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Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Nanny Car Crash - what to do?

106 replies

ChocolateBiscuitCake · 02/03/2017 18:54

Firstly, she is okay (no children thankfully in car).

It happened on a country lane. Very narrow section that is notoriously difficult to navigate. Nanny stops when she sees an oncoming driver with horse box 20m away. Rather than stopping and pulling over early on (which she could have), the horse driver continues to the edge of nanny's car and insists nanny reverses - which nanny says she couldn't (not sure how true this is, but this is the version of events!). So after a war of words, horse driver ploughs forward and takes off the side of MY car.

Horse driver doesn't stop, until nanny runs after. No apology and I have been given the drivers name & number. I will call for the horse ladies version of events but, I wanted to check:

  • Who do you think is in the wrong?
  • How do I present this to the insurance company?
  • What happens if horse lady won't give her insurance details (her phone number suggests she lives in our village).
  • How do the insurance companies decide who is in the wrong?
  • How much is reasonable to ask nanny to pay for (she is on very good salary and lives in, so has no bills etc to budget for!), given there has to be an element of anger in this debacle otherwise it wouldn't have happened?? In my mind it was avoidable.

Part of me is furious at nanny as she should know that horse boxes are difficult to reverse so should have tried harder to reverse, regardless of whether horse driver was being unhelpful and difficult.

I am obviously furious that the horse driver has caused significant damage to an expensive car.

Any advise is much appreciated, please.

Off to find wine....

OP posts:
ChocolateBiscuitCake · 02/03/2017 21:21

Not dripping at all - I have mentioned many times that there was heated debate, cross words exchanged, hot headed, heat of the moment etc. To ensure no one thinks that I am making that up, I have simply added that she herself told me she was aggressive, rather than me assume she was.

I am really surprised how many people think I am unreasonable for being cross.

Carrot - that is exactly my concern - word v words and the insurers happily pay out to no one.

OP posts:
Wallywobbles · 02/03/2017 21:24

The fact that the horse box driver drove off makes them in the wrong whatever else happened. Police incident number and insurance. You need to stay out of it and do not be ringing the other driver whatever you do.

CharlieChopstix · 02/03/2017 21:35

Eh? This is all completely irrelevant who did what and when

You have INSURANCE. Your nanny provides all details to them with her version of events. The other person does likewise and then the insurance company take it from there

It's actually not down to you do be some sort of insurance detective here

CharlieChopstix · 02/03/2017 21:36

And you don't go calling the other party! Ever. Keep out of it

Topaz0117 · 02/03/2017 21:37

Yab hugely u!

Your nanny told you she couldn't reverse! Had she attempted to reverse and damaged your car she'd have been at fault and I'm sure you'd of been angry.

Poor nanny can't win either way!

AyeAmarok · 02/03/2017 21:42

Jiggly & 5more, yes bit harsh maybe. But if the nanny has intentionally got into a stand-off with another car because she decided that if the car gets damaged, we'll, it's not her insurance, then I'd be pretty annoyed about that.

Maybe if she had to cough up she'd be more careful in future, that's all.

Blowninonabreeze · 02/03/2017 21:45

I wouldn't assume that your insurance company will pay out on a no fault basis.

It will be nanny word against horse box lady. (assuming no witnesses)

I was incensed with my insurance company who accepted a 50/50 claim when a third party hit my stationary, parked car and pulled the door off. We had witnesses too (albeit impartial ones, - they were friends of ours)

JigglyTuff · 02/03/2017 21:48

It doesn't matter if the nanny was being a complete arse frankly. If she's insured, then she's insured. If the OP decides to take out inadequate insurance then it's her problem.

The nanny is an employee. Not a teenage kid.

It's my understanding of employment law that the OP needs to go down a formal disciplinary route rather than docking pay. AFAIK you can't do that in the 21st century with all its pesky employment laws

cestlavielife · 02/03/2017 22:43

How did you treat your h when he reversed into something? Presumably you accepted it as accident and the insurance paid tho you lost no claims/paid excess.
If it was nanny s fault in any way then it wasn't intentional and you would have to deal with it the same as when your husband crashed .
You have insurance.
That is what it is for.
It's annoying for sure.

