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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Was your partner present in theatre when your spinal was put in before CS?

101 replies

mears · 30/07/2009 20:14

Either for emergency or elective CS?

In my unit the partner comes into theatre after the spinal has been put in and the woman is all covered with draped.

If there is an epidural in place, the partner again does not come in until the woman is prpared and draped.

When did your partner come into theatre? If he wasn't there for the spinal going in, did you feel left alone?

Should partners be present the minute a woman is admitted to theatre.

Experiences please.

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Claire2009 · 30/07/2009 22:56

No both times, in France.

IDreamOfJeannie · 30/07/2009 23:41

I had an epidural already in place when I went into theatre (emergency CS).

But my DH was sent to get changed, and he was gone for ages (about 15 mins) and I kept thinking "why the fuck is it taking him so long to get changed?".

I was also scared

When he finally arrived they'd already started cutting in to me. He had to avert his eyes as he walked past because he didn't want to see all the blood and gore

DH told me afterwards that he was told to wait in the room until someone came to bring him into theatre. And no-one came for 15 mins

sandcastles · 31/07/2009 02:09

With Dd1 I was under GA, so no..not allowed in. Although on reflection it would have been nice to have a familiar hand to hold while they were preping me! But I get that it was an emergency, so no room for sentimentality!

Dd2, elective. Spinal. Dh declined to come in for not just that, but the birth. Which I knew in advance. MIL was there & as a retired nurse, was very interested in it all.

She was there all the way through & helped me feel relaxed as we chatted about inane stuff!

LeninGrad · 31/07/2009 02:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

eidsvold · 31/07/2009 03:37

for all my c-sections - one emergency in the UK and two electives here in Aus - dh was with me from beginning to end.

Mears - the only time he left me when having the emergency ( in UK ) for dd1 was when they took him off to get scrubs etc - he was back ready to wheel me into theatre. In fact I panicked cause I could not see him and then realised he was the one beside me helping to push my bed down to theatre!! He actually was helping hold me still when they were putting the spinal in.

In Aus - both times he did not leave even to put scrubs on. They just handed them to him and handed me my theatre gown and left us to get sorted.

I found with no1 - which was the emergency - I actually panicked when I could not see him - because this was everything I did not want. I was having an ultrasound one minute and the next being wheeled to theatre. He even stayed whilst they put the catheter in - albeit at the head end. I think it helped me be much calmer knowing he was there.

In each case - he saw it all - including seeing dd2 and dd3 being lifted out - the theatre nurses each time dragged him up to say - see there the baby is. Dd1 they did not as they were worried about what state she was in.

In fact now I read - it seems there was no question that dh would be with me right through it all.

SofiaAmes · 31/07/2009 05:54

My spinal was put in in a labor room in front of a whole slew of people. Dh then came with me into theater for my emergency cs. I think it's much better to have your partner there throughout the procedure. A cs is a very frightening thing to have (especially, in my case, after 40 hours of labor).

Chynah · 31/07/2009 11:06

MrC walked to theatre with me for my elective and was present for the spinal and throughout (holding my hand and joking with the anethetist). Once DS was born he was put on my chest while they put me back together and MrC had a cuddle too (the anethetist took some photos for us) and then we all left theatre together to go to the recovery room - was a really good experience.

glasjam · 31/07/2009 11:31

I've got a feeling that they leave the partner to get dressed and then don't tell him where to go as a deliberate delaying tactic. Both times my partner said he was such a fumbling mess when he was asked to get into the scrubs, that he could barely tell which way was up - he managed to find his way through to the theatre just after the spinal had been administered and he says he will never forget the beatific smile of sweet relief I had on my face!

I didn't mind him not being there for the administering of the spinal as he had been with me constantly for 3 days at home attempting to have a home water birth after a cesarean (HWBAC). I was just so past caring.

However, if I had been genuinely distressed and worried (rather than just wrung out and in pain)I probably would have wanted to cling on to him for every step of the way. And certainly in the event of a planned CS, I would have liked him to be there sharing the journey.

AitchTwoOh · 31/07/2009 21:27

GLASJAM! where've ya bin?

