school?

lulumama · 21/01/2007 11:57

some children cannot talk to their parents,,and if something has happened that has upset the parents, then it is good for an 'outsider' to be available for the child to talk to IMO....

evamum · 21/01/2007 11:58

xposts.

If it is primary then I would not be happy. secondary school maybe, but primary kids should be coming to you first for these things that they may not fully understand (illness, death etc)

McDreamy · 21/01/2007 11:59

I think it#s really sad that some primary school children would have issues that they couldn't talk to their parents about. I would be be really upset to find that out, but my children are very small so maybe I am being a little niave (SP!) and have all this to come

AudreyForbesHamilton · 21/01/2007 12:00

Who are the pastoral staff?
I think it sounds great if they are trained counsellors, not so great if it is the school secretary doing a bit of overtime.

colditz · 21/01/2007 12:03

I know kids whose parents don't even get up to see then to school. Everyone knows, everyone important knows, but they are 8 and 6 and considered capable

They would definatly benefit from something like this

McDreamy · 21/01/2007 12:04

Yep I can see that Colditz very shocked to hear it though - how sad

Original poster
nutcracker · 21/01/2007 12:07

Not sure who the pastoral staff are but I think it may be some of the teaching assistants, pretty sure it won't be counsellors.

I suppose if it even helps one person then it is worth it yes. I agree though that at primrary age it is sad if they feel the need to use it rather than speak to their parents.

Would be gutted if one of mine went and I knew nothing about what the problem was, although thankfully I think thats unlikely.

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WigWamBam · 21/01/2007 12:10

Dd's school has a trained children's mentor who is a qualified counsellor. She generally acts as a mediator and deals with issues like bullying, playground teasing, or misunderstandings with other children or teachers, but can offer a sympathetic ear and practical solutions to almost any problem a child has. She keeps an eye on their physical and emotional well-being in school, and if she has any concerns or if the child raises concerns, she will see the parents about it.

The parents don't always need to be involved though; playground squabbles and so on are easily solved without involving parents. Plus parents can ask to see the children's mentor as well if they have any concerns that she could help with.

I'm delighted that there's someone dd can go to if she needs to - I can't be there to help her all the time and neither can her teacher, but the mentor is always available. Plus, sadly, not every child has parents who are willing or able to listen to them and something like this could be of real value to them.

Fillyjonk · 21/01/2007 12:13

I think its great, though if they want to keep it confidential it might be better to have it at lunchtime.

Yes it would be fantastic if our kids always felt they could come to us first. But they don't. For lots of reasons. Sometimes we are being crap. Sometimes they just click really well with another adult. Sometimes they need another perspective.

This service doesn't stop kids from going to their parents though...it just means that they have the option of talking to someone else.

I do think that even primary age kids deserve confidentiality and I hope they are respecting that.

hercules1 · 21/01/2007 12:15

It is a great idea in principal however you need to know who is doing the drop in. Also I am not sure about the legal side of this with regards to confidentiality as these children are under 13. If I were you I'd really want to find out these two things.

hercules1 · 21/01/2007 12:16

Nothing can be confidential if they are concerned the child is at risk from others or from themselves. The more I think about this the more concerned I am. It has to be done properly.

Fillyjonk · 21/01/2007 12:20

I do agree it must be done properly, not in some cack handed amateurish way

and yes I know there are child protection issues (I thought it was for under 16s, no?) but if we are talking about little things-x took my lunchbox so I kicked her and now we are not friends...I just think that should be kept private, not repeated.

Out of interest, does anyone know how childline handles child protection?

evamum · 21/01/2007 13:19

Childline policy is

'ChildLine has a policy of confidentiality. ChildLine counsellors will not pass on any information about a caller to anyone else and all conversations are private. ChildLine will only break confidentiality if the young person or someone else they talk about is in a life-threatening situation.'

but ...they are trained counsellors.

I would agree that for childhood squabbles this is a great idea, but the fact they mention in the letter what I think are quite serious issues I would want to know exactly what training and confidentiality policies are in place.

Fillyjonk · 21/01/2007 13:23

yes, I do feel strongly that if adults are going to do any actual counselling of kids then they should be trained. And I don't mean a weekend course.

OTOH am re-reading the OP and wondering if maybe its just a chance for the teachers to chat with the kids or summat?

I am actually really unclear about what they are offering

IMO

trained counsellors operating as confidentially as possible within a school = good

The school janitor who has done a day course at the local tech in "Talking About Your Feelings" = not so good

But also-the service will be useless for picking up on serious issues if the kids know its not confidential. Which they will, if what they say gets fed back to parents evening.

DominiConnor · 21/01/2007 13:31

We've worked on our kids to help them articulate emotional situations. Not big stuff usually, but things that are big to them.

Don't believe for one second that we're got all the way there. If a trained person wants to help, seems to be good.

Celia2 · 21/01/2007 14:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

juuule · 21/01/2007 15:17

"if you, as parents need to be involved we will contact you.'
Who appointed them god that they can decide whether to involve me or not in my children's lives? When did school become the parent?

Fillyjonk · 21/01/2007 15:20

DC-good post

cat64 · 21/01/2007 15:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CODNoMore · 21/01/2007 15:25

whats wrong wiht it nutty?
tis pr obt o free up calss teacher time

pianist · 21/01/2007 15:30

I think a lot of schools are running this kind of service - it is called 'Talk time' at our school. It's not before school, so I'm not sure parents would know the kids were using it. It's mainly friendship issues they want to discuss, but it's so popular you might have to wait a week or two to get an appointment!

Original poster
nutcracker · 21/01/2007 15:33

Oh no I don't think there is anything wrong with it, more that I am not sure it will work, well not at that time of day anyway.

I mean say a child does have a problem, and they walk into playground with mum or dad, they aren't then gonna say to mum/dad 'ok bye, am just of to talk about my problems at the drop in centre', are they.

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