Childminder's holidays

[cjm10979]

I toyed with the idea of putting this in AIBU, but thought I would get more relevant responses here.

We have a childminder to look after 2 DDs, one school age, one pre-school. I have known her for some time and is a good childminder with no complaints generally over the last few years of using her.

Around 85% of the children she regularly looks after are of school age. All the clients have different hours/days for the care, so no one family's requirements are exactly the same.

We have an all year contract and up to 6 weeks holiday for either side (some others do have term time only and pay a higher rate accordingly). During holidays for either party she charges 0.5 the usual rate. The problem is that the childminder mainly takes her holidays in term term. Her children are teenagers, 1 is about to go to uni and they get the grandparents to stay in their house when they are way. Our relatives are not close by/have their own health issues so we are not able to do the same when she goes on holiday. Additionally, some of the other clients are foreigners with no family in this country, so it's difficult for them to do the same.

I understand that she needs to take holidays and it not an issue with the 0.5 rate, it's just that we have to take holiday in term time to cover hers. Then we have hardly any holiday left ourselves to take as a family. We can only have 2 weeks & 1 day off together this year. I don't think we we be able to both take time off around xmas as we won't have enough. She is going on a 10 consecutive day holiday in September.

How do other childminders deal with this? I do think she is taking the piss a bit, given that 85% of the children & almost all the families will have at least 1 school aged child.

Oh right. It's one of those threads. Only interested in those who agree with you. I see.

My child minder takes all her holidays in term time as school holidays are when the parents tend to need childcare the most. She has children who only come in the school holidays. I'm in the same boat as you and end up using most of my annual leave covering her holidays. It's been an absolute pain. Ds starts reception in sept so things will be better as I reckon my 76 yr old dad could manage the school run whereas he couldn't have done full time care for a week! That will free my leave up for school holidays.

We can only have 2 weeks & 1 day off together this year

This is quite normal is it not?

Lots of parents split their leave through the year to help with childcare.

My dh works in a school and term time only. He is off all holidays. However my cm is entitled to take her leave when suits her so first week of the school term I am off because she is. I am taking one week off summer and the feb half term so dh I and the kids will have two separate weeks together. The rest is split because that is the way these things work.

Actually, I'm now only interested in parents' responses as up to now the childminder ones are generally not constructive

Ok, I'm a parent, not a CMer. I have two Dc and as I am a lone parent I have only one set of annual leave to us either to cover Cmer holidays. How do I tackle it? I don't "tackle" it, I fit in with it, because I chose to have children that require childcare. This is life with children. You can't seriously have expected to have 6 (or 12??) weeks annual leave to float about the house or the Mediterranean once you had children. Did you? if you really need that then you should hire a nanny.

Thank you, Justgivemesomepeace for acknowledging this as 'being an absoulte pain' (your words not mine).

Also, some people have got this impression i've said I want the CM to take all the holidays in the summer holiday, I haven't. A mix of 6 weeks throughout the year, with the majority (not ALL) in school holidays.

Also, I think people are also forgetting that the nearly ALL her clients have school aged children, if there was a mix of pre-schooler onlys and school aged then the pre-schoolers will be OK with it, but when almost everyone has school aged children then it means nearly all her clients will be disadvantaged by it. I don't even think the majority of us know about the holiday in September, it was just causally mentioned to me whilst talking about something else yesterday.

I didn't expect to take 6 weeks off on holidays, but I think it's reasonable to expect more than 2 TBH.

but I think it's reasonable to expect more than 2 TBH.

Then you have an unrealistic expectation of life as a working parent. Is this your child's first year at school?

I'm a parent of school aged children and I have been a childminder. I took time off when it suited me not to fit in with multiple clients different requirements. If this issue was a major one for all your CM's clients she would have a decision to make. But it's still her rules. If she's already lost a client over it then she's obviously decided 'hey ho' and carried on doing what suits her anyway. I don't think you're going to get her to change her mind.

To be fair I think the problem is the operation which I guess is going to be a one off.
My parents help each other out. I would try that.

The families with school age children will probably find it easier to cover term time holidays.

I found my ex CM's holidays / spa days/ early finishes unreasonable and would not use a CM again.

I think that finding a new CM is the only way forward. It seems fairly reasonable to me to want your childcare arrangements to allow you to take family holidays. But if your arrangements aren't doing that then you need to rethink them. You aren't likely to change your CM's set up if it works for her. There isn't much point complaining about it on here as it's what you signed up for.