Pingpong · 31/07/2009 22:51

DH had to wait outside while I had spinal. He sat and cried as he thought he was going to lose me!
MW had to hold me really, really tight as I was having very strong contractions and had been trying to push for 2 hours and then I was trying to squeeze my legs together and keep the little mite in while they faffed around trying to get the needle in.
I really and truly believe that DH couldn't have coped with this bit and wouldn't have been much support for me. He is bad with blood, needles, hospitals in general.
I think it is acceptable to make partners wait outside for this bit.

glasjam · 31/07/2009 23:17

Have been here there and here!!

Have been doing NOTHING and have taken the not-over-scheduling-the-holidays to the extreme.

2 weeks left - argggh!! Must do memorable, meaningful things for my children - might do the Grove next week or have a worm watch/tea drinking session in the Dale if you're interested?

And this thread has REALLY taken me back!!

twinmam · 31/07/2009 23:18

Surely depends on the people involved Smac? There was no question of DH not being there in my case, thank goodness, and had he not been with me it would have made a terrifying situation - 2 prem babies and me seriously ill - all the more dreadful for me. I needed him there with me and was only just holding it together as it was. As far as I was concerned this was something we were going through together although it wasn't his spine that was being prodded with an enormous needle

AitchTwoOh · 31/07/2009 23:22

oh yes i cried.

yes yes yes to the grove or dale (what's the dale? is it g12?) dd2 would be delighted. is it only two weeks? what's the actual date? i need you to tell me these things.

AitchTwoOh · 31/07/2009 23:24

yes, twinmam, likewise there are some men who wouldn't be any use/might faint in a normal labour suite but we don't keep men out of there. i'm sure it's better for the anaesthetists and all that but really, who is the priority? (okay, it's the docs. it's always the sodding docs).

twinmam · 31/07/2009 23:29

If there was a genuine reason for partners not being in there, ie it would stop the drs being able to do their jobs properly then it would obviously be fine. However it does seem to come down to personal preference (of the docs) and I think in that case the needs of the mother and her partner in what can be a very traumatic experience ought to come first.

AitchTwoOh · 31/07/2009 23:31

agree, twinmam.

AbricotsSecs · 31/07/2009 23:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Sycamoretreeisvile · 31/07/2009 23:41

Yes, DH was there for both spinals. On my first emergency section and for my elective 2 years later.

He held my hand. It was very important. He told the anaesthetist where to go when he yelled at me for the 10th time to "arch my back like an angry cat"

Fuck off mate. I'm contracting like a mofo here and this is my 7th day in hospital...

Original poster

mears · 31/07/2009 23:46

That is a concern sycamore that partners cannot cope with their wives being asked to do what is seemingly impossible but vitally important.

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Sycamoretreeisvile · 31/07/2009 23:49

Ok, I see that. But it was actually DH physically pushing my back into a curve that got me in the right position...

I'd have gone hysterical at the guy if DH had not been there, I know it. DH held me together, kept me focussed. Could see that the Anaesth. was not communicating to me in a way that DH knew I would respond to. Knew what to do where the professional didn't.

ThursdayNext · 31/07/2009 23:53

I had a spinal prior to having what could have been forceps or a CS, though forceps worked in the end. The spinal procedure would be the same even though I didn't need a CS in the end, right?

DP was with me, which was definitley a good thing, and I don't think he was in the way at all. It would have seemed very strange for him to be excluded from this without a convincing reason.

Original poster

mears · 01/08/2009 13:51

I see sycamore. That is a good point about communication, that your DH was able to get you to understand what was needed. Yes ThursdayNext - same spinal procedure.
I am going to raise this issue at our unit meeting next week and see about changing our policy!

OP posts:

AitchTwoOh · 01/08/2009 19:58

is the process the same as when you get an epidural as part of a vaginal delivery? i had one with dd1 (although it didn't actually work, gggrrr) and the cat back thing was certainly the same. i can see that there was a lot more testing etc of toes and whatever with this anaesthetic, but the 'sit on the bed and try not to pass out' bit felt the same.

Sycamoretreeisvile · 01/08/2009 20:05

Yes Aitch, I think so, because my spinal was put in after 15 hours of labour and it was only after that that DD's heart rate dropped and it was suddenly emergency section.

DS's elective was not NHS though as I managed to wangle it on my health insurance. So their rules probably different and more inclined to service desires of patients. DH was with me for that spinal in a little ante room before I was wheeled in to theatre.

MrsMattie · 01/08/2009 20:11

With my DS 4 yrs ago - no. It was fairly last minute and he was gowning up while they did the spinal.

With my second baby 8 mths ago, yes. He was there for the whole thing.

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