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Original poster

Parents of 12yr olds to vaccinate or not vaccinate that's my big struggle! Advice please?

124 replies

sparklymumSW4 · 02/02/2022 19:48

Hi all,
So let me start by saying myself and hubster all jabbed up inc booster and I work in the NHS so I'm by no way against the covid vaccine personally and I 100% accept the decisions of those who choose not to BUT... not sure how I feel about kids vaccines my twins turn 12 in a few weeks and I'm struggling over vaccinating them or not one child is happy to have it an the other is not ultimately I will make the decision but I just don't feel like I want them to have it right now as they are still quite small and I had a horrendous reaction to all 3 jabs.... would love to hear from parents of those turning 12 soon and those who have turned 12 and your opinions. Thanks

OP posts:
Soontobe60 · 02/02/2022 20:47

@LittleOwl153

12 in August. Jabbed in December. Her choice. She has Pfizer no side effect at all. I had AZ then Pfizer booster - had minor (24hr) issues with first only) her dad had Pfizer all three and nothing but a headache.

Her dad was for it, I was against it. We're both fully jabbed, and nhs Staff. I explained my concerns to her - around fertility, future issues in a still growing child etc. Her dad gave the official line. I said I'd sign her form for school if she wanted it (so she didn't think I'd think she'd gone against me etc)

So you tried to persuade her using unproven, emotive arguments. And you work for the NHS?
Soontobe60 · 02/02/2022 20:49

@SeeminglyOblivious

My eldest is (just) 14 and hasn't had it...and nor did we let him decide...although this wasn't an issue as he didn't care either way! It was solely mine and DH's decision and I called when his letter arrived and took him off the list.

He's recently asked if he can have it. When questioned why it turns out that he was feeling a bit left out because all his mates have had it 🙄 which confirms my belief that DH and I were right to make the decision for him.

I've told him that we can talk about it but he'll need to provide more reasoning for having it than that...hasn't mentioned it since.

So you’ve taken away any autonomy he has in his own body.
SeeminglyOblivious · 02/02/2022 21:07

So you’ve taken away any autonomy he has in his own body.

I made a medical decision for a child.

I won't let him pierce his ear either. Nor will I allow my 11 year old to dye his hair.

I take away their autonomy over lots of things, frequently, as do all parents Smile

Original poster
sparklymumSW4 · 02/02/2022 21:23

Thank you all so much for sharing your thoughts and experiences.
I still have a few weeks to decide and have a chat with them about it. X

OP posts:
TCMcK · 02/02/2022 21:36

Our 13 year old daughter isn’t having it. She’s had Covid twice & she was ill for a few days, cold symptoms etc. she doesn’t need the vaccine. It will stop us from traveling this year but we’re okay with that. We enjoy holidays in the UK anyway. I can’t believe how many people let their 12 year old decide. Each to their own Smile

TCMcK · 02/02/2022 21:45

This. Only time will tell about the long term side effects. Most parents I know are vaccinating their children on the basis that they can go on holiday.

Nomicron · 02/02/2022 21:59

@Wellbythebloodyhell

IF the vaccine had stronger impact on transmission or the effectiveness of the vaccine lasted a hell of a lot longer and we had more Information regarding any long term side effects I could be more inclined to vaccinate, however as 1 DC showed no symptoms at all and the other literally coughed for a day when they had covid ,I'm at a loss as to why they need vaccinating and what benefit it is to them Confused
Tbh these are my thoughts too. If it had a noticeable effect on transmission then yes I’d be all for it but as my main reason for wanting ds to have it is so we can go on holiday that feels a bit wrong.
Wellbythebloodyhell · 02/02/2022 22:00

Most parents I know are vaccinating their children on the basis that they can go on holiday.
I'm shocked at the amount of parents who would vaccinate against a virus their dc are not at risk from just to go on holiday 😳

Wellbythebloodyhell · 02/02/2022 22:03

Tbh these are my thoughts too.
If it had a noticeable effect on transmission then yes I’d be all for it but as my main reason for wanting ds to have it is so we can go on holiday that feels a bit wrong.

@Nomicron I also have a holiday booked to Spain for summer booked last year I can not bring myself to vaccinate them just for the sake of a fortnight in the sun

Mojoj · 02/02/2022 22:04

Kids don't need to be vaccinated.

Remmy123 · 02/02/2022 22:04

I didn't vaccinate as most of the year group have had it and been absolutely fine so seemed pointless. Made me nervous as it is such a new vaccine.