Nongoddess · 02/03/2017 22:50

Golly, just from reading your responses I can see why she didn't reverse. I'd be terrified of scratching your car too...

tralaaa · 03/03/2017 06:13

I work in insurance tell the insurance company you will only have to pay the excess if you are found to be at or 50/50 - this may be seen as road rage on the horse box owner behalf

frayedbuspass · 03/03/2017 08:56

If, in fact, the incident happened as your nanny said, then her only fault was not immediately phoning the police to report a hit and run

Kr1stina · 03/03/2017 09:59

Apparently it's not an offence to hit another car and drive off, unless someone is injured. I discovered this when someone did this to me.

They have 24 hours to report it to a police station . It's only an offence if they don't do so.

The police tracked down the offending driver about four weeks later and suprisingly enough he denied it and the damage to his car had been repaired. So had to pay the excess for the damage to my car.

llhj · 03/03/2017 10:08

I'd be furious, essentially you're in this situation because your nanny can't use her judgement and has a stubborn temper. Fine if it was her own car but definitely not on as it's yours. I'd be having sharp words.

katieks · 03/03/2017 10:29

Let the insurance decide who pays what, if anything. If you have to pay the £1000 excess then hopefully the nanny will do the right thing (in my view) and offer to reimburse you at least some of it. I know I would if I were the nanny.

FinallyHere · 03/03/2017 10:37

If I were the nanny, I know what I would do. If I wasn't already, I would start looking for a role where I was respected, trusted and generally appreciated.

AQuietMind · 03/03/2017 10:40

If I were the nanny, I know what I would do. If I wasn't already, I would start looking for a role where I was respected, trusted and generally appreciated.

This.

FinallyHere · 03/03/2017 10:44

Goodness....

*she herself told me she was aggressive, rather than me assume she was.

I am really surprised how many people think I am unreasonable for being cross.*

She 'fesses up about her own moment of madness, and in return you get cross, distrust her story and want to hear the other's party's version. Interesting approach to staff management.

Another way would be to say, are you alright? Must have been awful for you, meeting such a driver in a tight spot. Oh, well, we all have bad days, good job we are all insured and earned yourself her undying loyalty.

greeeen · 03/03/2017 10:48

I can not believe people think this is an acceptable way to behave when driving your bosses car, or ever.

She would be out the door if she was my nanny, imagine if she had your children with her?! I say that as someone without a nanny so I appreciate they may be very hard to find and that would affect what you put up with. However, if a friend of mine suffered from this level of road rage I would not be allowing them to drive my children anywhere.

I would allow the insurance to deal with it and agree with pp who said if she has any sense of decency she will offer at least half of any costs.

sopsmum · 03/03/2017 10:51

Country lane with no witnesses will be knock for knock I suspect 50% liability each no body wins. Sorry for you what a nightmare. Don't make your nanny pay though that would be horrid of you.

TheOnlyLivingBoyinNewCork · 03/03/2017 10:53

this accident only happened because of pride and confrontation. If both parties had been sensible, it wouldn't have happened

Only one party hit a stationary vehicle and damaged it, and it wasn;t the nanny.

If she says she couldn't reverse, why do you not believe her?

PuraVida · 03/03/2017 10:54

Are you sure there was somewhere for her to reverse to? Do you know the road? if she'd just give around a sharp bend or there was no pulling over place where she'd just fine from but there was for the horse box then perhaps her stubbornness wasn't misplaced. We probably need a diagram

DianaMemorialJam · 03/03/2017 11:03

can not believe people think this is an acceptable way to behave when driving your bosses car, or ever.

Don't think anyone has said that... But there's no excuse for ramming into someone's car, pretty sure it would be considered criminal damage if she did it on purpose Confused

JoJoSM2 · 03/03/2017 11:31

Hopefully a good lesson learnt: don't give your nanny a car that you're extremely precious about and get proper insurance with lower or no excess.

Doglikeafox · 03/03/2017 12:30

Whether it was avoidable or not, you can't just plough on down the road hitting other people!
Horse box person should pay, not your nanny.

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