Benefits of childminder

[riab]

What do you think the benefits of a childminder are over nursery (if you think there are any) for a 1-2 yr old

Oh, another thought about school runs - my ds (nearly 3) is now really comfortable with the local school - and very excited about the prospect of going there 'when he is big'.

and if its one to one you want youd have to go for a nanny i would think, hardly any cm's would only take on one child and nurseryies usually have lots more children per member of staff.

I'm going to write up a list of what is really important to me and get any Cm's I see to be really clear about how they deal with the issues. He is going to nursery 2 days but there's a possibility I may go to f/t work and I'm not sure I want him in nursery f/t I had thought of nursery 2 days and Cm 3 days.

Anyway this is my list - should a CM be able to handle this?

I'm not bothered about one - one but I would prefer no babies under 18 months as I think he'd be better with 1 or 2 other kids between 18mo and 5. I'd also prefer no older kids (ie over 7) unless its one older one belonging to the CM.

CM MUST have a room for him to nap in - doesn't have to have a cot but that would be great. Floor cushion and blanket is okay as long as its darkened room and quiet.

Must be able to accomodate nap after lunch - at least an hour between 12 and 2pm

No need to leave for school run before 3pm and back by 4pm (I could pick him up twice a week at 3pm)

Provides lunch - and is reasonably aware of healthy diet. I may not be the best myself but I'm paying a professional here so I expect them to follow good practise about no crisps, fruit and water not squash to drink.

Start at 8am and preferably no school run or only a short run.

Does outdoor play and creative stuff not just a round of toddler groups were the CM drinks tea.

I knwo this sounds a bit down on CM's I got very disheartened before Xmas. One CM I visited left the TV blaring with the mindees and came into another room with me! (I had asked about a good time to visit)

gah - maybe I should stick to nursery. I'd like him to have that home atmosphere if he is f/t though - at least for part of the week.

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I think that preparing a list of what you feel is acceptable and trying a few more cm is a really sensible thing to do - there's no point you going with a cm just because you feel you 'should' if you aren't going to feel happy with it.

I would have thought the sticking points will be wanting both no older kids and only one younger one ... to make decent money most cms I know have one or two older kids ... and most have children of their own, which kind of means a school run in the morning ... having said that I know a few older women who cm - granny types - who tend to have fewer kids and are universally brill!!

Sorry you've met so many not great cm - sadly, they are out there - but there are also some fab ones - hope you find one as good as ours .... who would fit all your list, except for having older children. She does do an am school run, but I drop my kids with her after that, so it doesn't affect them.

Could you drop a note round to her saying very sorry but you've had second thoughts and are enclosing some money to cover the cost of the contract forms and use of her time? I should imagine that would be the end of it.

whoops - sorry wrong thread.

I adore my CM. She loves ds and he is such a part of her family, her older children come over just to see him and offer to take him out for me in the holidays.
My CM has had ds overnight (at no extra charge) and I know if I'm ever in a pickle she would help out.

he recieves great care, we discuss discipline, sleep routines, food etc and she does things I ask her to do regardless of whether she thinks they are right or not.

He goes out pretty much everyday sometimes just normal things like shopping, or they go out for lunch, or to the park, or play places.

In short.....SHES FAB!!

if you really want to move your child from nursery to childminder (and it doesn't really sound as though you do) you are going to have to make some compromises.

You can not possibly ask all those conditions of a childminder.

You may, if you are lucky find one who meets all your conditions, but whether or not they will object to your list, I don't know.

It's a lot to ask someone who is working from their own home, running their own business, possibly with their own children to take/collect from school and other people's children too.

Why don't you get a nanny?

If you found a childminder who was able to accommodate your wishes now, how would you feel if, later on, she needed/wanted to take on another child in the age range you don't want?

I agree with all the positive info here about childminders, but if you are really not happy about having a childminder, then I don't think we'll be able to change your mind!

As the parent, you have every right to want a certain type of care for your child. I guess the difficulty is that childminders offer care that may be able to be much more flexible than a nursery, but we still work the way we want to work - which may include school runs, different-aged children and (in my house) organised chaos.

if you do want those things and are not prepared to budge, the you Do need a nanny or an au pair, cm's get paid very little as it is, they cant just take on one child to keep the parent happier, they need to earn money too. where as a nanny is YOUR employee, you CAN dictate what she does and at what times to a certain extent.good luck in finding what you want

ds3 (2) goes to a very good nursery and an excellent childminder. He went to another childminder previously, who was also very good but she had to move away. He's only in his nursery now because I couldn't get enough hours with the childminder and she lives some distance from me (even though I think the nursery is excellent- I perhaps wouldn't have started him until he was a little older) . I like the homely atmosphere of a childminder- somewhere he can play with other children in a home environment, the standard meals are better than at nursery (and because he's gluten free I have to send him in to nursery with his meals- whereas his childminder cooks better ones than I do ). I like the fact he gets to play with pets at his childminders as well. Ds3's nursery does have mixed age rooms, but a lot of nursery's don't and I'm not keen on segregatng the ages- think its a bit unatural and think that youger children in particualr benefit from being around a variety of ages.

