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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Puffer fish vagina, anyone else?

37 replies

Valleymum18 · 12/10/2025 23:11

Hello everybody,
I am new to Mumsnet, but I will probably not be hidden for much longer.
After six years, I have decided to reach out to other mums to see if I am alone in this experience. Be prepared; you're in for a ride.

Short story long: In 2018, I was pregnant with my child, and at the end of the pregnancy, I was diagnosed with polyhydramnios and was advised that it was safer to be induced before my due date. Mainly because I ate my body weight in food whilst pregnant and became the size of an elephant, and the fluid was starting to affect the baby's heart rate.

On a wet, miserable October Monday, I was brought in to be induced. After two pessaries, a hormone drip, a maximum of four hours of sleep, and a total of 84 hours of induction, I gave birth to my beautiful boy at 2 a.m. on the Friday morning. I suffered a third-degree tear, and I also haemorrhaged 1.2L of blood. My placenta decided it liked my body better than a bodily fluids bin and attached itself to my womb a bit too much.
I was taken in to theatre to be what I can only explain as being fist** by a surgeon to remove it. Legs wide open, and not for the reasons I would have liked, even though that's how I suppose we all got into this situation.
Whilst I was on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, upset and traumatised by the whole situation, I overheard the surgeons say, "I can't get my hand in to stitch as the swelling is so excessive." Now you can imagine the thoughts running across my mind, but I decided that I was maybe thinking too much into it and that swelling is "normal."

All stitched up and back to my room, a few hours later, I mentioned to my husband I felt something was in between my legs because I couldn't close them. My husband made a little joke that it wasn't the first time I couldn't close them and then lifted the blanket up to give me a reassuring check. I was half expecting him to say there is a nipple guard caught between my flaps or maybe it's a big, soggy pad that's rolled up.
Ladies and Theys, if only I had captured my husband's face in that moment. The look of horror that I have only ever witnessed in movies. He asked if maybe he should go grab a midwife to check things over, but I insisted on not bothering them and told him to "man up" and take a photo. To be honest, at this point, I didn't think there was anything that could top the whole experience so far, but boy, was I SWOLLENLY surprised.

He handed me the phone, and I tried to process what I was looking at. At first, I wasn't sure whether maybe they had decided to do gender reassignment surgery on me or if I was the star of a porn movie that specialised in suction.
My labia looked like they had visited the local beautician to get 10ml of filler ready for Ibiza with the gals. I couldn't quite figure out the anatomy. I was even more concerned whether my clitoris had fallen off completely.
I was mortified, worried, upset, but slightly impressed with how feisty she was.

After six days in hospital, multiple doctors from different departments examining me as they had seen "nothing like it in the 20 years they've been in healthcare," I was seen by dermatology. They advised it was probably an allergic reaction and I needed steroids. Twenty-four hours of steroids and she was looking like a cockerel's wattles—not ideal, but we can't be greedy.

I have showed the image to numerous people over the years. It's normally on a night out and shared amongst friends at how bad it was. It's become a running joke between us all, and everyone is quite sick of the sight of it. I kind of wish I had some of that filler back in currently, as I have to tuck the excess back into my knickers regularly.
But I was told by some friends yesterday to get this on Mumsnet and see if anyone else has had a similar experience. Believe it or not, I actually work within Gynaecology now, and a consultant I work with told me that it wasn't an allergic reaction and was indeed related to the excessive fluid and a long induction in a seated position, which makes a lot of sense.

I would love to share the image with you all, as you can see I am a bit of a joker. Too much of an open book to be worried about what people think. Social anxiety hates to see me coming. More so, though, I feel it's very comforting to share my experiences and be so open with other women because a lot of us deal with loads of issues postpartum, and I feel there is no shame.
We all have saggy bits here or there, stitches, holes, marks, or lumps that we don't need to be embarrassed about. I hope you all laugh at this, but if you can take anything away from this experience, it's that no matter how you brought your precious ones into this world—whether it was natural, emergency, or whatever—you all did an amazing job. It's not easy, and it's damn well hard on our bodies. Give yourself grace and never forget to thank your body. Don't be ashamed, ladies, especially when there are people like me walking about with saggy flaps!

Love yous and leave yas 🥰
If anyone wishes to see the image which is slightly explicit. I don't mind sharing it in the comments!

OP posts:
BrickBird · 13/10/2025 01:04

I had a one night stand during uni with no recollection of the night at all the next morning. A total blank and I didn’t even know how it had happened or who it was. The next morning my labia had swelled to such an enormous size I couldn’t even put trousers on. My friend came to the door to see if I was okay and I couldn’t put the zip up on my trousers and had to hide it under a large t shirt. I was absolutely terrified thinking this would be life from now on, never being able to put trousers on and hiding an enormous vagina. Although the swelling went down by the next morning, I didn’t leave the house for days, so traumatised!

