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What's classes as non essential social gatherings? Can I still meet friends with my toddler?

231 replies

HotChocolatemarshmallows · 17/03/2020 06:12

We usually go to baby groups then for a coffee. Baby groups are now cancelled and I'm not sure I'm happy to go for a coffee now either, not sure I want to go to peoples houses either! So is a meet up for a walk safe?

Are people avoiding friends now?

OP posts:
HoffiCoffi13 · 17/03/2020 10:43

Yes that would be wise, MrsArchchancellorRidcully

whomovedmychocolate · 17/03/2020 11:02

I am on day 3 of isolation and my ex husband is obviously keen to see the kids who are quarantined with me (and all symptomatic btw). We have agreed next week he will come and sit in the garden a reasonable distance away - bringing his own drinks and snacks. No contact within six feet. The post is being delivered to a box on the doorstep and we are not accepting any visitors.

ShowYourself · 17/03/2020 11:02

@MrsArchchancellorRidcully

Yes, we’ve cancelled. It’s a shame but we will do what’s right and make the best out of it.

Wannago · 17/03/2020 12:45

Wannago the virus is aerosolised, it spreads in droplets of moisture in the air. Have a look at dr John Campbell on YouTube, he explains and references a study where a man got on a bus and infected someone sitting 4.5 metres behind him.

But distance does matter (and note that due to the physics of inertia, a stopping and starting bus is a different scenario to a non moving environment). It is important to understand which activities are more and less risky. The further away you are from another person, the safer you are. Which is why the hot yoga may be, if it is done in a safe way, at two metres apart, far less risky than having coffee, where the normal distance between people is less than a metre.
Now the government guidance is that even that risk, of going out at all, is too great for those who are vulnerable, the elderly and those with underlying conditions. That might be extended to those who are living with those with underlying conditions, For those who do not fit into either of those categories, what has been asked is social distancing (which you cannot do in a pub or restuarant, which is designed for close contact). It may however, be possible and a sensible risk to take to do hot yoga, if one is not in a high risk category, not likely now to meet someone in a high risk category (they are all at home), and a two metre distance is maintained. Far more sensible a risk than the coffee afterwards.

The "hot" bit of hot yoga might also be interesting. Some people seem to think that this virus doesn't like heat, and that we might therefore have a breather if /when we get a heat wave, while others don't think that is the case, and the summer will make no difference. If in fact the virus is not immune to heat, it might spread less and stay on surfaces less in a hot yoga class, assuming hot means over say 28 degrees, than out in the park, making it actually slightly safer, if the same distancing is maintained than outside.
If you ratchet all options up as maximum risk, then you prevent people making reasonable assessments and cutting down on more risky behaviours rather than less, because you have told them the risks are the same, even when they aren't. And you prevent them taking precautions (eg going to hot yoga but keeping far away), rather than saying it is all forbidden, meaning if they go, they are less likely to spread out.

Bouledeneige · 17/03/2020 18:22

How can something be essential to your mental health when you know it's putting other people's health and lives at risk? Unbelievably selfish and entitled. I have told my kids to behave as if they have the virus (and not to be complacent about the lower life risk they have). Because the risk of infecting others is risking their lives.

How does Mrs 'I must do my hot yoga and coffee' know she is not infecting someone who could then pass it onto a vulnerable person who dies?

By the end of this we will all know someone who has lost someone or we will have lost someone ourselves. Don't you care?

The tube is not packed - it is very empty. My son is still travelling into town for school and got a seat for the first time ever today. Because most people who can are now working at home. This is a pandemic FFS!

Stockpilinglove · 17/03/2020 19:11

Yes we have cancelled Mother's Day. I am a teacher and in the centre of germs all day long. I don't care if I get it (I'm resigned to it) but I do care if I'm a carrier and spread it to my loved ones. I've just cancelled seeing friends and just got a very short "ok, whatever you think is best" message back. Clearly they think I'm overreacting.

Bringringbring12 · 17/03/2020 20:28

@Bouledeneige

How does Mrs 'I must do my hot yoga and coffee' know she is not infecting someone who could then pass it onto a vulnerable person who dies?

But if she’s infecting someone by doing hot yoga and having coffee, then surely the person she has infected in the scenario you outline also is out and about, choosing not to self-isolate, so they know the risks.

If you choose to go about your business - then you know the risks.

So I don’t understand your point.

If this woman was knocking on the door of people who were self isolating, then I’d get your point.

Orange89 · 17/03/2020 20:51

@Bringringbring12

@Bouledeneige

*But if she’s infecting someone by doing hot yoga and having coffee, then surely the person she has infected in the scenario you outline also is out and about, choosing not to self-isolate, so they know the risks.

If you choose to go about your business - then you know the risks.

So I don’t understand your point*

I think the point is they are BOTH choosing to amplify the spread by not listening to government advice .

Orange89 · 17/03/2020 20:54

@Stockpilinglove

I've just cancelled seeing friends and just got a very short "ok, whatever you think is best" message back. Clearly they think I'm overreacting.

