Oh No, just been fired with no notice!

[NiftyNanny]

I don't think they're going to give me any notice pay, I wrote a letter when I started and said I wanted a formal agreement, I've only been with them 5 weeks and it hasn't worked out. Their little girl spent most of the time shouting at me that she "didn't want me" after her, she wanted her Mummy. "I hate you, I don't want you!"

Now, I tried to talk to the parents about it and asked what I could do to help her feel like I was part of the team - they had a chat with her once, and she didn't shout at me for a day so she was given a present for being nice. Well, you can imagine how long it lasted. She has them around her little finger - getting out of baths, etc by stamping her feet, and I think this has really swayed them.

The Dad is at home sick at the moment, and yesterday I had another short notice cancellation where she was going to go to a friend's house after school. I said I wouldn't stay just til 3, I'd keep going til I did everything. So, I went round, cleaned the floor in the kitchen, the bathroom, the toilets, finished the ironing and then Dad came home groggy having had his stitches out. He went in the bathroom and I forgot to put the shampoo bottles back on the side of the bath and straighten the curtains.

He was standing at the top of the stairs groaning when I called out that I was leaving, he'd answered a couple of sentences but didn't hear or something, and then I got a call an hour later once he'd woken up shouting at me that I'd done half a job in the bathroom and it wasn't good enough. He then called back another hour later once Mummy was home and said it wasn't working out, they weren't happy and it was "the final straw" - I didn't know there was a first straw!

I am in such a mess, I know I was stupid not to get a contract in writing but they seemed very reasonable, but I think the fact their little girl was so anti-me just me it obviously just went crack. To be honest I wanted to meet with them and have a review because I was so unhappy about how she was taking to me.

Rubbish! I am going to be so broke over Christmas, I'm going to look on Gumtree and Nannyjob for temp jobs but I don't want to be in the position where I'm being told "only light cleaning" then throttled for not replacing shampoo. I even srcubbed the toilets.... but he just shouted at me "I don't want to hear it, let's leave it at that and you can post the keys back through the letterbox"

One minute they were fine the next they hate me!

Grrrr, PEOPLE! Where are the NICE families?

It sounds like you are better off out of it TBH! Sorry you don't have work but there must be loads of temp work about at this time of year. Have you get family near by to spend some time with?

You're better off out of there. They wanted a skivvy obviously. Don't post the keys back till yo have all your money. Even if they don't pay you they'll have to get new locks and keys so will be out of pocket. People like them are disgraceful/

someone on here cant remember who has just had a nanny leave and is left in the lurch, think it was jura, maybe you can help each other

Are they paying you in lieu of notice ? It is a week even if no formal contract iirc, unless you have a clause stating otherwise.

which area are you in?

There are nice families around, so good luck with the job hunt.

Agree the contract BEFORE starting (I have done this for my last two jobs, and good families don't mind). Legally there needs to be a written agreement in place by end of 1st month.

Perhaps aim for a family where the children are younger. Personally I find pre-school children are much better at adapting to change, then school aged children.

Contact agencies over the weekend, so you can meet them early next week. Contact nursery agencies - I used to get several days pre/post Christmas work temping in nurseries, as their regular staff liked having days off over xmas period.

Good luck.

How horrible.
Write a letter detailing that they failed to give you the contract you asked for, and give them their keys back when they have paid you what they owe.
You sound so lovely, I'm sure the right family is just around the corner.

They hired you as a nanny and fired you because of shampoo?

I hate them. And agree about the keys. Actually I'd keep the keys. Just to worry them. Bastards.

Gawd what a crap excuse to fire you! Because it is transparently just that, an excuse.

Sounds like its been a bit stressful for all concerned because of the dd refusing to accept you and so on. Are you the first nanny they've had?

