NHS told me I wasted my time taking my child to hospital.

[Lililoox]

Yesterday afternoon I called 111 for some advice as my daughter was slightly struggling to breathe and she had a bad cough similar to what she had in December when she had RSV and Bronchiolitis and had a 2 night hospital stay. I was told to take her to a urgent treatment centre which I did and the doctor who saw her said they would like her to go back to the hospital and he confirmed it was Bronchiolitis most likely caused by RSV again but the hospital would be able to do the swab to confirm. Fast forward upon arrival to the hospital the nurse at triage was lovely, she said my daughters ribs were sucking in and to take her round to paediatrician ward. They done her observations and her SATS were sitting at 95 which they were happy with. They said to go back to the waiting room for the doctor. My daughter then had a feed and vomited it back up pretty much straight away which again, is what she was doing in December when she was admitted. She is such a smiley playful baby even when she’s poorly. She was even happy with an NG tube in her throat in December, it’s just how she is. The doctor came round, her SATS were now at 93/94 which is apparently ‘very good’ and listened to her chest. He confirmed Bronchiolitis and said RSV swab is only done if child is admitted. My daughter was happy and smiling at the doctor and he said ‘I’m happy with how she is, she is happy and playful which shows she’s healthy so I have no concerns, to be honest it was a waste of time you coming here, there was no need”. I was completely taken back! My daughter had vomited after her feed, struggling with her breathing, and belching when coughing, and they think that’s wasting their time? They said to come back if she presented further symptoms but to be honest I’d rather drive the extra and take her elsewhere next time. Am I stupid to feel she’s been neglected or am I taking it the wrong way as she’s my baby? Thankyou if you got this far

Sounds like a communication breakdown. You were also tired looking after an unwell child -all very stressful.

Children go downhill very fast, she may have been more unwell earlier but because of the awesome job you are doing looking after she is feeling better.

Never a waste of time getting kids checked out even if it’s for reassurance. If you are worried again even in the next 12 hrs then take her up again. You are your child’s advocate!

Also, ask for specific advice of when to take her back up e.g fever if 40, no wet nappy for 8hrs because it’s so hard to be objective as a parent.

Hope LO feeling better now.

It sounds like her condition improved a bit while she was there. I can only guess that the vomiting dislodged some phlem and eased her breathing. Therefore her sats improved. He can only go by her presentation and I am sure the comment wasn't criticism of you, more the advice you were given. Obviously continue to monitor her but I'm not sure what else you wanted him to do. Her sats were good, she seemed happy and alert at that point.

I think he meant there was no need for the other medical departments to pass you on

It is reasonable to respond to the Dr I am sorry you feel I wasted my time but I hope you understand that I will never consider getting my baby checked if I am worried a waste of my time.

Drs are human. I believe in some circumstances the wording they use is not ideal however, instead of escalating it address it at the time with the dr and if they still reply in a way that you feel is demeaning then consider taking it further.

You did the right thing, you sought and followed advice before going to a&e. Maybe the doctor worded it badly but I can’t see he meant you were wasting his time.
As a mum I would have been worried. The doctor wasn’t so hopefully that is reassuring.
I hope your little one is improving and is soon completely better.

It’s not unknown for doctors to get things wrong. And I’ve heard a very experienced doctor say that a mother will almost always know her child better than anyone else, and should trust her instincts if she feels that something’s wrong.

111 told you to take her in and logged it.
Social services would have been called had you not done so.

The doctor is a twat. Even triage sent her for further checks.
I would complain about how he spoke to you and explain it as you have done to us here.

See if there’s another hospital a bit further away that is a bit better. We have a hospital nearest to us that used to have a good reputation for pediatrics (bad for everything else, but good for pediatrics). Until it didn’t. I now have another go-to hospital, further away, it is not too bad it seems. I’m jinxing it probably haha

They actually have a term in medicine for babies and toddlers who seem happy but still have bronchiolitis/viral wheeze - they call them “happy wheezers”. You did the right thing taking her in. My friend’s daughter was once admitted for oxygen despite the fact she was running up and down the waiting room laughing.

The doctor needs to work on his bedside manner. You were there under medical advice from other professionals!

Babies go downhill very quickly with bronchitis. You did the right thing. Our baby has been admitted once for similar because the doctor listened to his breathing on the phone when we called 111 and sent an ambulance. By the time he got round to seeing a doctor he was much better. Other kids we know have continued to go downhill and ended up in intensive care.