I’ve had the same response from my friends

AdoptAdaptImprove · 17/03/2020 22:51

This shows how important it is to dramatically cut down social interactions. Just do it, for the sake of the vulnerable people you care about. The government is hoping to keep the number of deaths below 20,000. (Seasonal flu kills an average of 8,000 per annum). It’ll only be possible if everyone takes some responsibility.

What's classes as non essential social gatherings? Can I still meet friends with my toddler?
NaturalBornWoman · 18/03/2020 08:59

If you choose to go about your business - then you know the risks

This is why people will actually have to be locked in. Too stupid to understand. I despair.

SunshineCake · 18/03/2020 13:41

If that was aimed at me @Bouledeneige address me instead of throwing accusations around. I wouldn't have gone if I thought I was putting anyone at risk. I am staying in now because the guidelines have changed, not because I think I have the virus. FS.

cindyhove · 18/03/2020 17:30

The quick answer is NO

PinkLipsDontLie · 18/03/2020 17:53

I have read some posts in this thread and I see some people behave like they reside a different planet, rules don't apply to them etc.

In Greece we acted relatively early, it has been a week all schools are shut. We have also shut restaurants, shops, gyms, churches, businesses, every bloody thing. Only super markets, bakeries, food shops (home delivery only) and pharmacies are open. Nothing else. There is a restriction already in how many people are allowed per square meter in the super market, you don't just go in, you have controlled entrance.

And here as well you can find idiots that gather outside in the sun, ok they may be with one other person each, but in the end there's a crowd! Result? The police have started patrolling these places and telling them all to stay the fuck inside.. We all expect an even more strict lock down, as some people just need the army to tell them to stay away from others for a few weeks.

Mary54 · 18/03/2020 17:54

‘Non essential’ will obviously mean different things to different people. But the aim is the same to reduce contact and therefore new infections. Common sense would suggest that if you meet one person, you are also indirectly meeting all the bugs they’ve been exposed to. Including those that may have been brought home from another household member’s workplace, school, visit to friends etc.
While lack of social contact is tough on those caring for babies and toddlers ( and not just them), putting your child’s health at risk seems rather selfish.
Just in case the point hasn’t already been made, the reason flu etc decrease in summer is not temperature related. Apparently ( Robert Koch Institute) it has to do with people being out in fresh air more ( not being sitting targets for viruses) and uv light from sunshine is good at killing some viruses

Lincolnfield · 18/03/2020 18:04

@turdtimelucky - you really do have mental health issues don’t you? Your aggressive postings seem to be an attempt to conceal your fear and anxiety. Please try to stop goading people.

I’m a palliative care and surgical specialist nurse recently retired. I’m currently doing night shifts at a local hospice because they are short staffed. I’m not going out and about because I’m in bed during the day 🙂.

Try and get some support from either telephone or on line services. I think you need some kindness.

EssexBint · 18/03/2020 18:21

Seriously?! I am assuming you never finished your education! Will you die if you don't meet up with a bunch of silly wimmin to drink coffee and compete to see which baby has the biggest toothy-tooth?

You know what? I'm done. Go. Seriously all of you go and meet up. You can all catch the virus and sit and wonder in your half-wit brains how you all got so ill and I feel sorry for any at-risk relatives you come into contact with .... INCLUDING YOUR OWN BABIES!

Toomuchtooyoung01 · 18/03/2020 18:27

What are peoples thoughts on a wedding?

LoudBatPerson · 18/03/2020 18:33

Weddings are non essential. Lots of people, often older family members (and other vulnerable people).

I wouldn't attend a wedding for the foreseeable (not would I go ahead with one if I had one planned).

day1intheisolationhouse · 18/03/2020 18:36

What are peoples thoughts on a wedding?

Do you really have to ask?

No, definitely not.

If it's yours, do you really think your guests should risk their lives or the lives of their elderly family members or neighbours to attend your wedding? Because that's what you're asking.

You can probably arrange to go ahead with the actually getting married bit without guests.

If you're a guest, don't bother, the "happy couple" need to face up to the reality of coronavirus. A wedding is not essential.

Her1mum · 18/03/2020 18:37

For crying out loud, how can meeting up with friends be regarded as essential? People like the OP eho just don't get it are really worrying!

midwestspring · 18/03/2020 18:45

What are peoples thoughts on a wedding?

Weddings are social gatherings.

MrsWooster · 18/03/2020 18:48

Whoever said Mrs HotYoga would only infect others who chose to be out and about: surely the idea is that all of us who CAN distance ourselves, in order to protect those who CAN’T-obvious ones like NHS workers and also the ones who aren’t getting such support, like bin men, shop assistants et al. The more space around them, the safer they are and the flatter the curve.

JerryGiraffe · 18/03/2020 18:56

Halve your contact, halve your risk. I would absolutely not have social contact you don't need. It isn't just about us as healthy individuals it's about the risk to people who are more vulnerable. Schools and colleges are closed at last. Don't risk it

Orange89 · 18/03/2020 19:06

@JerryGiraffe & @MrsWooster

EXACTLY

I’m sure some of my friends think I’m weird cancelling our plans. Even though they no I have a parent vet 60 with underlying health issues.. True friends? Hmm

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