I'm an ex ITU nurse and I don't want to go back

[MozzchopsThirty]

I know I am totally BU
And I could care for a vented patient
And the guilt is awful

I've been out of there for 8 years and there is talk amongst our management of redeploying staff with ITU experience

But I don't want to go
I don't want to risk my own health and my family's health by working long hours in a stressful environment with not enough protection

@midnightOK - care to declare what you do for a living?

I guess my thoughts are what will you say to those caring for your loved one on ITU if they need care as time goes on in this crisis? Why is anyone else's family less important than yours? None of us is keen to risk our lives as you can see on the NHS boards. You would get short shrift voicing that opinion in my service. We all value each other and our families equally. No one is expendable.

In our service the contract is across the service where needed and therefore anyone not willing to be redeployed is going to be put through disciplinary unless they meet the vulnerable criteria themselves.

It's not that you should like it of course.

If you have come off the register in the past three years they will re register you with minimal paperwork if you want to. But it’s a personal decision, the nhs needs everyone at the moment. You cold help as a HCA or nurse in a normal ward to free up staff?

I really feel for you, horrible situation. I presume all the people slagging you are volunteering as we speak to be cleaners etc at their local hospital.

30,000 Irish healthcare staff either working abroad or retired replied to #Be On Call for Ireland within two days. But they’re volunteering. Are you saying you can be compelled to do this?

There will be people who jump at the chance and people who don't want to both ok

My daughter is an A&E nurse, she is on the front line and has no choice about going into work. They still have PPE though, yet reading some of the comments above staff on the acute wards do not have this and that is a real worry.

I am quite elderly (for acute nursing anyway) at 60 and work in a GP surgery. Prior to this job, I spent many years working in acute services, not ITU, but could certainly support ill people on the wards. Having had one hip done last year and now waiting for the other one, I suspect that after a few 12 hour shifts I would be sent home anyway, given current working conditions for acute care nurses.

If our CCG wanted to move GP nurses into acute services, I would consider this. It would have to mean working in a confined area looking after certain patients, without the usual amount of walking around younger nurses on a ward have to do. If such help were considered practical I would do it and I think many in my age group would also volunteer.

Whentheleavesfalldown

I am so sad to read your post. I was hoping it was just the health trust I worked in, and that things elsewhere were better. We were in dire straits before this even started, a back log of 16 patients waiting on trolleys and in ambulances on nights that were usually the quieter ones.

I want to be that nurse that does her bit, that goes the extra mile for patients. But you know, I also want to see my DC's grow up - they only have me. I have a duty to them too.

Every individual must decide - based on their own level of risk (health, age etc) and that of any family they could infect. This is a long game.

Many will be infected and recover and might feel more comfortable stepping in once they know they and their families have had it and survived. Or not.

This is only the first wave.

reading some of the comments above staff on the acute wards do not have this and that is a real worry

We had a suspected case around 3 weeks ago and were told to 'treat it like flu'. I mentioned then we only had a few masks left and very little hand gel - we still don't have any.

Yes. Don’t feel guilty. Your children need you.

Yes - only the first wave. Jesus. I honestly wonder how many NHS nurses have the MH reserves/ resilience to cope with all this long term, so many were already at breaking point. It's such a scary time.

@eyestightshut I work in university. I have friends working in NHS, not nurses, seem quite happy with their roles.

This must be a horrible decision to be facing.

I know I wouldn't have the guts to do it, OP. I was in awe of nurses before this, even more so now.

I understand the guilt but I think only you can weigh the balance of moral obligation to public/ patients and to your own family - we don't know your circumstances. I really really feel for you though.

I think you have to remember though OP, we and even first responders are ultimately trained to put our own safety first. That applies here too, it is your decision to make and no one should be guilt tripping you into doing 'the right thing'. As PP's have said, its has to be the right thing for you (I'm giving a lot of flowers out this eve, maybe I have gone soft in my old age...)

I read staff that had retired in the last three years are being recalled not longer (yet)

Don’t blame you. Eight years out, equipment will have changed etc. It might not be safe for you to.

I read staff that had retired in the last three years are being recalled not longer

We are not being recalled. We will be contacted by the Nursing & Midwifery Council and given the opportunity to join the Covid19 emergency register. We will have a choice as to whether we do so.

OP I wouldn't do anything you don't want to do. All this offering NHS workers free drinks is just window dressing. We need proper PPE, proper rest breaks during shifts, some kind of legal cover if things don't go well in the pressure cooker situation (don't think we won't get sued afterwards!) and some respect from the government which should be reflected in how they address their priorities.

Effie expresses my view very eloquently.

I understand.
16 years ago I’d have been right there, ready to do my bit. But right now I have 4 dc, one of whom is “vulnerable” and a “vulnerable” DH. I’m not risking them, though I’d be happy to risk myself.
I work in AED, but in a specialism that’s makes it much less likely I’ll be dealing with corona virus patients directly. Nonetheless the lack of PPE scares me (we don’t even have gloves, much less masks) and I’m relieved that now schools are shut I have no way of being able to work.

@EffieIsATrinket this is a bit OT from the OP but your post really struck me more than many of the others. It is so spot on. I’d like to thank you and all the other NHS staff members from cleaners up to consultants, for all you do as thats all I have to give. I come from a family of HCPs, myOH is a HCP and i have tried my hardest to show support but I realise that I have not done enough speaking out. I’ve listened to my parents ranting about lack of funding or increased hours or changes to contracts and I see my partner hiding his fear from our kids about what this virus could do to our family if he gets it... I’ve sympathised but I didnt do anymore. I need to do more for you and people like you. We all do. We all need to make demands of the government that they treat NHS staff better, that they equip them better, that they pay them better. We’ve all paid lip service in passing but now is the time to actually do more. What? I’m not sure but I’m thinking about it now and thats a start..

You are all amazing women and men and you need better than we’ve given you.

@Stompythedinosaur a family members trust has also told her the same thing. Go in regardless.

A close friend of mine was an ITU nurse for a while, she said that although it was very stressful and demanding she did feel very protected and very supported as part of a strong team

This is like our soldiers being sent into Iraq without proper body armour or reinforced trucks. Totally wrong.

Granted, I don't think anyone goes into nursing just for money. They (you) do it from a wish to do good.

But that doesn't mean the rest of us should take advantage of their (your) virtue. If you've had enough, no blame to you -- you've already done more than I have. And I do hope this crisis impels more public funding for our truly important public workers.

I work in a nursing home and actually use my acute skills regularly. I was an ITU nurse 25 years ago and I could care for a ventilated patient if I was given the relevant Up to date training . Am sure the general principles have not changed!!