Large baby, EMCS - can anyone explain/relate?

[Quickdraw23]

I have tried to be succinct here, I’m sorry it’s so long!

My baby was measuring on 99th centile at 32 and 36 week growth scans. No gestational diabetes.

I did a ton of research on birth and large babies, increased risks, pros and cons of intervention etc etc.

i also read a load of stuff about scans not always being accurate and spoke to a lot of people who told me that my body couldn’t grow a baby that was too big to birth vaginally. I decided to attempt vaginal birth with a mindset that if a c section was needed for clinical reasons then I was fine with that.

i had a really long first stage of labour at 40+3 days that began almost immediately after a sweep. At 4cm dilated I went into urinary retention and had to be catheterised and was moved from the MLU to consultant led delivery ward.

I carried on and got to 8cm without pain relief, with contractions that were coupling and about 2 mins apart but manageable, when all of a sudden a contraction came on that just never went off. I couldn’t breathe through it, my stomach was visibly contracted and it was showing on the monitor. The baby was fine, but I couldn’t cope at all, the pain went on for 20 mins with no break and I had to have an injection to pause the contractions.

At this point I decided to have an epidural. I could still walk on it so was stomping around with all my attachments trying to get the baby to descend, but he just didn’t, I stalled at 8cm for hours, my catheter wasn’t draining and my kidney function started to pack in. An EMCS was strongly recommended, I decided my kidneys need to last me a good while and agreed. All went fine.

i am (mostly) fine about the outcome, but i guess I just want to know why this happened. Deep down I suppose I want to know there was nothing else I could have done. sometimes I feel daft for attempting a vaginal birth in the first place.

Was it likely that he was genuinely just too big (his head was 99th centile when they eventually hauled him out). Head at a funny angle? I didn’t do enough forward learning inversions?

does anyone have any ideas or relate to this experience?

thank you if you read this far!

Big baby club here too! First was 10lb, born via forceps and an episiotomy. Second, I attempted a vaginal delivery. No clue why, he was born via e c section in the end, 11lb9oz 😂 it's taken me time to come to terms with it and I had a debrief about my first birth as it was quite traumatic for me. Keep talking about the birth, and time is a huge healer! Well done mama and congratulations!

Similar to you, no GD but my DS measured massive on growth scans, with a particularly large head. I’m on the small side myself. I was terrified of shoulder dystocia and so I asked for an elective section. In the event he only weighed 4kg, but his head was well into the 9th decile. Like your DS, he was soon wearing age 3 hats. Certainly the ones that came as part of an outfit never fit him.

All went well, but a few of the staff on the postnatal ward were a bit funny with me (some “too posh to push” type mutterings). And 14 years later, I still wonder, on occasion, whether I should have attempted a vaginal delivery.

So I think we’re more than capable of giving ourselves a hard time either way! Enjoy your lovely boy, but do ask for a debrief if you think it might help you accept your experience - 10 months in is not too late.

I would second those who say about an ELCS if you have another. I had an EMCS for my first. Big baby (although not as big as predicted) went into distress - although no sign was related to size. Was determined to have a VBAC with number 2, and yes the recovery was better in the immediate aftermath. But wasn’t the amazing experience I had convinced myself it would be and left me with a bad prolapse. In hindsight, I wish I’d gone for a planned cs, which sounds worlds apart from a EMCS

You are being too hard on yourself and really you shouldn't be. Please don't waste years of your life thinking you're some sort of failure because you didn't have a "natural" birth. From my own experience that won't do you any good. My first was facing the wrong way and then managed to get herself absolutely stuck - face presentation. When she was born by EMCS after they realised she was in distress, they had a hell of a job to get her free, she was exhausted and born with a bruised face where she'd been banging against my cervix for hours. The background to all that was induction, in active labour for around 36 hours - the last 12 or so of those on a syntocinon drip to try and blast her out and me with an epidural because I'd reached my limits the night before. She's 32 later this year, it's only the last 5 years I've stopped feeling a failure about her birth and also her younger sisters which followed a similar vein but for not so long. and accepted it's just how it is. I'd probably have been one of the ones that died in childbirth back in the olden days...

Thank you so much folks for more kind words and sharing of experience- I know these things can be quite raw to thank about, im truly grateful.

i am being overly hard on myself and you’re right i should absolutely pack that in as it’s not productive or helpful! I was super sensible about my birth preferences, and specifically chose a MLU that was in the same building as a consultant unit in case anything went a bit sideways, so really everything did go to plan!

i think takeaways from this experience and hearing from you all are:

• we need to remember that birth comes with risks and we’re very lucky to live in a time and place where we have access to life saving care when things don’t go smoothly

-encouragement from the ladies at pregnancy yoga who all birthed 10lbers at home with no pain relief or complication should be kindly received but taken with a pinch of salt

Glad you're feeling better about things. You did absolutely nothing wrong. You made your decisions based on the information and your feelings at the time.

I definitely would recommend getting a birth debrief. You can have one up to 12 months post delivery, or in your next pregnancy.

Definitely sensing a recurring theme of massive babies with massive heads in thread. My second has a particularly massive head (he's 4 now and has the head circumference of an 8 year old) like this, and sure enough I wound up needing a C-section after I got stuck at 5cm during labour.

He was back to back with a deflexed head (head tilted backwards). Bit of a shock to the system after I'd delivered my first vaginally with no issues. He is my second and last child, so not even the chance for a VBAC. I was so disappointed in myself and wanted to know where it went wrong. I had a birth debrief and came away feeling much better about it all. I now accept there was nothing I could have done differently that would have affected the outcome.