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Sudden improvement after early signs of ANOREXIA- confused about 15 yo dd

19 replies

TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 19:57

Ok so my lovely 15 yo has lost nearly 2 stone since Xmas ( most of that was during the first 3 months). She has been showing a great many of the psychological signs of anorexia but is still in the healthy weight range.

Things reached an all time low at half term and she has only just been allowed to remain in school for a full day due to the number of skipped meals. We have been worried sick- huge impact on the whole family.

We got the GP to do a referral to the specialist team locally and I managed to get some advice over the phone and were promised an appointment soon.

We immediately put in place the strategies that they suggested and worked with the school following a clear plan. Dd was aware that a failure to eat would mean she couldn't stay in school for the full day.

Now, I'm having to pinch myself because since that day, dd has gone from strength to strength and ten days on she seems to be eating normally. I just can't make sense of this. How can she go from being so scary and out of control with what she was saying/ how she was behaving around eating and being consumed with guilt about eating... to this sudden improvement?

I'm relieved and delighted and really confused. But also we have her assessment this week and I'm worried that she won't get any help but could then slip back. Can anyone advise me what I should do/ say? She did improve once before then slipped back worse than ever. Dd said that she feels like a fraud for getting help and I know that sometimes appointments with gp/ meeting at school has triggered the fasting to get worse as she has said she feels that she needs to comply with expectations by not eating.

Can anyone Shed any light on this? Does this often happen that someone seems on a downward trajectory towards a full blown eating disorder but quickly turns it around? Please help me make sense of this.

TIA

OP posts:
Caulkheadupnorf · 25/06/2017 20:01

I ate just enough to get people off my case for a long time. Is that an option?

ImperialBlether · 25/06/2017 20:03

Is she making herself sick or taking laxatives?

TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 20:04

Caulk, I get the feeling that she is starting to enjoy her food again ( in last two days) and the guilt is lessening its grip.

Imperial, I'd say a confident 'no' on both counts. Thanks.

OP posts:
TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 20:05

Her mood is better too.

OP posts:
Haggisfish · 25/06/2017 20:08

I did. I was on the verge of an eating disorder but recovered very quickly. For me it's about control of my life. Once I feel back in control my eating issues disappear.

TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 20:10

Haggisfish, very interesting. I think that possibly seeing me and put firm boundaries in place took a pressure off her about deciding if she should eat. I wonder if then felt less out of control and safer. Although I realise that you meant taking control yourself, not others taking control.

OP posts:
TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 20:11

'Seeing me And school' that should say.

OP posts:
Haggisfish · 25/06/2017 20:14

Yes that could be it as well. It's so difficult.

TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 20:16

Things escalated over 2-3 weeks and suddenly everyone seemed to be involved - gp, school, friends, their parents expressing concern. Maybe it was a wake up call. Can that happen?

OP posts:
Strawberryshortcake40 · 25/06/2017 20:21

Are you absolutely positive she isn't hiding food? When she isn't around search her room, drawers, bags, shoes, boxes, under bed, pockets of clothes.... if that's all clear then you might be okay :)

TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 20:23

Do you mean hiding food that I think she's eaten? If so, no she def isn't as most of it has been eaten with me.

OP posts:
Strawberryshortcake40 · 25/06/2017 20:46

I have an anorexic daughter, she can sit in front of me and hide food without me realising. She hides it up sleeves, in pockets, down the sofa etc. They are masters at it. Until you are in the depths of this dreadful disease you don't realise just what it makes them capable of.

I hope your DD isn't doing that but I truly had no idea until I found the food in her room. Lots in school bag too where she hid her lunches.

Strawberryshortcake40 · 25/06/2017 20:47

Just check. It will take a few minutes and I expect her therapy team will ask if you have looked for hidden food.

TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 20:54

Oh strawberry, I'm so sorry to hear about your dd. I have been worried sick and we are not even at the same stage as you are so my heart goes out to you both. I do go in dd's room a fair bit and recently needed to search for an inhaler and sun cream for her sister to take on a school trip and there was no sign of hidden food, thankfully.

OP posts:
Caulkheadupnorf · 25/06/2017 20:56

I had anorexia for a long time. Please get open ended therapy for her. I had to work out the reasons why I had it rather than just eating more.

TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 21:01

Caulk, she was self harming before Xmas and then suddenly stopped when we realised what she was doing. She promised not to do it again...then switched to a new form of self harm. I will definitely continue therapy for her- either her current 'regualar' therapist who she has been seeing for anxiety since last July, or a private specialist if he referral people don't take her on.

OP posts:
TicketyTockety · 25/06/2017 21:02

And thank you so much for for sharing your experience, caulk.

OP posts:
Strawberryshortcake40 · 25/06/2017 21:35

I'm so pleased to hear that she isn't hiding it! I wasn't trying to be harsh, I just wish I had known before thinking my DD was getting better.

I hope your DD makes a full recovery really soon :)

Minimoan · 01/07/2017 00:01

This support forum for families with children/young people with eating disorders gets tremendous praise - worth a look?

www.aroundthedinnertable.org/?forum=136439#gsc.tab=0

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