Hello. I'm looking for some honest advice here - from either nannies or anyone with experience of having employed a nanny.
We have a nanny for our two children, she's been with us for a good few weeks now. It's our first time having this experience so it's all new!
When we interviewed her, she seemed amazing - decades of experience and tons of ideas about activities she could do with the children to help their learning and growth.
We agreed that she would do the standard nanny duties of children's laundry, meals, and other regular jobs (e.g. weekly or fortnightly).
Three days of the week she has both 1 and 3 year old, and two of the days she only has the baby (nursery drop off for older one, but not pick up). Baby still naps, and also on days with the older one she gives her 'quiet time', so all in all I personally think there's plenty of time she has to be planning, having a break, etc.
So far it's not been what we expected, she hasn't been doing half the stuff we thought she would or have asked her to do.
Our gripes :
- She doesn't seem to be doing many structured activities really with either of the children. She has started taking them to some groups, so at least they'll get something out of those.
When home - with the baby 75% of the time he seems to be sitting amongst the same toys occupying himself whilst she cleans the kitchen or eats her breakfast/lunch. As for the toddler, 75% the time she's just wandering around entertaining herself or playing with the same toys that are already out.
What I would expect is, at a minimum, the nanny should get out different toys so they're getting some variety, and ideally, do at least one structured activity a day (she does maybe one a week).
- We don't seem to be getting the benefit of her supposed experience.
We'd expected her to be on the ball with developing both their skills, whether that's crawling / standing / spoon skills for baby ... or drawing letters, learning days of the week etc for toddler. But we don't think that currently we're getting any more for our money than if we'd employed a cheaper, less experienced nanny. E.g. I would have expected her by now to ask about whether we are thinking of transitioning the baby from milk between meals to snacks.. but nope no mention of it (of course I'm not WAITING for her to suggest it before I start transitioning, just surprised that she hasn't even mentioned it given her years of experience).
- She eats her breakfast and lunch at a different time to the children.
Now, normally I wouldn't dream of dictating when anybody eats, but it seems a bit off that she feeds the children, then leaves them to their own devices while she cleans the kitchen, and then further leaves them to their own devices as she then sits down to eat her own meal - when it's perfectly possible and normal to just eat at the same time as them.
She doesn't take massively long, but it's just niggling at me. I know, everyone needs a break, so maybe we're being too OTT and I'm prepared to be told if that is the case.
- She hasn't done any of the regular jobs that I had written down for her.
Examples are : deep clean high chairs every so often (instead of just wiping the tray), deep clean the baby bath every so often, wash the toddler's toilet seats every so often. Are those acceptable things to be asking her to be doing??
I know the day is only so long, and if it looked like she was trying and she genuinely didn't have time to be getting everything done, I'd understand.
But I just don't know what she's doing half the time except making herself look busy tidying the kitchen or sitting 'supervising' the children's play but not coming up with new activities herself.
Are we being unreasonable to expect her to be doing educational activities with the children?
I'm also wary of bringing stuff up as I don't want it to affect her relationship with us / the children.
Thanks for any advice!