Then on top of that, if he's physically in a bad way, groggy from having his stitches out, etc, maybe the whole thing was a very unlucky constellation and can be sorted out and wound up amicably via a calm discussion on Monday or something. Does all sound very upsetting for you. Think maybe this is not a home you would be happy in even if they changed their mind. Don't you think?

and if you have no luck with jura, you can talk to me

Hey Niftynanny Jura is very nice (I've met her) and hardly mad at all, for a mner that is Go for it this might be a mn Christmas miracle

Just watch out for Jura because she has a thing about wee ...

Oooh, CATs sound good but I haven't paid any £5s.....

I like to think I'm quite reasonable and well balanced too!

Actually I have an interview tomorrow morning - but it wouldn't start until mid Jan, so I would be stuck for December. I will be VERY strict about getting things in writing, as I did ask about it and wrote a letter outlining what I wanted in terms of notice, holidays, min hours and so on (I will include job description with duties in the next one, too!) which they verbally agreed to, but he was so shouty at me that I am just... I don't want to have someone tell me that they "don't want to hear any of this, you just post the keys through and leave it at that"

I'm amazed, because they have always been sweetness and light up until that one phone call. Terrifying! I'm beginning to doubt my judgment now

Thanks for the tip about temping in Nurseries, that could be a great option, holiday cover.

Jura, I've mailed you...... I'd rather not post my email address on here as I don't want anyone saying that I'm being defamatory if they can identify me by name. Hmmmm.

I live at the border of Shepherd's Bush and Acton, by the way.... and I don't drive.

Isn't it funny how having a bad experience can really jolt your confidence. I'm going through a tough time in my new job that i started 5 weeks ago and you wouldn't know that the woman who interviewed me and who i now work for are the same woman!

Aww NannyJ I really feel for you. It seems you just can't tell how it's going to be with a family until a month in, until you have some kind of sixth Nanny-sense that kicks in....... I'm not there yet!

Thankfully I've been interviewed by a lovely sounding family who are VERY keen on things being formal, having an official trial period, a trial day as part of the interview process.... they seem so down to earth, straightforward and honest, I'm hoping that I'm not going to be wading through a minefield again.

I'm really crossing my fingers because I know it's a case of finding the right family.... I suppose as I'm still new - this is my first year "in the field" having finished my training year while I was at college... I am still learning about what I'm looking for too, my style of nannying and so on.

I could not have told that the kid was the one wearing the trousers I'm sure the family seemed nice when you met them too. Apparently she makes Mummy cry by shouting at her too. Who would stand for that from their 5 year old??

I'm sure you will make it work somehow, poor you though I completely sympathise.

Let us know how things go x

I've been nannying for nearly 12 years and thought i knew what to look for too. I asked all the right questions but sometimes what people say and what they do are totally different. Unfortunately i have enough experience to know that things are not going to change and at the end of the day they have the right to parent how they like it's not for me to say any different is it. It just means that i'm not the right nanny for them but the idea of having to move out of my flat ( I get a free flat with my job) and having to start job hunting again at this time of year does not appeal.

Good look NN in your job hunt

Did you go to Norland that you did a training year NiftyNanny? Or another private college.

Can I ask you NiftyN if being a non-driver restricts the jobs you can apply for? I know that nannies in Central London area may not need a car, but certainly in my area (just outside the M25 on Surrey/Berkshire border) a car is essential, else you are housebound.

Sounds like your interview went well - how soon till you expect to hear back from that family?

Sometimes you just don't know how a family are until you spend time with them. I accepted a job with a family who decided not to keep me on after a week. Their excuse was that I wasn't very hands on with their twins. The maternity nurse was still there and I couldn't get anywhere near them FGS. However they asked me to stay on for a month which I did. I think the real reason was they had promised part of the house which was self contained as my accommodation but I overheard the mother saying to their interior designer they were going to rent it out.

Nifty, if you want something temporary for the rest of December and are stuck for cash, I could quite easily use you here . The only problem is that without a car, it would be a bit of a journey (deep SW London) but let me know if you are interested .