What do you do without which other people think are essential?

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My other thread got me thinking about budgeting and what cut backs I can make. I wondered if there's anything mumsnet-ers do without which lots of other people view as a necessity. Mine for example are:
Professional hair care (cuts, colour)
Manicures/pedicures
Fabric conditioner
New clothes for myself and dp

Agree with the above, regarding treats - of course the occasional treat is nice but so many people seem to think that "treats" and "presents" are an essential part of life - the rubbish that is spouted on the Christmas threads, year after year (and yes, I know I don't have to read them ) about 'Christmas Eve Boxes', new pyjamas, pantomime tickets, huge long lists of stocking fillers and Christmas presents - because the magic of Christmas is seeing your child's face when they wake up to a mountain of presents. Then of course the inevitable 'skint and overspent' threads in the New Year. .

It's also treat inflation. A treat for me would be a nice chocolate bar, because I only get them occasionally. But everyone buys whatever they want all the time, so to 'treat' themselves they have to spend loads. I have a friend who has been busy at work recently so is treating herself to a spa day which is over £100 (she asked me if I'd like to go with her and I politely made my excuses!).

But in general I hate the word 'treat'. It makes me think of dog training (especially when people use it like 'oh DD has been good so I'm giving her a treat'!)

Don't get me started on Christmas presents.

Alcohol, cigarettes, date nights, make up (special occasions only which are rare), haircuts only twice per year, nails and other beauty treatments I use a bit of coconut oil and polish at home (now and again), second car, bought lunches/coffees, holidays, sky tv, labelled clothing.

We only use the dryer if totally needed. The kids get preloved clothing unless I really can't find what they need. I only buy new clothes if I really need something if I can't find it preloved.

Holidays
New clothes for me and dp
Meals out
Shop at lidel or Aldi
Expensive haircuts - i nowuse a mobile hairdressers
No gardener
No windowcleaner
No car valet
No cleaner

It's tough, o work full time and have to do everything else too

Did anyone say bikini waxes yet?

I had it done, I think, 3 times before waking up to the fact that it's painful, undignified, expensive and pointless. I bought a Panasonic Trimmer and keep things neat and itch-free down below. The thing cost me the same as one bikini wax job.

Oh, coffee! Luckily I don't drink it so don't feel I'm missing out but seriously, the world has gone crazy for coffee. What a waste of money - buy a kettle!

Just the usual stupid things
Cable TV
Alcohol (for the most part)
Those sheer curtain you out in front of your real curtains
Cigarettes
Illegal drugs
Daily newspapers
Magazines (apart from the occasional economist)
Manicures
Eyebrow waxing/string pulling thing
Any form of professional hair removal

Things I have stopped in last 6mths-
No smart phone. Love this as so much more aware, no FB either!
Stopped buying lunches out
Stopped buying soft drinks like cans of cola and take a bottle of water out.
Don't buy make up
Don't drink alcohol
Not fussed on shoes (but am a clothes addict!)

Some of this sounds absolutely miserable!

Not having a holiday in 24 years, ffs why? Obvs if your completely skint, fair enough but a few nights away wouldn't hurt.

I am hopesless at hair/makeup/skincare/nails etc etc so i suppose we save money on all that.
We hardly buy any clothes - again we are not too interested bar comfort and appropriateness for occasion/weather
organic anything

Things like whether people can manage without a car surely depend on their choice of location/job.....or if the school lottery business means your kids end up at multiple schools miles away in diff directions!

Hair dye. Took me a year to grow out my hair grey. Never had so many complements.

Bloody hell, I thought I was frugal till I read this thread

Soap

.... I am allergic mind

-2nd car
-hairdressers
-cleaner / gardener / dog-walker
-posh food- (lidl for most shopping!)
-beauty / salon treatments
-nights out (would rather have people over for dinner)

What I do see as essential right now that others might see as luxury are;

• music lessons for the younger children
• books (ill buy second hand and use the library a couple of times a month, but love owning great books)
• breaks away. Happy to do youth hostels, cheap b and b’s, crappy out of town hotels etc, but seeing different places is very important to me and we try to do something every 6 weeks or so.

Will say when I buy something I usually buy it so it will last, for example my GHDs were bought with my birthday money 10 years ago and still going strong Similar with few designer bags I've bought - all loved, leather and will last me a lifetime if I take care of them - most of them have been from consignment stores so second hand.

Things I go without :

Cleaner
Nanny
Gardener
Live TV/sky/tv license
Magazines/books
Ready meals/convenience meals
Premade cooking sauces - way cheaper to make your own
Taxis
Baby books (buy in charity shops)
Most of my kids toys are second hand or presents so no costs there
Don't smoke
Pregnant so no alcohol for another year

Holidays

Tumble dryer
Salon-coloured hair
Manicures
Shop bought lunch (I bring my own)
Taxis
Magazines
Loads of things really.

This thread is really interesting. It never occurred to me that manicures or coffees whilst out were seen by some as "essential" and I was living frugally but not having them. Actually, I'm not having them as I just don't like them.
Someone else has suggested not having childcare as though it is a choice. Obviously it is a choice but I think social services would have something to say if DH and I chose not to pay for childcare for our 7yo & 5yo whilst we were out at work for 12 hours a day.
Also "activities - what's wrong with the park". The DC aren't going to learn to swim or how to play the piano in the park. Obviously both of those skills are luxuries but, if you are in the fortunate position of being able to afford to pay for activities and choose not to, I don't think you can simply put it down to being frugal.

Surprised how many list 'a car' as not essential. I guess if you're in a town/city then fair enough; but if you are like me in a small village where The Bus goes once a day, and you have to get your children to schools in various neighbouring villages, a car is absolutely essential.

at the idea that 'prescription glasses' are a luxury people could do without - I can barely get out of bed without my glasses (-12 in both eyes, astigmatism) and have had to wear prescription glasses since the age of 4, but you crack on if you can get away with £6 for 2 - and think yourself bloody lucky.

Cleaner
'Ironing lady' (wtf)
Those meal-in-box things that come through the post (gousto etc)
2nd car
Car less than 15 years old
Waxing, pedicures, etc
Sky TV
Gym membership
Holidays (mainly camping)
Home improvements (eg new kitchen/conservatory/decking in the garden etc)
Shoes (obviously I do own shoes but only a few pairs and mainly cheapo converse type)

But I do spend money on food, wine, perfume, books and school fees.

Oh, and a nespresso machine or similar.

I never use clingfilm. Saves me at least £5 a year