What is the youngest aupair you have / would have?

[laura032004]

Starting to think about ap no.2 Doesn't seem two minutes since I was worried about no.1 arriving!

Anyway, I've started to get a few emails, but they've all been from quite young girls (18ish). What's your experience been with younger ap's, or why wouldn't you have one?

I know it's really going to vary from person to person. I would happily leave my two with my 18-year old sister, and left DS1 overnight with her (whilst in labour with DS2) when she was just 16 (and three-quarters!). However, I know much older people, that I would never leave them with.

Wondering if talking to their mum would be an option? However, English is my only language, so unless they spoke English, that would be a no-go anyway.

MrsR, not sure if I do!?!?

We've been lucky so far I think with our first ap. Yes, there are a few problems, but nothing major. I wish she was better with DS1, but she doesn't seem great with older kids. She's fab with very whingey & clingy DS2 who loves her. I thought it would be the other way around. Anyway, 2nd time, I think I'm going to concentrate on looking for somebody who loves kids, especially 4 year old boys who can sometimes be a bit trying . I can cope with everything else so long as someone can occupy them for 10 minutes. Our ap doesn't play with them at all.

I had a 19 yr old but only for 8 weeks extra help in the summer, I didn't let her drive the children, and she didn't have any sole charge care until about 3 weeks in when it was apparent that actually she was superfantastic and mature and trustworthy (and then it meant being left with eg 1 child for an hour or so while I nipped to the supermarket, not all four for the day!)

Sole charge - my usual rule is nobody under 23 which is the age I would have left myself alone with small children, looking back!

17 as long as they were responsible, could cook, clean and didn't argue back like some teenagers. older if i wanted a driver though.

Peahead, that's because Americans are lovely.

PS How's the job?

QS in the weeks leading up to my APs departure she did less and less also, she took to not getting dressed until lunchtime and having 30 minute (I kid you not) long showers. She complained that there wasn't enought hot water!

She then put the emmersion on and forgot about it for over 24 hours (the oil boiler heats it twice a day, never had to use the emmersion before) it burnt through the thermostat and then expanded the boiling water back up to the cold water header tank in the loft and melted a hole in it.

Luckily I realised (there was hot coming out of the cold taps and all the loo cisterns were boiling) as we were about to leave the house and turned it off and emptied the cold tank out. If left it would have completely melted the cold tank, which would have flooded through the ceiling upstairs.

So far I have had to have a new header tank inc lid and jacket, a new innards of 2 loos (which melted/seized in the boiling water) a new emmersion element, timer and fused switch and an emergency call out fee - we are at just under £1k currently.

I'm considering never employing another!

OMG Maramaduke!!!!!!!
you never told me all that! makes my problems pale into insignificance! I'm now without AP have you seen my thread?!? x

marmaduke, to a lesser degree we had the same situation when ours was leaving. The last couple of weeks are a nightmare to deal with. You don't feel there's any point pulling them up on how they do their duties and they have nothing to lose by not doing them. Really hard.

marmaduke I am completely astounded.

dh wants to get another AP but, after yours and others experiences, I'm going to put the feelers out for an after-school Nanny. I'm not sure I can cope with another AP. It's a real shame as I've had some wonderful APs before but the whole "part of the family" onous seems to be lacking in the Au Pair environment at the moment.

Yes Brummie, now that ours has given notice what little initiative has completely flown out the window and she's asking me such stupid questions and doesn't understand my reply so why ask them??

MrsR, my DS' LEA is an 'old' AP (came over 5 yrs ago), she and her friends cannot believe the lists of demands that 'new' APs make. She also cannot believ how ill prepared they are to work (hard).

My recent AP was not at all interested in 'joining' the family, but admittedly she and I just didn't see eye to eye at any point!

I have a promising couple in the pipeline, but neither can start before May. I'm actually hoping, like you, that I can find a different way around my issues. I need to spend more time with DD, to do that I have to have someone half decent to cope with DS (who has sn) as he cannot just be parked in front of TV for 15 mins (or even 5!). Good luck finding an after school nanny.

This interesting, as none of you has said how old your children are. This has quite an impact I've found.