It is much easier round here to find a holiday club to cover school holidays than to find someone to collect children from school for a couple of weeks, so I get why the term time holidays don't work for you.

I'm a childminder and because all my families bar 1 have school age children (including me) stipulate that 4 weeks leave will be during school holidays. If I take time off term time it is unpaid (& rare - we're talking maybe 5 days in as many years and3 of those were booked 6 months in advance as I have an annual commitment). I think the problem is assumption of your behalf - not unfairly imo - but the best option is finding a cm who suits your needs better as 12 weeks holiday will be beyond most families reach. And of course op can find alternatives but not if she's paying her existing cm

Your problem is that you don't want to "waste" your annual leave on looking after your own children.

For the majority of families, they will only have a couple of weeks off together each year, the rest of annual leave is used for childcare.

This is the reality of being a parent.

You have consistently ignored the only possible solutions which are to leave this childminder and find alternative childcare permanently, or to cover the cm's holidays yourself or shared with other clients.

You want people to tell you that you are right and you should challenge the CM and you're cross that people aren't doing that, because you're wrong.

It is a waste of annual leave to have to take it in term time when children are at school for most of the day if you could take it in the holidays and actually spend the time with your children.

OP - is there an after school club you could use instead?

I know you don't want to hear from CMs but ...

New parents I take on ask when I take my holidays. Nearly all the families I care for have school children and find it easier to find temporary care during the term time than during school holidays. I don't charge for my holidays (but charge full fee for parents holidays). I have taken a week during term time this year. Last year I took 10 days off during term time.

Parents are really happy I have been able to cover all the school holidays. I have booked a week in August next year and I am already being asked if I know anyone who can help them out.

I'm a parent who uses a childminder.. I have no issues about when she takes her holidays because this is what I signed up for when I chose to use her rather than a nursery. I think you are being unreasonable in expecting to be able to dictate when she takes her holidays. If you are not happy you should look for an alternative arrangement..

I think is a question you need to ask from your childminder before you book your child in. I agree that she can do what she wants as its her business, but it doesn't sound like it makes business sense so presumably she will lose clients.

You could ask if she has any arrangements with other cms to cover each other's holidays or if she would consider setting this up. Lots of cms have back ups of other local cms to step in if there is an emergency.
If not, she might know of someone looking to do some babysitting who could help out during holiday times.

A cm may have many kids all at different ages and different times during the week.
Now say for instance she has 7 lots of parents. How in the world is she supposed to organise her holidays around all of them?

Its pretty standard to sort your holiday around the CM holidays. I give my parents plenty notice of what holidays I will have during the year and they book their holidays/alternative care for those times.

THe CM is self employed, she sets her own terms and conditions. You agreed to these when you signed the contract. You of course can leave giving the agreed notice but you cannot dictate to this or another cm when they take their own holidays. CM take holidays to suit their own families just the same as everyone else. Why shouldnt they? It will be easier to get cover from friends or school clubs/nurseries/other cms during term time than in the holidays surely?

Saying you havent had holidays due to covering Cm holidays, erm they are your kids, why is it so much of an effort to actually take care of them? The reality of parenthood is that your kids are your responsibility, when they are sick and when there is no other childcare. Millions of parents have to juggle their holidays to cover childcare you are not unusual in the slightest.

The cm probably didnt relish the thought of being in hospital either and its probably not going to happen every year.

OP why are you being so aggressive in your replies?

You say you are going to ask the other parents if they will pay more so that she can take her holidays in the school holidays ! You are paying for a service, you cannot dictate when she takes her holidays. If her set up does not work for you then find another provider.

She is running a business, those are her terms, either put up with them or move.

You dont need to take your child out of school you just need to be there to get your child to school and back!

You dont need to take 12 weeks holidays off work, you just need to take turns at covering her holidays! Same as every other parent in the land.
You seem to think that you are entitled to take your holidays just for you to go on holiday and that the cm should take hers when you decide she should.

You are paying for a service, you cannot go en masse with the other parents and confront the cm to try to bully her into taking holidays when it suits you!

I'm sure between you and your husband taking a later start and an early finish for a week (or however long CMer is closed for) and making use of after school clubs, babysitters, other parents etc then you could manage it without taking annual leave for much of the time she is closed.

I have to say if I was a Cmer and found out one of my clients was approaching my other clients to try and pressure me to change my business terms I would give them notice.

Me too!