Son age 4 too early for school. Please help me.

[alisonrose]

I am becoming increasingly frustrated with the primary school admissions criteria in this country. My son is an August baby and will be due to start school 2008. I DO NOT want him to start at age four. I see friends who have had their summer boys start school and they have struggled and some have continued to play "catch up" well into secondary education. The head teacher is sympathetic but has told me that the LEA will not allow him to start in reception at age 5 and he will be expected to go straight in to Year 1. I have read books and articles on this subject and it has made me even more determined to delay him. The LEA do offer to let him start later in the year ie January or after Easter but what is the point in that? He misses chunks of his first year and arrives into an already established year group Where do I go from here? I'm at my wits end with this. The only option I see is to try the private sector. Do I write to my MP? Do I set a legal challenge?!!! Please help.

How odd I am actually in the opposite situation to you, my dd is a sept baby and I think she is really ready to start school this september, however she will have to wait until she is nearly 5 which I was worried about.

I think having read this maybe I shouldn't worry

Alisonrose there are examples of parents who have successfully argued to have their child start a year later and in Reception (I agree there's no point holding back for a year and then statrting in yr 1). I know someone who did this, but her dd is developmentally delayed and needs extra help etc as well as being an August child so they had a good case. AFAIK it's down the the particular school.
FWIW you may find yr ds is ready enough in 2 yrs' time. My dd is 5 in June and started last Sept, she is in a class of summer babies and they do seem to have settled very well. I would warn against holding him back for a term; there is a child in DD's class who only started in Jan but he was on his own and I think has found it harder to fit in with the social groups IYSWIM.
Can you try to negotiate half days for him, even just for the first half term? At least then he would be at school, meeting other children etc, without the long, tiring day.
Readign the thread a lot of people seem to be saying the same thing. Hope it's helping!

I am with you CD, DD will be 3 in a couple weeks, and I'd send her to school now if I could. She's bored at home. I'm convinced of it. She's loves going to the creche when we go shopping, and sunday school at church, etc. And she's really into collecting friends and seeing them often. Socialite in the making I think [scared emoticon needed].

My ds has been backyeared as he did not cope with school when he started at just 4 but he has SN and I doubt very much that the LEA would agree to backyear a child for any other reason - it was hard enough to get mine to agree to do it for ds. I agree with what a lot of the others have said - 2008 is a while away yet and your ds may surprise you. Most reception children start on a part-time basis to ease them into school anyway. Although my ds struggled my dd could have coped with starting school the year before she did (she's a november baby). My mum is a reception teacher and says that generally by the time the children go into year 1 the younger ones have caught up.

DD is a summer baby and started after Xmas - Reception was fine for her and she is ahead of some of the kids that started earlier in the year - I would say to send him - it is a long way off - give him help with stuff before he starts school though - reception is not a lot different to nursery - with DD the shock came starting year 1 - no playing in class and no extra playtime - Reception is far easier and prepares them for year 1 - without it I would say going straight into year 1 would be a huge shock!!

Same here Alisonrose - ds3 will start in Sept 2008 aged just 4 and a few days!! Tbh, I'm not worrying about it - they change such a lot between now and when they are 4. I think it could also be an advantage to him that he's got older siblings. Ds3 has older brothers (obviously) and is already coming on much quicker than they did.

My brother was an end of August birthday and did well in school too. It's not always a problem so if you want him to go to the school just go with it and see how he gets on.

My ds started in Reception last September (mornings only) - he is a July baby. I was worried how he would settle - felt he would cope with the work but was immature. He has actually been fine - in fact he has matured quite a bit since starting and I think he was ready to start and some of the behavioural issues we had last year may have been down to boredom.....

If the school is following the national curriculam, the emphasis will be on play and learning through play at this stage. I wouldn't decide at this stage that he won't be ready - as others have said, he will change a lot over the next 18 months. I asked a very experienced reception teacher a few years ago if she felt that summer born children were at a disadvantage by being in the youngest half of the class - she felt that it made no difference to their ability to learn, that is individual to the child, but there was a difference in their maturity levels. But any good teacher will know this and work around it.

ha-ha, here they start the children in school for 1 afernoon, just after easter a week the september before they are to start reception.
So some children will still be 3 years old!!! I know of one mum who is a bit woried as her daughter isn't fully potty trained.
O well, what a country, not potty trained but lets start them in school.

Thought I might try to give a reception teacher's perspective having been one for 4 years until DS arrived 7 months ago.

The ethos of my class was all about developing as a person, making friends and feeling secure far more than anything to do with education. The government have recently been coming around to this way of thinking - a huge majority of the 'work' in Reception classrooms is what the children see as play. For example, building with Lego with a friend develops social skills, loigcal thought, motor skills... (the list is endless!) I'm not sure that home schooling can achieve this in the same way but a nursery may?
I suggest you take a look at the Foundation Stage Curriculum online at \link{http://www.qca.org.uk/163.html} (hope that worked!) or ask for a copy of the profile booklet from your local school.
Hope this helps!:)
FWIW, my school operated a scheme of allowing summer-born children to attend a morning a week at first, building up to every morning then full days in the term before their 5th birthday.

Because of our moving house and a change in counties/admissions policies ds1 (July birthday) started school in the September after his 5th birthday, into a yr1 class who had all done a year in reception already.

It wasn't planned, but actually I believe it was the best thing for him. Academically he has done superbly - so no problems there. (He's 8.5 now btw). But I think he would have struggled with the emphasis on conformity and rules which is required in reception.

So it is an option.

I agree I'd wait until nearer the time. Also it depends on lot (IMO) on how the Reception class is 'run' - ours was/is very much a continuation from nursery, just with more learning put into it. All of the children are coping really well, even DS1's best friend who is also an August baby

A friend DS's reception class in a different school went straight into 'formal' school teaching from their first term at school - and lots of the children in my friends DS's school are struggling.

I can sympathise, I mentioned today to ds2's reception teacher that ds3 starts Nursery September and school year af6ter: she was horrified! he is very small for his age (looks about 22 months I guess, he's 2 1/2) and has virtually no language. He's waiting to be seen by a communications clinic but there's a huge waiting list and I have no idea how he will cope.
But, like you, the LEA give no options bar home schooling and I can't do that.

DS1's yr2 teacher (when my ds2 was in reception) told me that she used to take her dd home for lunch when she was in reception then put her to bed for a nap (she was SAHM at the time) then take her back to school for the final playtime/storytime at 2.30! Her dd didn't realise how much she was missing.

I don't think you'd get away with it these days though.

alison, I see you have an option to start in January. If others do the same (i.e. if they make summer babies start then) I would seriously consider that.

Dd is an August baby and only started in January and she was fine. If you are worried about him not knowing people, perhaps ask the school if they intend to have a parent's meeting (they normally do) before the children start. That way you can meet with other parents and swap numbers and arrange to have a big picnic (we did this) in the summer holidays before the older ones are due to start.

Also, you will be amazed at how much your boy grows over the next few years! I doubt you will be the only mother who is concerned about how young their child is but one thing I can assure you, the reception teacher would have seen it all before! I also think (but I'm not 100% sure, you would need a teacher to confirm this!) but things like SATS are age adjusted to account for difference between the youngest and eldest.