Child extremely upset at au pair leaving

[ThePoisonwoodBible]

This year we hosted our first au pair. She was very good and became like part of our family. Our daughter became particularly close to her. The au pair left at the end of the academic year and our daughter was distraught. Three weeks have now passed and still our daughter cries herself to sleep most nights.

I am really concerned by my daughter's reaction. Has anyone else experienced similar? I now worry that our next au pair, who starts in September, will either be rejected or that my daughter will go through this attachment and loss each year which would be too cruel.

While it is great to have a good au pair who integrates into the family I am beginning to question whether it's a psychologically healthy form of childcare given most au pairs stay one academic year.

...unless you were talking about someone else hahah

Morethan you are not telling the truth though. The 'truth hurts' argument would be relevant if what you said was true, but it clearly isn't, so what we're left with is just hurt and that is nasty.

Good post from bbkl - wish we could like on here as on Facebook.

I think bkkl has a really good point too maybe she's just missing a close relationship with another person. They're not at school at the moment as well so she doesn't have the closeness of her friends either.

Our children have enjoyed talking to the new au pair over the past couple of weeks over Skype.

I also think sometimes criticism of other people's parenting methods is a good thing, its very acceptable to condone misguided parenting methods that benefit the parent rather than the child.
I suspect my son would have had a better reception year, had a couple of the parents not subscribed the the unconditional/attachment parenting philosophy.

i didnt see the post that got deleted before it got deleted iyswim

but i do kinda agree with that poster in the fact that a 7y shouldnt be crying theirselves to sleep every night over their au apair and possibly could be something else bothering her

yes its nice they got on so well but she has to learn that people move on

agree also keeping in daily contact is prolonging the pain, but fine to say write letters or skpe once a week but blondes hates skping anyway

Thank you all. I have just logged on so never got to read the original post from potatoes. It sounds like I may have had a lucky escape. Whatever was said I am very comfortable that DD and I have a close and loving relationship. I work fulltime but I also play with DD (and all my children), laugh with her, listen to her thoughts on things and generally feel secure that we all rub along in our big, busy family very happily.

DD is the oldest of three so not an only child. For two of the three weeks since the AP left she has been on holiday with me, her dad, her sibs, her grandparents... All of us together all day doing fun stuff, so I dont think she is lonely. She just adored the AP.

The AP wants to stay in touch. She has found leaving hard too. She proposed the October visit.