BertieQueen · 02/02/2022 22:05

My 12 year old is not having the vaccine. His choice.

TheChip · 02/02/2022 22:09

My 13 and 17yo aren't having it, nor is my 11 year old.

bluechilli47 · 02/02/2022 22:18

Like anything else medical, it's ultimately the parents decision at that age. We discussed it and they had the vaccine. Caught Covid later and glad we all had been vaccinated. Now discussing the upcoming HPV vaccine which they will also get and why.

milkysmum · 02/02/2022 22:31

My 12 year old has had both doses. Little bit of a sore arm nothing else.
My 10 year old keeps asking when he can have his too. If they reduce the age I would consent for him to have also.

TCMcK · 02/02/2022 22:33

@Wellbythebloodyhell

*Tbh these are my thoughts too. If it had a noticeable effect on transmission then yes I’d be all for it but as my main reason for wanting ds to have it is so we can go on holiday that feels a bit wrong.*

@Nomicron I also have a holiday booked to Spain for summer booked last year I can not bring myself to vaccinate them just for the sake of a fortnight in the sun

Couldn’t agree with this more! The world’s gone utterly mad.
Jenjen21 · 02/02/2022 22:40

Work in the Irish health service.. Myself and husband fully jabbed and boostered! Prefer to wait a while for kids, would prefer if vaccine was a bit more established. Both kids had covid and were a bit tired with no other symptoms.

Ostef1 · 02/02/2022 22:41

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

madmomma · 02/02/2022 22:47

Mine aren't having it. They don't need it, and going on holiday isn't a reason in my mind to give them a jab for something that poses virtually no risk to them.

Schoolchoicesucks · 02/02/2022 22:49

@Wellbythebloodyhell

Most parents I know are vaccinating their children on the basis that they can go on holiday. I'm shocked at the amount of parents who would vaccinate against a virus their dc are not at risk from just to go on holiday 😳
It's not just about "a holiday" though. It's reduction in severity of illness (though hopefully as with the more recent variants, severity of illness is reducing anyway), reduction in transmission, being able to fully participate in normal life - no self-isolation, fewer restrictions on travel, admission to restaurants, attractions etc etc.

Holidays may be there and nudge towards tipping the scales towards a decision to vaccinate, but its all the other things too weighing in.

Omicron has been (thankfully) very mild, but the next variant may not be so and the pfizer jabs for over 12s could well provide some protection.

AyeEee123 · 02/02/2022 22:51

My 13yo has had his first jab and his second is next month. I booked him in and he was happy to have it done especially as he was so poorly when he had Covid last year. Why anyone wouldn’t protect their children from a novel virus when we have no idea of the long term effects of it is beyond me.

altercrisp · 02/02/2022 23:00

Funny to hear people saying that their kids have had omicron recently and that they were glad they were vaccinated as they had mild symptoms...

Ours are 7 and 11 and so not vaccinated and also just had covid.
They were literally feverish for 1 day and the next day they were right as rain and running around again.

But now we are in a bind about travelling abroad for our soon to be 12 year old.

The world has gone mad.

adriftabroad · 02/02/2022 23:00

No way is my 13 yr old having it. Madness.

And it's not her decision, it's mine.

LittleOwl153 · 02/02/2022 23:01

@Soontobe60 So you tried to persuade her using unproven, emotive arguments. And you work for the NHS?

No I didn't try to pursuade her. We had a discussion around vaccines and medicines in general and the processes of trial and approval and about how things that seem safe at the time turn out to have impacts later. And lots of other things. My DH is frontline in impacted areas of a hospital - he has very clear views about the unvacinated - sometimes it is about balance. I also told her why despite my reservations for her - I'd had mine as soon as I was able. We also talked about travel restrictions - we have family overseas. And she'd also had covid in Sept - along with the rest of the family - with none of us having anything but minor symptoms. (Pre vaccination for her).

I don't think it is a simple choice for the kids. They are not getting as sick as older folks. They do have more to loose if problems are found 10/20/50 years down track. So no I don't think it is wrong to have a discussion about any medical treatment. (and believe me she's had enough of those over her short lifetime!)

pikapikapukachu · 02/02/2022 23:05

But vaccine research has shown that the risk of long term side effects, or of side effects developing at later date, is negligible.
There are a lot of comments on this thread where concerns aren't based on evidence.