I had to rush my two year old to A&E twice last year due to moderate-severe croup. The second time was horrendously hard on her little body.
I had a couple of drs and nurses tell me that just because they are happy, moving around or even a little playful, that doesn’t mean that they aren’t unwell. Their adrenaline usually kicks in because of the unusual environment and people.
Im not sure whether he’s a dick or it was just a poorly communicated comment, but you definitely didn’t do the wrong thing. So don’t let him get to you. It’s always best to air on the side of caution with our little humans, they can’t tell us what’s wrong

I have a toddler and a baby and both of them have had many episodes of bronchiolitis and viral induced wheeze, with several hospital stays ranging from just a night to a week. They get it from any respiratory virus, not just RSV.

It is terrifying when you see your child start pulling in and you did nothing wrong by seeking medical advice. The issue is GPs will often send you in to A&E when there’s some mild pulling in because they think any pulling in is serious. Whereas paediatricians accept some pulling in is fine, as long as it’s not too much, oxygen levels are fine, etc. And it’s a really hard balance for you to get right as a mum but it’ll come with experience and you’ll start to realise when it’s an episode you can just monitor them at home or you need to go to A&E. There isn’t really a middle ground for either GP or UTC with this - it’s either mild enough to monitor at home or they need to go to A&E.

I can’t say whether he meant you wasted time in a critical way or not but don’t take it personally. He’s either got no people skills, in which case that was unpleasant, or he was critical of the other doctors for sending you there and not you (as I say, inexperienced doctors will send you to A&E when A&E isn’t needed.

Also, just to add that it might not be RSV if she had it just two months ago. My children have had bronchiolitis from the common cold. We’ve had phases for both of them where we’ve had to be admitted for a night or two every couple of weeks and it was never RSV on any of those occasions. So a swab doesn’t really mean anything so I wouldn’t worry about that at all. In my experience, they only swab when there’s an admission.

Sending love - it’s a really stressful thing to go through!

What the Dr said was awful. When I have had to go to A&E with my child, the Drs have always said they would rather be cautious (not once has anyone said it is a waste of time). Please complain about the Dr to PALs.

I’ve heard this several times when we’ve been in A&E with the same issue. There are definitely doctors who emphasise that they need to listen to the mums as mums know their child better than anyone.

I read that as “we’ve wasted your time” by telling you to come in here rather than “you’ve wasted our time” - sounds like he was trying to reassure you that she’s fine and there’s nothing to worry about, she doesn’t need to be in hospital.

Recent F2 rotation possibly? Or just plain poor communication skills. Poor communication that upsets the customer, or where the NHS is concerned, the patient, is not tolerated in any other sector.

A doctor did this with my then 3 month old baby. Sent us home. I knew something was wrong and went back a few hours later. The nurse took one look at him and took him off me, his 02 level was below 80 and he ended up in HDU for a long time. I'm still so angry at that doctor

*NHS told me I wasted my time taking my child to hospital. *

One consultant or A&E Doctor told you .
Not "the NHS"

And yes some NHS staff could have better ways of communicating . But it is difficult to gauge as every interaction is different .

I heard a Ward Doctor say to an elderly lady (in a high pitched sing-song voice)

"Oh hello Martha , I;m Milly , the Doctor . You came in yesterday and were quite poorly" like she was speaking to a 4yo .

Omg this makes me so angry as a medical professional oxygen saturation of anything lower than 96 is not good. You should complain to pals the hospital patients liaison service or if you feel it adequate to than get in touch with the CQC it's the governing body of care. Hope your little one is well soon xx

this is my read too

It’s also possible that he was fine when the doctor reviewed him but not a few hours later. Small children can deteriorate so quickly with this. One of mine was 2 months old when he had his first episode and when we arrived in hospital, he wasn’t unwell enough to be placed in the urgent queue and his sats were normal. Two hours later it had dropped to 85 (separate point but I could tell he was getting worse and I went up to the nurse several times and she kept dismissing me without even taking a glance at him. That I followed up with a complaint).

Similar experiences a couple more times, where sats were fine on arrival but had dipped several hours later. They just deteriorate so quickly.

Perhaps he should be telling his colleague who sent Op there rather than Op!

I really, really think you’ve misunderstood the context of this. I don’t think the doctor was at all saying YOU wasted THEIR time.

It sounds like he was saying, “Sorry YOUR time has been wasted. It looks like we didn’t really need to see her here.” You went to hospital as you were told to do…he’s saying, sorry you were told to do that and it’s ended up being unnecessary. That’s all.

I would have just said, "Well 111 and another doctor both separately told me to come here, so you're outnumbered."

I thought you said her sats were 95%?