Nanny threatening with HMRC unless we give positive reference

[DRDG]

Hello,
We recently had a nanny work her probationary period and due to a number of issues we agreed to part ways. The nanny was disappointed, particularly as she seems to be providing financially for her family in her home country, and wanted to stay on until she found a new job. We declined but I offered to help her find a new job so I put the word out - I was quite happy to do so as she has some good qualities, she just wasn't able to keep up with our busy lifestyle and the ages of our kids also weren't a good fit for her. But I felt she could work well for another family.

The nanny is already interviewing with some families and asked if I would support her story, which basically is that we had agreed on a short term arrangement and that she wasn't asked to leave. I declined: I don't feel comfortable, also I don't feel that there is anything to hide, after all I was happy to recommend her. As she is interviewing with people who more or less move in our circles, it can't be excluded that they would eventually learn of the circumstances anyway, so far better to be upfront.

The nanny then told me that she will report us to the HMRC for having paid her cash in hand for her probationary period, unless we support her story and give her good references.

Add to this that since she left, I heard some very negative things about her from three (!) separate sources, concerning how she behaved around one of my children. Nothing abusive but also nothing I would approve of.

What do I do now? I clearly can't stand my my recommendation anymore, but it's so tricky to give a bad reference. I am assuming HMRC wouldn't care as we paid under the threshold amount, and we have always done nannytax for all previous employees, but as she seems to be on the warpath I wouldn't put it past her to sue us if a negative reference prevents her from getting her next job. At the same time I can't lie, so if I'm contacted for a reference (which hasn't happened yet) I will have to answer any direct questions truthfully. Any advice would be much appreciated.

I would say in light of the threat you will no longer be giving her a reference. She may go to HMRC, but then you'll have to pay a bit more tax (or not) not a massive problem, whereas explaining to friends why you gave a good reference knowing she wasn't great AND had form for blackmail would be much, much worse.

How much did you pay her?

What fatoldbag says.

also what FatOldBag says.
And what others have said, it is not even legal to give a false reference/testimonial.

I have seen a 'legal' reference and it said something like;

'so and so worked here between x date and y date, and completed their duties satisfactorily while they were here'

Could you even put that about her? I think not. All you could really was the first bit.

And if she is attempting to blackmail you, tell her to do one. Scammy bitch.

I don't know much about nannytax but surely reporting you to HMRC is a double edged sword. It also means she's reporting her own cash income that she too will have to pay tax on.

yes she hasn't thought of that. Possibly you could remind her?
Tell her that people from Xcountry get deported for not paying tax ( horrible i know but what she is doing / has done is horrible too)
In addition isn't blackmail a criminal offence? Maybe remind her of that as well.

Another one for what FatOldBag says.

You're well rid.

What three negative things have you heard?

I would be factual and honest in any reference. You could always say x worked for me from x date to x date and not much more.

The fact she's blackmailing you now blows things out of the water.

Blackmail only works while something is being kept hidden.

Call HMRC and explain your situation and then the nanny has nothing over you.

References say more in what they don't say. Do not lie on a reference for her. Let me guess where she is from?

myoriginal I could hazard a guess but I am not saying ...:) I don't want to be accused of racism!

NannyTax gave my most recent employer incorrect information on the tax she needed to pay me. They insisted that because I was earning under the threshold nothing was owed, however I had already given her a Starter Checklist (P46) which stated that I had another job (which paid far and above my tax free allowance, meaning that anything I earned additionally would be taxed at 20%, and was the main reason I'd insisted on agreeing a gross hourly rate). It took weeks for me to convince her that it had to be declared even though NannyTax were telling her something different. So definitely push the point with them.

I'd decline to give a reference from here on out.

3 weeks part time no tax due. Just tell her to take a running jump. Never give in blackmail.