TBH given your list I'd say you'd be happier with a nanny.

BTW- I don't think ds3's CM has a separate room for naps (she can correct me if she does as she's a mumsnetter), but they don't at nursery either. In both cases he just crashes out - usually in someones arms (again in both cases) then he goes down on cushions. When he went to his other childminders he was younger (baby age) and she had a travel cot for him to go down in, but she had only just started childminding- if she had taken on other children with different needs then that may have had to change I guess.

I did use a big chain nursery with ds1 and would never ever go back to one.

the nursery dd went to two afternoon a week before we moved had a 'baby' area where the children of any age used to go to sleep, but all it was was a cushion on the floor..i wouldnt be happy with this and would much prefer a cm's sofa, but agree at that age a sofa bed, unless one of those very low foam one wouldnt be appropriate.

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and i was told a 'quiet' room and sofa was fine for naps??..never the same set of rules is there!

Hmm, some good points but just to clear up one or two things:
i didn't say I didn't want another toddler, just that I'd prefer not to have a small baby as well. Neither did i say I wanted one 2 one care. I also understand that CM's have their own kids and that basically I am compromising my ideal routine with theirs.

I'm not saying I'm set in stone on the age thing - its a list of 'like to have's' but the nap thing does puzzle me. I would of thought that anyone with mindees under 2 (especially if they have more than 1) would make decent arrangments for a nap.

Sorry to anyone who does do this but I'm not happy with DS crashing out on a sofa. I worked hard to get him sleeping in his cot or at least on a mattress in a dim room, I'm not convinced he would have good quality sleep on somebodies sofa in their front room.

Shosha, your routine sounds good.
You said you had 10mo, 18mo and 4yr old. If I found a CM who had a 18mo(ish) and 4yr(ish)with my 21mo that would be fine.

I have an aversion to school runs and older kids because of some CM's I've visited. As I said one took over an hour to do the shcool run walking - so DS would spend 2 hrs every day just sat in his pram. Another picked up from 2 schools in the car (35 mins)and DS gets travel sick over 20mins.

Older kids I'm just not sure about, Shosha, what happens when the older ones get in from shcool? I assume the 5 yr old fits in with similar activities to the 4yr old, but don't the older 2 get bored? what if they have homework/want to go to a club?

I just have this mental picture of a bored preteen hogging the TV, an 8yr old beign full of energy, the 4 and 5 yr olds playing chgase, the toddler whinging and the baby crying. PLEASE NOTE, I'm not saying i've seen this or that this happnes its just my fear.

I think you're being unduly pessimistic.

I also feel that fitting in with other children is a big positive about being with a CM. My daughters get the feel of being in a big family - hell, in a community. And sure, there are aspects of my CM that I'm not hog-whimpering wild about but she's also utterly, utterly fabulous. And I can assure you that the busy round of groups they attend do not involve the CMs swigging tea!

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i couldn't fault my cm atall. when i had dd she would come around at 8 in morning to pick up ds to take him to nursery and bring him home again when the session had finished (it was school nursery not a day nursery) so he didn't miss out - i had a cs so couldn't drive - she didn't charge me When i had a breast abcess she drove 25 miles to mothercare to get me a breast pump. DS cuthis head open at scholl, dp took him to hospital and cm drove 30 miles to collect me from work to meet dh at hospital. She has bent over backwards to be more than just a cm - she even drove me to the dentist when i was meant to have my wisdom teeth out. I don't think a nursery would do any of this.

plus she likes cakes and biccies anddrinking tea so when she has no mindees i go over and we chat and drink tea - plus i haven't seen her as excited as when i said i was preggers, she's dying for a baby to look after, last one she had was 8 mo placed by social services. current youngest is 4

It might be optimistic to expect a separate room for a nap as many childminders only register the downstairs. Most nurseries I've seen have looked harder to sleep in- often having fixed times for example and the children lying next to each other on mats. I've always thought the only one of my children that would have fitted in with that would have been ds2. The others, no chance.