is it standard to give nanny 1 hour break in 10 hour workday

[marella9]

I am a new mum and my nanny has asked for an hour break during the day (when child is napping). I am ok with this, but just want to do what is standard for nannies? She often struggles to finish the cooking/laundry for child during the day, so worry this will mean even more is left undone. She is sole charge of one child.

Having employed two nannies, no, neither of them got a formal break. Why on earth would they? I'm not going to pay for someone else to come in 12-1 to cover their break? That's crazy talk. They were both adults who presumably took the time they needed to recharge amid the day, as I do when I have sole charge.

Neither of ours did our laundry or cooked for us, but they did do all the kids laundry and evening meals. In fact, one of our nannies did do our ironing (Dh and I) but we paid her extra to do so - she had actually asked if we wanted her to do it as she found she did have some extra time during the day (our three were different ages and had different school/ nursery etc times, so there were a couple of times a week when she was reasonably free). She had actually come from a nursery environment (manager - she wanted to get back in touch with kids as she found the nursery role too paperwork oriented) and one of ours is disabled, so she also had to do things like physio and incorporate SLT and OT activities into the daily routine.

I am actually boggled. I would actually ask her what she means. How does she see a formal break working?

How does she propose an official contracted break would work? DC will still need to be looked after in that hour, even if it's just while they sleep. Is she new to nannying?

Stringy potatoes , iguessyouarestuckwithme, squiffypotatoes, nannyr what amazing ladies you are and sound like your bloody amazing at your job!

Gosh I wish all nannies were like you X I didn't see anyone acknowledge your comments and wanted to say you go above and beyond!

Is she a new nanny? Honestly she doesn't sound very good!

Is your nanny doing your laundry and cooking, as well as for your DC?
Maybe she is feeling resentful about this, if she is?

As her job is that of a nanny, I believe, she should only take care of DC's food and laundry. With my previous nanny, if she needed to make up a full load, when doing DD's washing, she would add some of our clothes too, but that was never the norm.

I'm actually shocked at how many people expect their nannies to clean the house, as well as take care of the DC.

But I do agree with the other posters. Your nanny should be managing her time better. Don't give her an "official" hour off during the day, as you will never be able to reclaim it back when your DC drop their naps.

If she disagrees, then as much as your DC like her, maybe it's time for a new nanny?

To be clear, she does NO cooking for us or our laundry, only for DC. What she is essentially saying is that becuase she needs an hour break, don't expect that all cooking and laundry and tidying for child will not be done. I am not at home. She is not expecting someone to come in to cover her for her break, she justs wants not to be expected to get everything done each day.

I think from having read other nannies' posts on this thread, that you are so much more willing and capable than my nanny !!! She can spin out making a bolognese into a major activity that takes up all the baby's nap time (currently 2 hours if not more!)

Well I think as much as your DC like your nanny, you need to look for a new one. How can it possibly take two hours to make a bolognese sauce?

Also with regard to laundry, my previous nanny (no longer have one as DD is older) she used to rope my DD into helping her. DD would help sort the clothes, then load into the washing machine. This was at the age of 18months!

There are so many great nannies out there, don't give yourself added stress when WOH by having a rubbish one.

I've had nannies for many years and never had one ask for lunch break.

Sadly, it seems finding a really good, happy, willing to help nanny is like finding a needle in a haystack. Unfortunately, I (and all of my friends) seem to have nothing but bad stories. Is there any surefire way to guarantee getting a good nanny? I went through an agency and also was super upfront about what the job was and what I expected, there were no surprises. And it seems that having only a baby to take care of is actually relatively easy given what other nannies have to do?

I just interview about a million - be very selective. Check references thoroughly.

And if you can afford to pay above the market rate that also helps as you will get more experienced nannies.

And then once you get a good nanny, work like heck to hold on to them! Which sounds like you are willing to do anyway.

It's not normal no

If she is there all day with one baby she can work it so most of the nap town is free anyway

Baby Laundry - in machine, out, dry and fold all with baby awake and nearby playing in pile of clean socks

Cooking - can a) speed up what she cooks, b) do prep and cooking with baby around. Baby can sit in highchair or floor with wooden kitche stuff and dried pasta playing for 20mins whilst most prep is done c) she needs to batch cook. A bolgnaise just for one baby means she should make enough at one time to last a month in the freezer. So she's only cooking larger meal once a week and defrosting. Plus some quick meals between

Toys - she should be teaching baby to not have everything out at once. Most she would be getting out for them. So just a few toys out, baby help put away as age appropriate, then few more out. Max 5 mins at a time.

All the above can be done when baby is awake. Toys tidied before each nap, meaning nap time is generally free for her to just finish up odd bits, and rest a bit.

