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Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Children's health

Ds still bed wetting at 10 years old.....Help please

37 replies

AnyoneForPimms · 26/01/2011 21:48

I hope someone here can give me some help or advise.
My ds who has just turned 10 is still bedwetting once or twice a week. He is very upset and embaressed about it and his younger sisters tease him. I feel really terrible but I just don't know what to do for him.
I really want to put an end to it not just for me who has to do the washing but for him.
Does anyone have any advise or have you been in the same situation? Please

OP posts:

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VoluptuaGoodshag · 26/01/2011 21:50

I feel for you, and him. I just posted another thread as am about to embark on the bedwetting alarm for my DD who is 7. Has your DS tried one?

geraldinetheluckygoat · 26/01/2011 21:51

I haven't been in the same situation but I just wanted to answer your thread. Have you been to the doctor/been referred to the clinic about it? Poor ds, and you, it must be a worry. Has he tried an alarm/being woken to use the toilet after he goes to bed?

I am positive that someone will come along with some good advice for you in a minute

jooseyfruit · 26/01/2011 21:58

get to gp and ask for referral to enuresis clinic

Eric website a good resource.

my dd still bedwets at 10 and a half.

there's a good book called stop bedwetting in 7 days, by Alicia Eaton (I think, will double check name). we tried this with dd and it really seemed to work.

good luck and he will grow out of it.

AnyoneForPimms · 27/01/2011 06:46

Thank you for all your advise so far especially jooseyfruit
I've had a very quick look at the video and will have a look at the info when everyone is at school. Looks like just the help I am looking for.
I just want to help him xxx

OP posts:

jooseyfruit · 27/01/2011 15:49

link to book here. good luck.

AnyoneForPimms · 27/01/2011 15:53

You been really helpful, thank you xx

OP posts:

Ooopsadaisy · 27/01/2011 15:57

Go to your GP - they are not interested until age 7 but your ds is 10 so he can be referred.

Poor lad - it's important for his self-esteem to get this sorted.

Butterbur · 27/01/2011 16:01

DS2 wet the bed almost every night until he was 13. We tried the alarms, and they would work for a few months, then he would gradually relapse (they worked for DS1 though).

I finally dragged him, kicking and screaming to the GP, when he was about 10. She sneered a bit, and said he would grow out of it and there was nothing to be done. I had to insist on a prescription for desmopressin, which at least guaranteed him driness for school trips and sleepovers.

He was beginning to despair about what he obviously saw as his dirty little secret when the tide turned, almost overnight, and he began to be dry.

I hope you get more help and sympathy than we ever had, but even if you don't, almost all children do grow out of it by puberty.

GrimmaTheNome · 27/01/2011 16:04

Do what joosey said. My DD was a bedwetter till she was referred to the enuresis nurse in yr3 -it took a few months but (bar the occasional mishap) all fine now. It is not unusual for junior age children to wet but by that age you should definitely get a referral.

There can be a variety of causes, and therefore different approaches to treatment, you really do want expert help.

Good luck!

Ooopsadaisy · 27/01/2011 16:06

Butterbur - your GP's attitude is disgraceful. Ths sort of thing can seriously affect a young lad's self-esteem and lead to all sorts of psycological (SP???) and social problems, including sexual repression and mental health deterioration.

OP - stop at nothing to get your lad's situation resolved and support him and love him all the way.

GrimmaTheNome · 27/01/2011 16:11

She sneered a bit, and said he would grow out of it and there was nothing to be done.

that's appalling! Bad attitude, bad advice. There's plenty that can be done - in my DDs case it was mainly drinking loads in the day and then 'programming' herself to wake in the night.

Butterbur · 27/01/2011 16:16

Wasn't our usual GP, but was a regular member of the practice. I never said anything. I was just so pathetically grateful to have got an appointment.

DS was very down about it and it did affect his self confidence hugely. There was a noticeable improvement in his well being when it finally resolved.

jooseyfruit · 27/01/2011 16:24

your poor ds Butterbur. glad he's all sorted now.