Zapx · 13/10/2025 01:19

Just wanted to say that was one of the best posts I’ve ever read on mumsnet about a pph (I had one too- with similar, ah, “treatment”). Thanks so much OP! 🤣

Valleymum18 · 13/10/2025 08:15

BrickBird · 13/10/2025 01:04

I had a one night stand during uni with no recollection of the night at all the next morning. A total blank and I didn’t even know how it had happened or who it was. The next morning my labia had swelled to such an enormous size I couldn’t even put trousers on. My friend came to the door to see if I was okay and I couldn’t put the zip up on my trousers and had to hide it under a large t shirt. I was absolutely terrified thinking this would be life from now on, never being able to put trousers on and hiding an enormous vagina. Although the swelling went down by the next morning, I didn’t leave the house for days, so traumatised!

Ooooooo! He obviously gave you a very good seeing to with not a lot of lubrication. Your little labs got pissed off with the friction. Glad to hear it got better! It can be very traumatising to see something that is meant to be so feminine, look like a pair of testicles.

OP posts:
Valleymum18 · 13/10/2025 08:16

Zapx · 13/10/2025 01:19

Just wanted to say that was one of the best posts I’ve ever read on mumsnet about a pph (I had one too- with similar, ah, “treatment”). Thanks so much OP! 🤣

Hahah thank you! It's always fun to have a good laugh about it.

OP posts:
Valleymum18 · 13/10/2025 08:18

tallache1 · 13/10/2025 00:40

‘Social anxiety hates to see me coming’

🤣🤣🤣 OP I fear I am the same as you when I tell people about my episiotomy that went wrong, got infected and actually smelled like something had died in my vagina post partum. Having kids gives you a special kind of ability to not give a fuck about anything anymore, doesn’t it?

Life's too short to give a fuck!
LOVE that for you. The joys of motherhood 🤣

OP posts:
Cadenza12 · 13/10/2025 08:25

But this was 7 years ago, maybe time to let it go? It sounds like you were traumatised by the event. Did you have counselling?

Dyra · 13/10/2025 08:39

Sorry for the mean hearted comments you got early on. As far as I'm concerned all information is a good thing! Though probably best not to post a picture on a public site however much I would have liked to see it.

We hear that there will be swelling post birth, and that things can look different post partum, but what exactly does that look and feel like? shrug First hand accounts of the extremities are always useful, and I hope someone looking for reassurance about what has happened to them in the future will read this and feel better about it.

netflixfan · 13/10/2025 08:39

Honestly the things we have to go through. I’m coming back as a man next time. Don’t worry OP it will settle down.

Valleymum18 · 13/10/2025 13:36

Cadenza12 · 13/10/2025 08:25

But this was 7 years ago, maybe time to let it go? It sounds like you were traumatised by the event. Did you have counselling?

I think you've looked at this the wrong way to be honest. I'm not holding on to anything due to trauma. It's more so that after all these years people have been telling me they've seen nothing like it and I thought it may be helpful. There is lots of mothers out there who are probably not dealing with the changes in their bodies, this was a bit of light hearted comedy to make someone laugh about my experience. I am not still going on about it or still traumatised. Just thought it was the right time to share amongst others and have a laugh. I'm sure we all at some point share with others our childbirth experiences in a cafe or a mums group, or a coffee date between friends. This is like that but I'm getting it out to more women. Women who have came on here got advice or support who may also be dealing with this very issue and need a better outlook on it.

OP posts:
Valleymum18 · 13/10/2025 13:40

Dyra · 13/10/2025 08:39

Sorry for the mean hearted comments you got early on. As far as I'm concerned all information is a good thing! Though probably best not to post a picture on a public site however much I would have liked to see it.

We hear that there will be swelling post birth, and that things can look different post partum, but what exactly does that look and feel like? shrug First hand accounts of the extremities are always useful, and I hope someone looking for reassurance about what has happened to them in the future will read this and feel better about it.

Edited

Thank you for your post! I think all experiences good and bad help us out. If we can have a laugh along the way then that's great.

I thought it was only fair that someone like me who doesn't take them self so seriously, do it in a way where I could make people laugh and open the subject up for other mothers who may feel embarrassed about changes happening to them.🥰

OP posts:
MissScarletInTheBallroom · 13/10/2025 13:42

Thanks for this OP. Did it all go back to normal in the end?

Valleymum18 · 13/10/2025 18:24

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 13/10/2025 13:42

Thanks for this OP. Did it all go back to normal in the end?

I still have some residual saggyness. I would love to have labiaplasty but it doesn't get done often on NHS now. It went all back to normal after steroids.
I have been told I am at risk of it happening again if I have enough child so I would need a c-section next time round.

OP posts:
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