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Original poster

Childminder asking me to drop her daughter to work

29 replies

theactual · 30/06/2025 20:41

Wasn’t really sure where to put this.. My DD goes to a childminder 2 days a week. I usually collect somewhere between 4-5pm depending when my meetings finish.

Last week when I dropped her off she sprung on me that she wouldn’t be able to take her daughter to work as she would still have the other 2 children and it’s a faff loading them all in the car, so asked when I collected DD could I drop her to work. It’s about a 10 min drive from my house, not a massive diversion. I was a bit taken by surprise but just said yes that’s fine. Her daughter is 19 and works in a restaurant.

She’s just text asking if I can drop her daughter to work both days this week that I collect. I’m worried this is now going to become a ‘thing’. I was actually going to collect DD early tomorrow and take her to the beach.. but I don’t want her to be annoyed at me and therefore take it out on DD. (Though I know that’s probably unlikely).

How would you respond? I thought I was helping her as a one off..

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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Tootsyknickers · 01/07/2025 08:27

Flossflower · 01/07/2025 08:15

It was a while ago for me but I used to go to the dentist on a Saturday or my MIL came over for a couple of hours. It suppose it is OK if a baby or toddler is in a buggy but you can’t have them running round at the dentists and as I said I have never seen it.
Yes I have taken my children with me to the doctor. On one occasion when I had a hospital appointment for an xray, a man in his 70s was being told off for bringing his grandchild with him. He was asked who they thought was going to look after the child while he had his xray?

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Unfortunately, dentists in my area don’t work Saturdays. When I take the children they don’t run around the room, they sit and watch what’s going on. If I had a child that has a tendency to not listen and to race around then I would make alternative arrangements. I’ve been a childminder for many years and, touch wood, have never had to do that. The children are well behaved and always love getting a sticker from the dentist afterwards. Many parents have to take their children with them which includes me so I’m surprised you’ve never seen it before. Also, people wouldn’t necessarily realise I’m a childminder, they usually think I’m the parent unless the child says my name or I tell them. Not that I pretend to be their parent, people just presume.

pambeesleyhalpert · 01/07/2025 09:02

Overthebow · 01/07/2025 07:14

I wouldn’t want my DC being taken to the doctors for someone else’s appointment. To start with there’s lots of sick people in the waiting rooms, doctors usually overrun and may end up having to wait for half an hour plus, and then in the appointment the children would have to listen to sensitive information or things they shouldn’t really see. Fine for a baby but when they’re 2,3,4 it’s not really appropriate. I have 2 DCs and don’t take them for my doctor or dentist appointments.

Edited

You should. We encourage parents to bring their children to the dentist when they have check ups so they can get used to the environment and see it’s not scary. Likewise with drs. I always take mine mostly because I don’t have childcare but my daughter watched me have all my blood tests when I was pregnant and she was fascinated and not at all scared when she had to have one.

ShittyHottie · 01/07/2025 09:06

ChateauMargaux · 01/07/2025 07:21

I can understand that this is not convenient for you, the childminder was stepping outside of the relationship between childminder and parent by asking and that a 19 year old with a job should be able to get there under her own steam...

But a very small part of me wonders if this is how the village is supposed to work... helping each other...

Ok but the childminder isn't childminding OP's children to be part of "the village" - she's doing it for money as a commercial arrangement.

pinkyredrose · 02/08/2025 18:54

ChateauMargaux · 01/07/2025 07:21

I can understand that this is not convenient for you, the childminder was stepping outside of the relationship between childminder and parent by asking and that a 19 year old with a job should be able to get there under her own steam...

But a very small part of me wonders if this is how the village is supposed to work... helping each other...

Glad that it's a very small part of you.

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