Gift for a dementia grandparent

[CoffeeHungry]

Anyone got any idea on what to get a grandparent with dementia for Christmas?

We are in the process of moving him into a home at the moment.

No picture frames as he has loads of pictures of all the family old and new everywhere! And I got him pictures of my children in a frame for his birthday last month.

He is really far into dementia, he doesn't remember me sometimes and will call me by my mums name or by my siblings name at times. He can't cook for himself ( has careers come in for meal times) and his careers also help wash him, he dosent do any housework (he would be confused if you ask him where the hoover is) I just think anything I buy him he would put somewhere and forget about it, he often puts things in odd places and alot of stuff goes missing and found weeks on in random places. My mum jokes that the only thing he remembers is where the biscuits and cakes are kept!

My dad loved this too, til he got too far gone.

I'm another who thinks if biscuits and cakes ate things he remembers they are things that are important and give him pleasure so buy him his favourites

Biscuits and cakes are perfect - he likes them and you can share them together. There's more joy in a nice packet of biscuits than a lot of other things at Christmas.

Best thing I ever got my gran when she had dementia was a book of old photos of her town. She spent hours looking at it!

I feel for you, I struggled to find things every year, didn’t help that her birthday was Christmas Eve!

Handmade gifts and pictures from the children (or you). The thought means more than the gift to them x

TBH by a certain stage my DM was no,longer aware that it was Christmas and very much unlike previously!) wasn’t remotely interested in presents, unless they were chocolates. I used to buy her something she could do with as well, e.g. a cardigan (had to be machine washable and tumble dryable once she was in a care home) with big buttons and pockets, or a new cosy dressing gown (belt had to be stitched on or it’d go missing)

That made me think of this song.

My Mum had a radio that she had on all the time in her room, when she was bedbound near the end, she loved listening to it.

A doll as she was always looking for her children, so this settled her down if he is always looking for something/someone try and get a toy alternative, it worked so well with my Mum.

Something to twiddle\fiddle with like a twiddle blanket.

I did a scrapbook with pictures of all the family and a family tree as they do forget who you are, and it also helped staff members and it engaged my Mum, I included pictures of her parents as she was insistent that I was stopping her going to see them and stopping her going to school so older pictures were included, (she thought I was her parent at one stage)

Food - anything they like, soft drinks as they do forget to drink and most end up with a UTI, when you visit make sure he drinks loads while you are there as staff are so busy sometimes it gets overlooked, I used to take my Mum cartons of Ribena or milkshake and she used to really like that even though she never drank it before she got ill.

Slippers make sure they are ones that can be taken off and put on easily.

A blanket with pictures on for his armchair.

A cardigan, make sure it can be tumble dried.

Toiletries are always welcome.

Make sure everything is named as they wash everything, and you do end up with other resident's clothes.

I know you asked for gift ideas, but I thought I would add some ideas of what helped my Mum as it is scary for everyone, My Dad had to learn to not argue back when she said something and just agree as she would get so upset, I got used to being called all different names and just answered her, she even called my DH carrot once instead of his name.

Some really great ideas here. Often people with dementia can access some happy memories through sensory things. Do you know what soap they used to use for example.... some lily of the valley or Tar soap could help their new unfamiliar surroundings feel familiar.

Honestly? If biscuits and cake are his thing, why not pledge to visit regularly and supply said treats? My fil has dementia and each time we visit we take a packet of his favourite biscuits, and every time he looks delighted and declares that they are his favourites!

We sit by him and hold his hand, or sometimes we have a singsong of songs he knows the words to (he has always been in choirs) and he will join in.

Toys with big easy to manoeuvre pieces, megabloks, duplo, kapla for building towers. Dolls and pet replicas.
Those bead things kids love at the Dr's. Where you push the bead up and over the wire.
An instrument if they ever played when younger.
Biscuits and chocolates if that's what he enjoys.
DGD liked looking at old pictures of the town he lived in and his war ship he served on.

@GettingStuffed my late Mum loved this book when her dementia meant she found following stories difficult https://www.amazon.co.uk/Meow-Book-Happiness-Lovers-Animal/dp/192582022X/ref=ascdff192582022Xnodl?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=375506194706&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=12911752941509089403&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1007432&hvtargid=pla-830217062600&psc=1&th=1&psc=1&tag=&ref=&adgrpid=79766931994&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvadid=375506194706&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=12911752941509089403&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1007432&hvtargid=pla-830217062600&dplnkId=d8406b43-3941-4787-8654-4450a6c468eb (oh sorry what a horrific link)

Also we got all the old family photos (including pets) and had a photo book made with simple captions (just the names) which she loved and helped her have conversations with carers

The window bird feeder was also a huge hit, as was a toy cat, and lots of sweets, chocolates and biscuits

A life story book!

I’m a nurse and did an essay on them during my undergraduate training. It’s basically a book telling their life story and filled with pictures and memories. The dementia patients in the articles I read were shown to really benefit from them. Also if they have carers it’s a way for their carers to get to know them better.

Otherwise I’d agree with others and say anything twiddly to keep their hands busy.

Also a portable radio is always very useful, especially if they ever need to have any inpatient hospital visits.

Can I just say thank you for the recommendation for the stuffed realistic toy cat recommendation. We bought one for my mil and she absolutely loved it. We bought one that was similar colours to our cats.

Just need to make sure fil keeps it out for her as he thought it was a bit odd despite the fact that we'd already explained what we were getting her.