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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

Newly single mum of 1 - confused about what support/benefits I might be entitled to?

32 replies

MCE1 · 18/10/2024 21:03

Hi all

Looking for some advice/wisdom for those who have gone through something similar...

Recently split up with partner (of 15 years - we're not married) and we have x1 3yo daughter. Not only am I devasted about the end of the relationship but we have literally just moved into a (rental) house in a different part of London, so I am away from friends/familiar place which is causing a lot of anxiety as we navigate the split and further upheaval for our daughter.

We co-own a flat (shared ownership) which we started to rent out to tenants (it's a long story but it's currently undergoing cladding remediation works so we can't sell it) so that we could move and rent this bigger property.

We are planning to get out of the house contract early (have spoken to the agency and they have agreed if we continue to pay rent until new tenants are found and we have to pay a get-out fee too) and go our separate ways. I will be sole carer so need to find a place for my daughter and I to live in.

I am torn between trying to find a smaller place in this new area for my daughter and I, or if I go back and live with my mum for a bit. The latter is not hugely appealing as I will definitely feel like a loss of independence and it will be another significant move/upheaval for my daughter - we'd have to change nurseries again etc.

I'm also worried that I need to apply for a reception school place for daughter by Jan '25, and that's making me think I need to know where I want us to live asap - so that she has a few months to get used to new place/area etc. and start to get to know potential peers before she moves into school.

The other worry for me is financial. I work FT and earn about £45k which I know is decent but won't get me very far in terms of solo renting/paying solo childcare costs etc. I don't think I can expect to get anything from ex partner. I'm also thinking of cutting my hours down so that I can spend more time with daughter, and do the wrap-around childcare to reduce costs on that front.

I'm not sure what sort of benefits I will be entitled to (if any)? I did a quick calculation on Entitledto which came up with £339 a week (which seems a lot?!) Does anyone have experience of applying for Universal Credit, on these sort of scenarios?

Grateful for any words of advice or wisdom! Thanks so much.

OP posts:
Original poster
MCE1 · 19/10/2024 19:29

ImNoSuperman · 19/10/2024 19:25

@MCE1 Does your shared ownership agreement/mortgage agreement allow you to rent out to tenants?

It does - we have special dispensation to do it whilst works are underway as we (and others in the block) are unable to sell. This has been agreed with mortgage provider and housing association.

OP posts:
ImNoSuperman · 19/10/2024 19:41

MCE1 · 19/10/2024 19:29

It does - we have special dispensation to do it whilst works are underway as we (and others in the block) are unable to sell. This has been agreed with mortgage provider and housing association.

Show quote history

What's the lease on your new place like? I know it would be a nightmare but is it affordable/suitable for your tenants to take over? Is that a possibility so you can at least move into your own house and get any housing assistance you could be entitled to? Could you meet the difference in the rent if it would save you money overall?

He's left you in such a awful position, seems malicious given the timing as well.

AnotherEmma · 19/10/2024 20:31

MCE1 · 19/10/2024 18:51

Thanks - he earns less than me, but I don't know for sure. Really helpful to understand that the flat we're renting out will be seen as income. The timing of everything is terrible, as we've only just rented the flat out in the last month to tenants for a two year contract, and moved out ourselves at the same time. Really sadly the relationship has just broken down and he doesn't want to try and work through it this time.

That's an interesting point about changing the ownership terms, I hadn't thought about that. I assume he'd want to take his equity though, and not pay off the money he would receive into the mortgage pot so I think I'd still be paying for the same amount of mortgage and more rent in that circumstance? Will explore that as an option though as he might be amenable to it.

Child benefit - yes we are claiming that. Child maintenance, will start looking into putting in a claim of some sort for that.

Thanks for your reply - that's been really helpful.

Show quote history

You're welcome.

Was the end of the relationship completely out of the blue? It seems strange that everything seemed to be going fine - enough for the two of you to commit to living elsewhere for at least 2 years - and now it's ending. Did you find out he'd been cheating, or something? (Feel free to ignore those questions if you'd rather not discuss it - I know you've been focusing on the practicalities rather than the reason for the split.)

