How do you feel about family members going to large indoor events?

[Doyoumind]

To me this feels like such a bad idea. I'm not really concerned about my health or theirs but I am concerned about older family members who they are going to come into contact with. It feels so irresponsible.

You have to realise the pandemic has messed with your head. It is not normal to think like this. Healthy adults can go out and enjoy a gig without being dubbed irresponsible. LFT before seeing vulnerable but that's it.

My older (mid 70s) relatives are joining us for a meal and panto. I wonder if we'll still be allowed around for lunch the next day after such risky behaviour?

Also need to understand the difference between ‘less’ and ‘fewer’ before making a long list like that 😂

My DS 25 has recently been to a packed cinema, nightclub, pubs. He cannot understand why we have cancelled a big indoor party and even a football match. He was supposed to be going to a nightclub last Friday, but was home early so presume his friends didn’t want to go, as he clearly would have been up for it. He is staying in evenings now till we see relatives Christmas Day and says he won’t go out NYE if we have a party at home. He’s booked his booster for early January.

He knows so many people, his age, who have covid at the moment, who fortunately, it seems just a cold and they feel fine after a couple of days. Even his Manager who has no spleen, only has a cold. He also has friends who haven’t been vaccinated, some because they’ve had covid and it wasn’t too bad, or in his words, they are thick.

@Fl0w3ry

I think people should make their own decisions. However, I think if vulnerable people are present for Christmas plans and feel concerned about the risks others have taken, the risk-takers should not be included in Christmas plans with them where possible or should test before meeting the vulnerable at least. As a family we have chosen not to see people taking lots of risks over Christmas.

Interestingly, the OP doesn't mention the vulnerable family members having any concerns at all. The only worries we've been told about are hers.

I couldn’t give a shit what other grown ups do. The time to stop policing others has been & gone largely - there are measures in place (eg testing) to ensure people are ‘safe’ (I hate that word in this context) - what more can you do? If you’re still worrying, like some others have said, you’ve gone too far. Time to stop the madness & realise life means going outside of the house for most of us!

My vulnerable family member doesn't know about these people going to the gig and would be really concerned if they did.

I'm not policing other people. I'm not even commenting to them on it, in fact. They have made their own choice. But I still think it's selfish choice. It's in no way equivalent to going to the shops for whoever made that comparison. It's mixing closely together over a number of hours in a confined space with thousands of people who are shouting and singing. They've made the decision it's safe for them, and though they aren't young it may well be, but it's the lack of consideration for others that concerns me. These same people have actually very happily policed other people's activities in the recent past, because at that point they were worried about themselves.

@Doyoumind

My vulnerable family member doesn't know about these people going to the gig and would be really concerned if they did.

I'm not policing other people. I'm not even commenting to them on it, in fact. They have made their own choice. But I still think it's selfish choice. It's in no way equivalent to going to the shops for whoever made that comparison. It's mixing closely together over a number of hours in a confined space with thousands of people who are shouting and singing. They've made the decision it's safe for them, and though they aren't young it may well be, but it's the lack of consideration for others that concerns me. These same people have actually very happily policed other people's activities in the recent past, because at that point they were worried about themselves.

Pretty significant drip feed there. You really ought to have included that information in your OP.

Family members should be honest with each other so all consent can be informed. That's the problem here. You're right to be concerned if this isn't happening, you're wrong in much of the rest of what you say.

Where's the drip feed?

@Doyoumind

Where's the drip feed?

The incredibly significant point that the vulnerable family member doesn't know. That should've been in the OP.

Dd works front of house in a west end theatre. She takes daily lateral flows and a cr if she comes into contact with any cases. That’s all we can do.

My youngsters have agreed to socialise outdoors onky before seeing their 90-year-old gran at Christmas. They are also aware that soaring omicron rates are hitting staffing levels in hospitals, fire stations etc and they prefer to be responsible. But AIBU is likely to bring out the posters who are less able to think of others OP. But fwiw yes your relatives are selfish.

For people that are anxious about this, does this mean you think that gigs/large crowd events should be exclusively for people who are a) willing to quarantine for 7-10 days after attending and b) don't have any vulnerable close contacts?

There is risk in absolutely everything we do. Life would be completely joyless if we spent it worrying about contracting a virus that we are immunised against and has a very small chance of causing us significant harm.

It's not a drip feed. I don't see how it's relevant to my original question. I was answering someone who asked me what my family member thought.

@Doyoumind

It's not a drip feed. I don't see how it's relevant to my original question. I was answering someone who asked me what my family member thought.

It's entirely relevant because before that it was just you overstepping. If they were both aware, the only appropriate response is that adults get to decide these things for themselves and there's no reason for you to even have an opinion. As they're not, there's a problem.

Working, education, medical appointments and shopping for essentials has to happen. Social stuff is a choice. I do understand and agree with you op.

I think your OP needed to be clearer what your exact concern was .

Is your family not doing LFTs before meeting up? To me, that is the sensible thing .

I feel nothing, no CEV relatives to avoid anymore, she's already dead. I honestly don't care what other people are doing.

I went with 3,000 other selfish people to see Bill Bailey at the Birmingham indoor arena the other day - it was brilliant

Sadly he’s now had to postpone all his Scottish dates

@Omicrone

I feel a bit like the 'doing perfectly normal human social things is completely unacceptable and selfish' days are numbered to be honest.

This. It’s been two years almost. I don’t think people should have to miss out on their social life, I’m more concerned about how responsible people are afterwards I.e. using lateral flows, testing/isolating when they have symptoms, particularly if they’re going to be around vulnerable or elderly people.

Superstar22

It's fewer doctors, beds, ambulances etc not less.

You sound utterly joyless and ridiculous quite honestly.