ok, i have done a spending spread sheet to find out what i spend money on

[NormaSmuff]

now what
How do I stop?
i was very proud popping to tesco the other day and only buying the bare minimum, very hard to resist the temptations
what next?

How many credit cards do you have? Do you also have loans? Can't you transfer to a 0% credit card then work to pay them off in the interest free period? If this isn't an option, there are some good loan rates around, you could take a loan and pay them all off, then you're paying one [lower interest] payment.

You have to list all of your debts with the interest rate next to them. You do not pay the smallest debt off first. You start by paying minimum payments on all except the one with the highest interest rate. You work out the most you can afford to pay per month and plough it into that until it's gone. You then continue paying the same amount (plus what you were already paying for the min payment) to the next highest interest rate debt, and so on, working through one at a time.

If you're happy to tackle the smallest one first... set a short deadline. That will create a weekly/daily value you are committed to paying off. Decide what you can miss out on each week/day to reach the target... and then rather than have that thing - you can think "great, small price - but I'm paying it off". When you've cleared it completely, you could even treat yourself to something free (and it has to be free!) like a walk out with family/friends: or some time for yourself and a video you've not watched in ages.

The things you mention as a treat Spring I would do regularly just to relieve the boredom of watching every penny. If you are bored you are more likely to spend. I keep my eye open for free activities and vouchers for the odd cheap meal out.

Gas and electric Take up to date meter readings, work out your usage, then use a comparison site (moneysavingexpert.com will point you in the right direction) to find the provider with the best deal for you.

If working out your usage sounds hard, just take readings and call up your existing provider and ask them "am I on the cheapest tariff for my usage?". They will be helpful.

Take a pair of scissors to your credit card. I can't help,thinking tomatoes are not the problem.
Cigarettes? Alcohol? Coffees and lunches from Starbucks/Pret?
Write to credit card companies say you're struggling and ask them to freeze the interest CAB will help with letter.
Branded goods? Use Boots shampoo and conditioner instead of herbal essence, soap not expensive shower gels. Own brand laundry goods then line dry rather than tumbling. Small changes.

I did this when I was laid up with a broken toe. It followed years of living hand to mouth. I just looked at my bank account made a list of stuff like how much I was spending on regular items like insurance broadband mobile phone then went on Martin's money saving expert to see where I could save. Reduced it all by £700 a year. Then tackled groceries I just don't go to the supermarket more than once a week and I don't do it online I spend tooo much if I do. I also make my grown up kids pay me back if they borrow.

thanks for further advice.
No I genuinely dont have starbucks, and I do have shop's brand.
although we had a day out yesterday with icecream and chips. and my downfall is my dd's. Paying for a trip for them for instance. on the credit card. Its a Guilt Thing.

otoh I am actively looking for further employment to boost my income and may take up the suggestion of writing to the credit card companies askign them to freeze interest.

and i am stopping the online shop as now it seems having to spend £40 just to get it delivered is pointless as I am adding extras to make it up to £40.

Could you shop fortnightly? That way you can still shop online.

Write and ask anyway. If you don't ask you don't get.