I also wonder if there was a specific reason for the 2 year fixed term tenancy, rather than 1 year which is standard... it obviously doesn't allow much flexibility. Is there any kind of break clause in the tenancy agreement? Unfortunately there are very limited circumstances you can legally evict the tenants within the fixed term (such as significant rent arrears, or if they break terms of the tenancy agreement). I think the only way to end their tenancy would be if they agreed to it (this is called mutual surrender). You could try sending them a letter or email, explaining that unfortunately your circumstances have changed, and asking if they would consider ending the tenancy early - you could offer to pay their removal costs and agency fees for a new tenancy, plus obviously refunding their deposit in full and any rent owing. They might not agree to it and if they don't you can't push it as that might constitute harrassment. But it's worth a try at least.

I do think you might have grounds to argue that your equity in the property should be disregarded, since you can't actually sell it and you can't evict the tenants either. I can't remember off the top of my head how the rental income will be calculated as income for UC... do your tenants pay you all their rent, and then you use to it pay rent to the HA and to pay the mortgage? Or do the tenants pay some rent to the HA and some to you? Again you might be able to argue that you have very little actual income from it - after the HA rent and the mortgage have been paid. So the deduction from your UC might not be huge.

It's a complicated one (and I've encountered a lot of benefits queries in my work!) so you will definitely need to contact Help to Claim and the adviser will need to check with their supervisor or team leader. If I got this query I'd be checking the benefits handbook and talking to benefit specialist colleagues.

Original poster
MCE1 · 22/10/2024 15:55

AnotherEmma · 19/10/2024 20:31

You're welcome.

Was the end of the relationship completely out of the blue? It seems strange that everything seemed to be going fine - enough for the two of you to commit to living elsewhere for at least 2 years - and now it's ending. Did you find out he'd been cheating, or something? (Feel free to ignore those questions if you'd rather not discuss it - I know you've been focusing on the practicalities rather than the reason for the split.)

I also wonder if there was a specific reason for the 2 year fixed term tenancy, rather than 1 year which is standard... it obviously doesn't allow much flexibility. Is there any kind of break clause in the tenancy agreement? Unfortunately there are very limited circumstances you can legally evict the tenants within the fixed term (such as significant rent arrears, or if they break terms of the tenancy agreement). I think the only way to end their tenancy would be if they agreed to it (this is called mutual surrender). You could try sending them a letter or email, explaining that unfortunately your circumstances have changed, and asking if they would consider ending the tenancy early - you could offer to pay their removal costs and agency fees for a new tenancy, plus obviously refunding their deposit in full and any rent owing. They might not agree to it and if they don't you can't push it as that might constitute harrassment. But it's worth a try at least.

I do think you might have grounds to argue that your equity in the property should be disregarded, since you can't actually sell it and you can't evict the tenants either. I can't remember off the top of my head how the rental income will be calculated as income for UC... do your tenants pay you all their rent, and then you use to it pay rent to the HA and to pay the mortgage? Or do the tenants pay some rent to the HA and some to you? Again you might be able to argue that you have very little actual income from it - after the HA rent and the mortgage have been paid. So the deduction from your UC might not be huge.

It's a complicated one (and I've encountered a lot of benefits queries in my work!) so you will definitely need to contact Help to Claim and the adviser will need to check with their supervisor or team leader. If I got this query I'd be checking the benefits handbook and talking to benefit specialist colleagues.

Edited
Show quote history

Thanks again for this really helpful post. I've had a chat with the agency we are letting our flat out through and they've confirmed we can't break it. have done some further googling and as you say it can only be done in extreme circumstances, a section 21 etc. Feel horrible trying to force out the tenants as they've not done anything wrong, so writing them a letter to explain sounds like a good idea to try at least.

OP posts:
LadyLapsang · 24/10/2024 18:35

On child maintenance, surely you have pretty up to date information on his income for the recent rental and mortgage checks.

Viewfrommyhouse · 24/10/2024 19:12

How did he prove his income for the mortgage you took out together?

ShinyShona · 14/11/2024 09:19

arethereanyleftatall · 18/10/2024 21:18

Wouldn't your first port of call to be to look to her father for financial help rather than tax payers?
Why can't you apply for child maintenance?

I don't know why in your posts you are always obsessed with tax payers not supporting single mothers. Based on your own posts, it's doubtful you can even be bothered to earn enough to pay any tax yourself because you prefer to live off your ex so it's not like it's your money anyway.

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