After reading your last reply she def needs to time management better

2hrs to make a spag Bol sauce is insane !!!

20 mins prep in chopping veg and opening tin of toms - add mince - season and simmer on low heat while sitting down having lunch

I think you need to take the tough approach and state all nurseries duties need to be done and then she can have a break

Agree a lot can be done while child is awake and playing by side - it's good for children to play alone /near an adult

If she can't cope with one baby what will happen if in time You want no 2/3

Has she been a nanny before? What age is she? Assume she had refs you :agency checked - what did they say?

Either you have a long list of appointments/jobs/requirements you've completely failed to mention or you have a hopeless nanny on your hands. I'm guessing it's a hopeless nanny, with a tendency to bullshit added in. 'all nannies get this' is either a blatant lie, or she just has a terrible set of nanny friends. Is she an ex nursery worker? Some of them are fabulous, but on the whole they really don't make good nannies.

You need to replace her, she's too immature & hard work. There are lots of fabulous nannies out there, it can just be hard work finding one. Agencies are as hopeless as the day is long, use childcare.co.uk.

Good luck.

Ps. Your DC will soon adapt to a new, lovely, competent nanny.

Please help - how on earth do I find a new nanny on childcare? it seems they have 1000s of potential nannies and it is so hard to tell which ones are good? I don't want too young and immature but also don't want too experienced as then not flexible and open to things.

I am not looking for anything in particular, just common sense, kind, fun, helpful etc. Cooking is the only thing I actually require on daily basis as want fresh healthy food, but seriously, no other big requirements. Keep kitchen and play area tidy at end of day, We have a separate cleaner who comes weekly.

How do I weed out the good from the bad on a website that lists too many people?

Thanks everyone for your advice, think I have realised I actually have a hopeless nanny

Narrow down on distance. Then narrow down by providing a comprehensive job description and seeing who is interested in doing that work, for the salary on offer. Then narrow those down by CV, then by interview.

I am sat at work, no children with me, some housekeeping duties beckon. However it is sunny and I am having lunch in the garden. Put a wash load on before coming outside, so I like many nannies am capable of doing laundry and eating lunch at the same time! Nannies take micro breaks as and when they can, they don't get dedicated time off during their working day. That is life... if she does not want that life, then she finds other work where she does get that. Her duties should not suffer because she takes a bit of time out - she has to manage her time, such as by putting the laundry on before making a cuppa and having lunch.

Thanks everyone and esp Cindy34 - will try those filters to cut down no of people I have to interview

thanks again !

With our nanny when she only had one child he napped for 1.5 hours and we said have a cup of tea, sit down, read a book for 20 mins... and then get on with tidying up the playroom and preparing lunch etc etc.

Seemed like a nice compromise.

Distance is the good one to start when looking on childcare

Or look on nanny job /put your own advert on there

What area are you in and what days do you want

Some nannies like myself like part time 3days - other need 5 days financially

op I'm so sorry that you've experienced this. Please don't let it put you off nannies. I have a wide circle of nanny friends, most of them are wonderful and do a lot for their nanny families.
I find it hard to understand how she is not finding any time to get her duties done. I get bored sitting down for too long and also feel guilty. If I know a wash needs to be done, I put it on before playgroup (1 min max?!) then I can hang it up with a cuppa on the go. Seriously, children are adaptable. Baby can sit there playing while you wash dishes/ chop veg. Toddlers can be left as they get older to play in other room and so on. .. I always get all jobs done if possible. It's not hard to pick up toys and put some washing on. I even put the hoover through sometimes if I feel it needs doing. it helps me feel productive and my nanny family are literally the best. I finish early a lot and they are lovely, always telling me to take it easy if I'm unwell etc. . so I like to go that extra mile. You will find someone great I promise! Please don't give up :)

marella - I don't think you can tell who is good just from looking at someone's ad. I'd put your own advert up and ask for CVs.

Generally when looking at CVs you want someone who hasn't had any unexplained gaps in their employment history and also someone who hasn't had too many short-term positions. I they send references with the CV ones that say " xxxx worked from xxx to xxxx. they children liked her" are bad ones.

You want to state that they need 2 checkable references and always ask the referees for any bad points and good points, also ask if they would employ her again. We also google the nanny and the referees, on-line history can be very revealing.

I have had a mother's help before ask for a lunch break, as they are legally entitled to have one. I did say that she could have one, but it would be unpaid and she soon dropped the idea!

It would annoy me that she said all nannies get it as that is bullying you into agreeing or you're the bad guy.

I was a nanny. I would have felt ridiculous to ask for an official break in the day as of course the parents couldn't come home to take over....

I did what needed doing, be it contracted or not, and if the baby was still asleep I would watch tv or read.