MN JURY what do you think of this???????

[drosophila]

DS comes home from school and as always I ask him if he learnt anything interesting today. He starts to go on and on about money and I could tell he was a little upset.

Apparently he was given a load of coins and asked to give 10 different combinations of coins that would total 38p. He is 6 and in yr 1 (but in a mixed yr1/2 class).

Anyway it transpires that he could only come up with three (I think he spent most of his time chatting as he loves to chat) and the teacher TORE his page out of his copy book and gave it to his classmate to put in the bin. 'Was she angry?' I asked 'Yes' he said. When asked how he felt about it he said surprised and disappointed.

When I got him home I got out a load of coins and helped him see different ways he could make up 38p which he seemed happy with but honestly isn't this a bit much for a 6 yr old. He does love maths but still..... And most importantly should I speak to his teacher about her tearing the page out of his book.

i would be fuming and have a word. i think its very wrong. my son once came home very distressed when he was 7 because his teacher had told him if his artwork wasnt good enough she would throw it in the bin. he has a special teacher and extra lessons etc and although no diagnosis suspected dyspraxia. i was even more annoyed that it was art of all things. what difference does it make whether a 7 year old's art work is any good? she was a horrible woman with no patience whatsoever from what i could gather, the first teacher ds has ever disliked.

with my children I've always found it useful to talk to one of their friends. That way you get another view of what happened, although once they are a bit older boys do lie very convincingly for their friends Stories I've had from 6 year olds (but that didn't check out with their parents) included being vegetarian, allergic to a food they didn't want to eat, having their own horse......so I'd be gentle in approaching the teacher but I'd have to find out what was behind it.

Ah, this brings back memories of my class teacher when I was 8. She used to rip the pages out of my books because my handwriting was messy.
This was 21 yrs ago and still my strongest memory of school

does anyone remember that advert on TV for the NSPCC? It showed abused children of various ages. Áll sorts of abuse was suggested. One of the scenes showed a parent snatching a boy's homework off him and ripping it up.....

I remember that one tigermoth.
Drosophila I think you should def speak to the school. Teachers shouldn't humiliate pupils they should encourage them.

Well I spoke to the teacher. I was a bit vague and said that DS had been upset about not being able to do a maths question. She said that he could do it but that he spends his whole day (virtually) talking and always waits until the last min to complete his work. She said that he is very bright and she want to give him extension work but she can't cos he talks so much he doesn't finish with enough time to do any additional work.

Apparently she has tried everything (seperating him from his best friend etc) and today finally resorted to putting him on his own. She spent a lot of the time telling me how bright he is and can understand and do things that are practically unheard of at his age (masaging my ego ??) but his mouth is running away with him. He also struggles with writing and she thinks this may explain some of his slowness in completing work.

Thing is she sounded pretty frustrated when she was speaking to me and I can understand it. He is a challenging child and I have often been surprised at his abilities and I think that his lack of focus (her words) could restrict him. These words are all too familiar with me. DP and I were often accused of this in school although I was never as bright as DS is.

How do you get a child to stop chatting and start working??

Thanks for all your input.

Star chart. Soft rewards when get gets a specific number. A star each day (lesson if he is very chatty) the teacher thinks his behaviour has been OK.

drosophila- it sounds as if you could explain to your ds that he needs to show the teacher what he can do so that she can help him learn more. He needs to understand that some children are the fastest runner in their class, some the best reader etc and that the teacher need to help all of them to learn more. His brain needs exercise just like his body, especially if like he does you are lucky enough to have good brain. Once that is understood you need to agree with him and the teacher a way of ensuring that he understands the task, and the time frame. He needs to sit where he concentrates best and is distracted least. I sometimes put a card on the table for the child to read and focus on. I will do 8 sums in 10 minutes .. sort of thing. He then needs to get lots of praise and rewards for working and concetrating so that he learns to get the attention for the positive things and not for chatting etc. A star chart or similar at school would probably help him. When I use them in this sort of situation I find that if I catch the child not on task I just need to say " Are you thinking which sticker you will put on your chart when you've finished?" and the head goes straight down! no nagging or frustration just prompting and encouragement!
Whilst this seems like a huge problem perhaps now, I am sure that he will mature and adjust really quickly before you know it.
Good luck!

I have ripped a pg out of a child's book before on two seperate occasions.

The first was when the child had made holes in the page with his pencil then emptied his sharpenings onto the page and squashed them in making a real mess. I through the page in the bin and made him stay in at break to complete the task.

The second was when a very able child was grumpy because he hadn't been chosen as the best costume (it was fancy dress day). His handwriting was shocking with some words too small to read and others taking up three lines. When I asked him about it he said that if his costume was rubbish then his literacy should be too. I plainly told him it was unacceptable, ripped it out and showed it to his Dad after school.

I have to say, I felt justified both times. I didn't draw attention to it, I just let them know that it was an unacceptable use of the book and was only fit for the bin.

Having said that, if I were to rip out pages everytime a child spent the lesson chatting or didn't finish it would be a mighty paper mountain!

Can I just add that many children his age spend most of the day chatting. Lots of positive reinforcement and praise will ensure that by the time he reaches the juniors he will have matured and be more aware of what's expected of him and the rewards he can receive for conforming. Good luck with it.

yes, good luck.

Keep plugging away at the rewards and punishments and close communication with the teacher. My oldest son was a nightmare chatterbox and impossibly easy to distract in class (so I was told by countless teachers in the infants and first years of the juniors). It was a long, slow process in getting him calm and mature enough to focus.

I think a home school book was the best tool we had - not perfect but that daily line of communication between home and school, backed up with agreed rewards from the teachers and us, seemed to get through to him.And also, he had to sit by himself for most of a year. Or only sit with the very good children (luckily his best friend was a very well behaved, hard working little boy who could also put ds1 firmly in his place - what a stroke of luck!)

By year 4 we could see the improvement beginning. Having spent years not performing anywhere near to his ability, by the time he got to year 6 he was working harder, the teachers were happy with his work and he did well.

Obviously I threw the page in the bin rather than through it.

DS1 is also a complete chatterbox and according to teachers not producing work up to his ability.

This year (Y3) they can all get merits for particularly good things, and when they've got 10 they get something from the treasure box and to visit the head. So DS1 gets a merit if he starts work in numeracy 4 days in a row without having to be reminded.

It has got better as he has got older, but he still doesn't really see the point in many lessons - he has told me that he has so many interesting things that he wants to think about that he can't possibly concentrate on numeracy.

Perhaps if your son is so able, his teacher should just give him the extension work and not worry about his completing work he quite probably finds boring.

Yes, can I just add that if he's on extension level work there is no need for him to complete the other work first. He should go straight onto the extension work.
It makes me cringe to hear of teachers using extension work to occupy able early finishers. Extension work is work which extends the lesson objective and extends the able child in conjunction.

I feel so ignorant of the whole eduaction thing. Thanks for your info and tips.