Please... who coped with labour BETTER than they expected?

[Salme101]

I'm a first-timer, 40+3 and no signs of labour yet. I really just wondered if anyone could tell me something positive, as it just feels like everyone I talk to and everything I have read on the childbirth board states or implies that labour is an absolutely awful, painful and terrifying experience. I hadn't really worried about it before (didn't see the point), but now I am having a major wobble and feeling really scared. The idea of being out of control and screaming etc probably frightens me more than the idea of pain, tbh.

I know everyone has a very individual experience, but please, please, please - I don't need to know anything more that is negative or scary, as I think fear could really make things worse for me

dd1 was 5 hours start to finish. agree with whoever said it was more a case of hard work and stamina than pain.
i found it helpful to remember that each contraction will onlly last a maximum of 60 secs. i figured i could cope with that.
stayed at home, no drugs. wanted to do it again as soon as she came out. can't wait for number 2 due in september.
enjoy!!

I coped better than expected - I think the key points are to breathe properly (you only understand this when you're actually in labour, I think). Take really long slow breaths and make the breathing out last as long as you can.
Don't panic - every pain is taking you closer to your baby. The contractions come and go, so just when you think it can't hurt any more, the pain recedes.
Stay upright as long as you can as gravity helps a great deal and like someone said, let your body take over, accept that it probably will hurt but that the pain is for a reason and your baby will be there before you know it.

I did all this and was in labour for about four hours with DD and the same with DS, although he flew out in three pushes! I'm only short and very slim too so that has nothing to do with it imo.

Good luck and DON'T PANIC!

And that feeling when the baby pops out and all the pain stops is just brilliant.

Whhy do people feel the need to tell you horrific birth stories when you are pregnant

I was surprised with my first how much better than it was than I expected. I am really pathetic with pain so expected to be asking for every drug going, epidural the lot. It turned out I did it with just a bit of gas and air and was so proud of myself. This ended up in me having a home birth second time round as I knew I could cope

I've had 3 and my longest labour was 4h 40mins. To me the pain of labour is a walk in the park compared to the 9 months of pregnancy, so you've done the hard bit!!! I used the pool for pain relief, and it really really helped. And gas and air was fab! If nothing else it helped me keep my sense of humour, which was vital! I would say if you listen to what your body is telling you and trust your mw's and yourself the whole experience is very positive. I would go through labour again many times, but not pregnancy!!! good luck!

Me !! Was told that you def don't want to be induced as it leads to the "cascade of intervention" (basically saying you will need every form of pain relief and then prob forceps or c sec anyway). Was keen not to use pain relief so was gutted when at 42 wks was told I needed to be induced. But it was fab! Contractions came on very quickly but only lasted 2 hrs then when I was told to push, it was 3 contractions and out. 2nd phase only lasted 4 mins. Fab. Did use gas and air which is great and midwives were amazing. Get them to talk you through everything.

No 2 even better. Got to hospital after a few contractions and then felt urge to push, did so and DD just slid out ! Literally. That was a lovely experience.

Thank you, everyone! I feel a lot calmer now, and ready to take things as they come. It's comforting to know there is so much commonsense and kindness out there. I will come back and let you know how it goes

Lots and lots and lots of my clients. Trust yourself, your body and your ability to birth your baby. You'll do better than you think.

Me too! Gas and air is fantastic stuff - DH loved it too. Epidural was great and even the C-section was not too bad (just a bit scary). Ask lots of questions and have faith in yourself. Personally I can't wait to do it again

Good luck with it - just remember you will have a beautiful baby at the end of it all and that makes everything worthwhile !!!!!

I didn't enjoy labour, but my goodness I enjoyed pushing the baby out! I could feel her coming down the birth canal and loved that I could finally do something with each contraction and really go for it with the pushing. An absolutely amazing feeling, and one I'm looking forward to repeating in about 15 weeks!

Hi Salme
I gave birth to my third baby this time last week at home (DD1 epidural and augmentation due to meconium, DS1 ELCS) and so it was my first natural birth.

I too was worried I wouldn't be able to cope as I had never done it before... but honestly, it really wasn't THAT bad. In fact, I coped so well, that I sent my independent midwife home, thinking I had ages to go, and ended up giving birth with only DH present as she couldn't get back in time!!!

Just find a way of breathing/making a noise like 'ommm' or something through each contraction and remember that the most painful bit of each one only lasts a few seconds, then dies off. Don't think about the end, or 'how long will this last?', just take each one as it comes and try to relax and joke or chat between each one.

I never thought I could do it, as I am a right pansy and take pills for every ache and pain, but did it with no pain relief at all!!

You can do it - your body is amazing.

Everyones experience is different, and many women do not have a horrible time. I think the 'It was fine' ones dont feel the need to post as much as the ones who had a difficult time so don't take message board posts as a straw poll! I didn't have a bad labour either time (2DCs), both were really fast and I had no pains during the first stage at all ie dilated fully before I felt a thing! I had an epidural first time because they were about to induce me (before they realised I was actually about to give birth) but to be honest it was no better/worse than my second which was pain relief free due to speed. That was a 20 minute labour - intense yes, but definitely completely not horrific or anything. More amazing to be honest. Id do it again at the drop of a hat. As some one else said, its actually a really interesting experience.

Can you labour in a pool? I hear thats the best way to stay relaxed and less in pain..?

I did

My first birth especially I can think of as lovely. Yes, I had gas and air, but I am a huuuuuuuuuuge wuss with pain and was stunned I didn't start demanding epidurals.

DS was harder because he was a longer labour and I was tired, but still a good birth (homebirth, rationed G&A) and would do it again

me. another wimp here too. i had problems and ended up with an emergency cs, but it was fine.

it's labour, you know it's going to hurt, but you can do it and you will.

gas and air made me talk nonsense!

good luck