Why has the whole school thing turned me into a judgemental maniac? It's costing me a fortune in wine!!!

[ediemay]

Moved here because we liked the area, close to work etc and has a good, friendly local school. So, now that reality is looming (LEA deadlines for reception intake in 2007) why have I become a crazed, drooling halfwit who feels the need to visit every school in the county and worry endlessly about the whole effing thing??? The only thing keeping me sane is WINE. So - do I choose good, friendly local school or ten minutes' drive away school with better academic achievement?AAAAAAUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Have you got a spare £6000?

Is it actually a better school? Or is the intake slightly different? You need to think how well YOUR child will do at the school, not how well other people's children do.

Scummy, that's so true about DD1.

thanks Scummy, MI etc.

am interested in your view Scummy as I know you would go for a green option usually. we could afford an electric car I guess. One of the lovely things about moving from Manchester to Devon was selling our second car as we barely need a car here (and needed two for work/nursery runs in Manchester). so am not really keen to get a second car again

been to look at little village school again. it's friendly. jolly. and lacking all the sports, drama, music, swimming pool, nature reserve, composting centre, wicker constructions, and general fantastic academic and eco-consciousness of the bigger school they're at now.

DP is doing his bit to help, he has volunteered to sleep with the very sexy Emma who's the school cycling liaison expert for the local council, in the hope she'll organise a safe crossing point across the killer road junction.

btw Scummy, there are pavements and quiet roads all the way to the school they're at from our house, apart from one horrific junction. it's a major roundabout where the traffic pours across from the only motorway into Devon and Cornwall, and off into Exeter. so it gets very fast traffic indeed, businessmen racing in fast cars to get to work and back, etc. it needs a bridge or a crossing put in. the rest of the journey is ok by bike.

ps Scummy am considering a brand new bike after our discussion on that other thread. to cope with the hills round here!

My dd has started school this week and our local school has an excellent ofsted report - however, I've really realised this week that the most important thing is how you and your child feel when you leave them there every day...and so would rate a small, good, friendly school far higher than anything else. If they don't quite come up to scratch on the academic front I would far rather put in a couple of extra hours helping her with things or doing our own little projects than send her to somewhere that doesn't feel quite as warm and friendly. I also think that being able to walk to and from school with all her friends is really important - it's nice to be able to go and play with people locally after school too. Good luck with your decision.

Hi all, thanks so much for all of this. Fennel, the eco school sounds fantastic and it's so good of your DP to be so self-sacrificing......Good luck with all of that. Is car sharing an option?
DS has started at the local school's nursery so it's a great opportunity to see how he gets on. Once he starts to make friends there it will probably be in the bag. I'm going to see the other 2 next week and have calmed down a bit, although wine intake has remained constant. Thanks to all for the wise words.

Hi ella, I agree about playing locally after school - if I go for one of the other schools we will always be driving and I'd love him to have local friends. Your school sounds lovely, I hope your DD has enjoyed her first week

Consistency is always the key with wine intake, i find, Ella.

Isn't your dp the virtuous one, fennel?! I think a mild eco friendly slap is in order, together with his agreement (if finances are joint) that you get to buy the best bike on the market to compensate for the thought even crossing his mind when he has the gorgeous you as his helpmeet. It does sound like the kids are settling into a rather lovely school already and that it would be a big shame to move at this point to me. As I said before, I really think that in your particular situation there is a very good reason not to automatically go for the local school. Maybe you should go with lobbying the council and driving for now but review the situation every once in a while if there are no changes forthcoming on the roadfront and separate classes become a possibility.

Very impressed at the pavements. Have bored/angered countless friends/aquaintances with my theory that rural folk clearly don't value the vulnerable in their communities (disabled, ill, elderly, children etc) because if they did they would lay on good public transport and pavements so that getting out and about without a car was possible. I will have to change my tune now.

Ediemay, as you say, trying out the local school nursery will probably give you a much clearer picture of how you feel about the school

I have made a decision, I asked the girls what they thought about moving to the local school. and they were quite definite, they'd like to move to the school they can walk to. and were especially keen at the thought they could walk there on their own in a couple of years. I know they are too young to understand all the implications, but they do know what it's like to change school and I was gutted they might have to do that again, but they are gung-ho about it. And very clear that walking to school would be better than going by car to their current school. I think they're right, other people might be ok with the car commute, but we'd just feel miserable every day, driving past the local school and children walking, knowing that for the next 6 years (9 if dd3 went too) it would be a car commute twice a day.

DP isn't quite convinced, he's determined to continue working for a crossing point on the big road. with Emma to help, naturally.