Very personal..

[Veryshy240468]

Well to cut straight to it, I was diagnosed with genital herpes 13 years ago when I was 19 years old.

I realise this isn't the most pleasent subject but please do not judge or be disgusted by me. I was not and have never been promiscious, I was simply unlucky.

Given that I have lived with this for so long, I am absolutely fine about this now and accept it for the minor (if annoying!) occassional nusicance that it is.

Anyway, I am now 15 weeks pregnant. I have done enough research to know that this is generally only a problem if you catch it during pregnancy and specifically if you have your first outbreak during labour. If you already have it te risk of passing it onto your baby is very small as your body will produces anti-bodies that are passed onto the baby.

For that reason and becasue I couldn't bear to be judged by the midwifes for something thatis not my fault, I didn't mention this at my booking in appointment, but now I am wondering if I made a mistake.

I know the risk is tiny but I would never forgive myself if anything happened to my baby and I had not said anything.

I suppose what I am asking is what you would do if you were me? I have my 16 week check soon - do I need to decide to mention it then or not at all?

And also if anyone has any experience of this - how did the midwifes react and what did the consultant recommend.

I realise some people may not feel confisent talking about this on here so please e-mail me at [email protected] if you prefer.

Thank you

You must tell your MW as it can be dangerous for your baby to be born naturally if it flares up around your due date.

They should not judge you but they will do what is best for you and your baby which could mean some baby-safe meds to control your condition or every a C-section if that is what your baby needs.

its nothing to be ashamed about - somone close to me in my family got it, but she got it from a bad case of coldsores on her mouth and from touching your mouth you can transfer from herpes simplex1 to herpes simplex2, just by wiping after going to the toilet.

your midwife wont judge
i guarantee it.

Redhead81
that's rubbish by the way! herpes 1 and herpes 2 are different viruses, they cannot transform from one to the other, and you can only get each type in one place so if you have type one on the face, you will never get it on the genitals (although you could get type 2 - but would have to pick it up from a completely different source.)

Tell your midwife everything - that, and then anything else you can think of that may be of no consequence at all.

If they know, then it's their responsibility to do what's right.

If you don't tell them, then the responsibility 100% lies with you.

I know which I'd rather.

Oh, and they have heard it ALL! Trust me!!!

StarlightMcKenzie - genital warts?!

HPV (warts) and herpes are different - what do you mean? If you have herpes you need to have a swab taken to see what type of herpes you have. I've never heard of herpes on eyebrows or tummy but it can pop up in weird places.

That's bad luck. They can pop up around the site of infection, usually right on it but not always. Maybe yours is a particalarly annoying strain!

Redhead81
Erythema multiforme is an allergic response to many stimuli which can include herpes. It is not herpes itself. What she is passing to different areas of her body is the skin condition, not the herpes virus. Passing herpes to different areas on the body is impossible due to the method by which herpes attacks the body. The virus 'attaches itself' to a point either at the top or base of the spine (I believe - I could be wrong about the exact siting) in the first infection, and every subsequent blister is due to the virus shedding down a particular path until it breaks out on the skin (hence usually getting outbreaks at the site of infection)
Once the virus has made a home in you it cannot move elsewhere as the body creates antibodies that prevent a second infection by the same strain.

Firstly can I just say a huge thank you to everyone who has taken the time to reply - I'm really touched by your understanding and support. I hadn't realised until I read your replies, quite how much I was letting something so silly spoil such a precious time and I'm very grateful to you all for helping me get this in proportion.

Obviously when I was diagnosed at 19 I thought my world had ended! But quite a few(!) years later I have come to accept it for what it is and I can honestly say it has had very little impact on my life. Of all the medical conditions I could have, I'm actually very grateful it is something so minor in medical terms.

I will of course talk to my midwife next week at my 16 week check up. Despite the clumsy way I worded my OP, it was always a question of when/how I mentioned this to the midwifes rather than when - I simply could not/would not take any chances with the health of my baby, no matter how small the risk is (and I recognise that unless it is your first attack, the risk is very small indeed). I think I just blew that conversation completely out of proportion - I actually feel a bit silly now!

A special thank you to backintheuk, and Kat for reminding me I'm not alone in this! Although I am generally quite at ease about the whole thing now, obviously its not something I chose to shout from the roof-tops about the same as most other people - so it is easy to start thinking it is just you, when the reality is it is actually quite common and as such, as you have all pointed out something that the midwifes will have come across before. I guess I'll have to try a lot harder if I want them to sit there open mouthed and horrified as I first imagined!

Thank you all again - will let you know what she says next wed x