Get together for reception parents...

[Gobbledigook]

...is it worth it??

It's a get together organised by the PTA so the new parents of reception children can get to know each other. For a couple of reasons I don't want to go:

1. I'm mega busy and could do with getting on with some work
2. I don't know anyone and I feel a bit nervous about going on my own (a bit shocked at that really - I'm very outgoing normally!)

Also, does it really matter that I know the other mums - do I have to? Would I not get to know them enough in the playground and at parties? Or is it going to help ds1 if I'm friends with his classmates mums??

I guess the upshot is, I'm not mad keen on going, I'd like to get to know people but it's a bit like hard work but I'd do it if I thought it would help ds in some way - he didn't go to the school nursery so he (and I) doesn't know anyone.

I'm sure I'm thinking about this far too much. PMT.

Gobbledigook, I don't think I would go either. I've noticed at our school that the mums are grouped into the 'preschool' groups, and I bet that would be exaggerated at an evening do. I think you'll get to know the people who you're going to get on with, and your child will make their own friends anyway.

Imo, you can't 'get to know' people in one evening anyway!

Personally i find those sort of things hard too. Your son will make friends regardless of whether you do. I find that I gradually get to know other parents as my children make friends with their children.

I'd say, if you're only a bit nervous, grit your teeth and go. There could be all sorts of advantages, and you'll never know what unless you go. And the very very worst would be that you could have used the time otherwise.

Advice would be different if you really hated the idea - I'm guessing you're like me and diffident rather than anxious?

Thanks.

TS - yes I think the mums that know each other from nursery (and I think some know each other from a slimming world meeting or something) will go tonight cos it's a chance for them to meet up with free drink!! So for me it could just be an extension of the playground nightmare!!

It won't influence how ds1 gets on in the classroom I'm sure.

I'm in a similar position. all but 2 in dd's Reception class went through the nursery, although not all coincided days. There was a pre term picnic where I met a few other mums, an evening drinks and nibbles which I didn't attend, and a coffee morning in a few weeks which I plan to go to. It is hard to fit in as the new bod among established friendships so have sp far tended to gravitate towards those who are also new to the school or are more open.

I also have an elder ds at same school and tend to meet those mums more as pick ups/drop offs are more likely to coincide. Also many of the Reception mums seem to to have younger children not older so feel I may have more in common with parents in ds' class.

I think go if it suits you, and do make the occasional effort, but don't feel under immense pressure to go to everything on offer. You won't be the only one missing I'm sure.

Hmmm, Oh I don't know!! I've asked a few if they are going and everyone I've asked has said they can't make it. SO I won't be the only one not there.

Look can you all just leave the bloody drinks thread and tell me if this is important?!

Personally I would go. These kids and their parents are going to be part of your life (like it or not!) for quite a few years! I too hate entering a room where I don't know anyone, but when DS1 started school I made a real effort and made a lot of friends I still see, even though DS1 left that school over three years ago. (Many a pleasant evening has been spent getting nicely sloshed and catching up on all the gossip). Never underestimate the usefulness of the "Can you take my child to X's party and I'll bring them both home" sort of stuff - the busier your life the more worth it it is! DS2 started at a new school last half term (end of Y1) and I'm finding it really tough going although people are friendly - the friendship groups are formed and people have their support systems in place. It's so much easier to do it in Reception when everyone else is in the same boat - go on, you might even enjoy it

I'd go too.
I've got some lovely friends from dd's nursery last year and love seeing them for a chat. (but i am sad and have no other friends! )

Now if dd falls out with her little possy i'll be Billy no mates again!
There are a few new mams whose children have started reception this year (and weren't at the nursery) and they do seems a bit nervous though so i can see why you are.
Go, you may be very pleasantly suprised!

It depends on how quickly you make friends. If you are the sort of person who can meet someone at a kid's party or the Christmas nativity play and be exchanging telephone numbers with them by the end of an hour, then don't go because, as you said, you will meet them all soon enough anyway.

If however, you find it hard to meet new people and you are just making excuses not to go because you don't fancy it, then I would say go as it is important to know the parents of the children in your child's class and this is as good an opportunity as any to do it. Plus you will be seen to be supportind the PTA which is important too in my mind. I loathe parents who have nothing to do with school activities and then moan about what is laid on or the poor facilities at the school. The PTA provides most of the little extras both in terms of social events and equipment in school and parents should help as much as they can, at least by supporting the things laid on for them.

I'd go to show willing if you are around

I think its nice to know the other mums .. some of them might be just up your street and up for a laugh

also the quicker you know other parents the more chance you have of sharing school drop-offs and pick-ups

OK, you're convincing me

I did get chatting to one Mum this morning and we both agreed it would be nice to get the boys to meet after school one day so I'm not entirely hopeless at making conversation. It's just when people are already in formed groups which some of them seem to be.

I feel like I'm 10 again!

I'd go. I'm finding it surprisingly lovely to meet other mothers at pick-up and drop-off - luckily, it's a very friendly atmosphere.

My long-term aim is some RL friends, but do you think I'm being over-ambitious ?

I'd go, too. You don't have to be bosom friends with everyone you meet but it can be useful to be friendly with them. It's also a good way to find out what's going on behind the scenes and to scope out the movers & shakers, of which there are always at least two per class, ime!

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Moi?

As well as the movers and shakers (totally agree suedonim) there is always at those things at least one other new wallflowery mother being brave (me) and she would be so relieved you turned up too.

Think I'll go....for a bit....49 up is on at 9

did you go then? were they all evil?

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MI,i don't think so, i feel i've made some lovely friends!

Did you go? How was it? I would have done, I must admit. But do understand your hesitancy.

Maybe she's been kidnapped by evil reception parents and we'll never hear from her again

I went to a coffee thing for new parents at dd's new school last week - it was made easy to go because it was just after drop-off time and I found out a few practical things I needed to know from people there. Plus talked to "my" class rep who is v. friendly and nice so I did feel it was worth the effort.

Nope didn't go! Had apathetic crisis of confidence and couldnt' face it. Been talking to people this morning though and most of them didn't go - they said you just get to know people in the playground and at parties (as I thought) and that the evening thing was really to try to recruit people into the PTA

Well avoided me thinks!