SauvignonBlanche · 27/01/2011 16:30

DS did this almost every night until he was 13. Stopping did seem to coincide with the arrival of his first pubes!
He still takes Desmopresin and it sounds as if your GP should be trying this with your DS and refering him to an enuresis clinic.
It's very common, make sure you don't get stressed by it and you'll get there, in time.

GrimmaTheNome · 28/01/2011 19:41

It's very common, make sure you don't get stressed by it

that's actually very important. Part of what helped my DD was when - apart from helping with the practicalities of laundry - I butted out as much as possible!

AnyoneForPimms · 30/01/2011 14:47

Thanks for everyones help and advise.
I am really patient with him and never get stressed although the washing is a pain.
I will make that appointment x

OP posts:

clarie · 01/02/2011 23:32

My 2 DSs had this problem, 10 and 7, I have cut out all artificial sweeteners (just found out I react to them) and it has completely cured DS1.

DS2 not having wet beds either but can be found sleep walking around with wet trousers, took some working out but I watched him the other night and he forgets to pull his trousers down... bless him we have asked him to pull his trousers down and sit on the toilet at night now............ 1 week later no wet trousers.

Hope he gets sorted quickly.

P.S My DD aged 4 loved teasing them too, she's been dry at night since 3

AnyoneForPimms · 02/02/2011 22:17

What do your ds 1&2 drink?
Do you mean just artificial sweetness in drink or food or both??
I'm willing to try anything

OP posts:

MoreSpamThanGlam · 02/02/2011 22:27

I thought my son would never grow out of it but I read somewhere that95% grow out of it by the age of 14% and unless they are wetting during the day then the likelyhood is so will your son.

My son is almost 12 and only last year did he suddenly stop wetting the bed 2 to 3 times a week.

Your lovely son is not alone, he really isnt. Just reassure him that he has at the very most a couple more years to put up with it. In the meantime, no more drinks after 7, a big sit down wee before bed and plenty of early nights, especially if he is sporty. My son is a very heavy sleeper and that is often the problem.

Dont fret too much

notnowbernard · 02/02/2011 22:32

Go to GP and explain

Ask for referral to eneuresis clinic

They will be fab, he may get meds prescribed (dd is on them and THEY WORK!)

They also give lots of great advice/strategies/tips

MAIN TIP: Drink, drink, drink. 6-8 cups of water or squash a day (avoid dark coloured drinks) No drinks 1hr before bed

And his sisters need a talking to, IMO

Good luck!

notnowbernard · 02/02/2011 22:34

Oh, and Wee/Teeth/Wee

Make sure he does a wee just before going to sleep. Make it be the last thing he does before shutting his eyes for the night!

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 22:38

Yes definitely go and explain - DS1 (10) still wets.

We've tried the alarm, we've tried the meds (they didn't make a blind bit of difference ), plus every other trick in the book (or by the clinic.......and MN).

He seems to be improving - a bit - maybe 3 or 4 wet nights a week instead of every night. But it's tough.

Agree you need to talk to his sister, it's no fun having younger siblings that are dry at night when you're not. DS2 was dry at night at 3 1/2yrs (with absolutely no effort on my behalf at all). And after a few tries at teasing his brother I made it clear that wasn't acceptable.

Not sure yet which way DS3 will go (he'll be 4 in may - still in pull-ups at night - because I haven't tried taking him out and he's not asked).

Oh - as well the the drinks thing mentioned above - the clinic told us

Wee - teeth - wee.

Apparently it's to help make sure they've proerly emptied their bladder, so they do a wee before bed, brush their teeth, then do (or try and do) another wee.

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BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 22:38

haha - notnow - x posts with you there

notnowbernard · 02/02/2011 22:44

Baroque

Sorry the meds didn't work for DS... but glad it seems he's 'growing out of it', as it were

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 22:46

well - like I said he seems to be.

He managed his YR4 residential with school without too many issues (helped greatly by the fact that by pure co-incidence once of his close friends also still wets the bed - so they had each other for support and to help doing the discreetly replacing bed sheets stuff).

I'm hoping he's grown out of it more by September - as he'll be off on his YR6 residential

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