Got some questions about Doula's...

[NatalieJaneIsPregnantAgain]

I have a long old way to go yet, but am thinking about hiring a doula this time for a few reasons.

My last labour was 2 hours long, I don't drive, the hospital is more than a taxi ride away, I have very little support in the way of child care for my two boys, DH will be working anything up to 4 hours away, I really don't want a homebirth, no mater how romantic the idea seems, and the last two births have been induced so probably wouldn't get a home birth anyway.

OK questions about Doula's:

Firstly, without sounding ungrateful, but if I hired a Doula, but then ended up being induced so DH would be around, the kids would be sorted etc. so basically I wouldn't need the support from a Doula, can I cancel her services at the last minute? (Oh god, that sound's much worse than how I intend it!)

Secondly, If for example, my labour started as quickly as it did last time, (waters broke, contractions started immediately) so I call the Doula, she get's here 10 minutes later (have checked and there is a Doula within 3 miles of me) but then DH makes it home within an hour (and in time) can I then ask the Doula to forget me and sort the kids out?

And thirdly, (partially unrelated to the Doula) if I go into labour at home with both my boys here, Doula and DH both can't make it in time, WTF do I do?

Arghhhhhhhhh I only have another 34 weeks to fret about this......

CSWS,

I'm a Doula and had suspected GD with DS2. I was induced early but due to Ob Cholestasis.

You shouldnt have to tell a doula about GD - most (if not all) would know already.

Take a look at www.homebirth.org.uk in regards to people who had homebirths when they had GD (look under 'why cant i...').

Take a look at doulas in your area and contact a few.

Thanks ladies. I think I will get in touch with my first choice Doula (already had someone in mind) and see whether she would be happy to travel a little (less than an hour I believe), and get some idea of how much she would charge. Still not certain whether I want one or not, but guess it's helpful to get in touch early (am 20 weeks).

Natalie exactly the reason why I used a Doula- so i wouldn't be alone if dh couldn't be there.

In ther end I didn't 'need' her for that reason but she was exceptionally useful to have around as we had a rather stressed out scared seeming MW and her rpesence made me rather nervous!

Doula's seem to vary on their exact what-they-do terms but certainly you don't ahev to use one if you dont fancy it at the last minute- thats entirely your choice

I hope it goes well CSWS.

I must say that even if you decide not to call the doula to your birth that the full fee is still payable. Doulas contracts do vary but this is generally what happens.

im on baby number 7 and hired a doula for the first time
shes on mumsnet and probably reading this post
i really need the support through labour if anything else to keep me going and remind me WHY im doing this i can do this and its going to be ok lol
incidentely my DH works away all week come home friday
i have no family at all no support and 3 little boys here
shes coming to my ante natel appt and scan tomorrow
he is due in july so we are gettin there

Thanks everyone, still not made a definate decision yet, but plenty of time for that

Hi There
I am a Doula, registered with Doula UK and Nurturing Birth. Generally the way Doula's work is once we are booked you pay a deposit (non refundable) if you choose to cancel the Doula, within a certain time scale you do not pay the balence.
However, most people find having a Doula adds to the overall experience whether or not you partner can be there, in fact she will be supporting him as much as supporting you, the birth is the beginning if the experience for you both.
I would suggest contacting some Doula's in your local area and talking to them, you are committing to nothing by having a meeting.

I hope this helps, feel free to message me back if you have any other questions.

Natalie, definitely worth sounding out possible doulas now - I left it too late to find someone both local and available. The doulas I saw weren't that keen on helping out with childcare, which is totally fair enough, of course. But I reckon that's a gap in the market, as like you I wanted a doula more to make sure there was definitely going to be someone around who could help out generally, to let me focus on labour and not be fretting about my daughter and stuff. Maybe if you start looking now you'll find someone like that.

I have been a homebirths where I have helped with the siblings, also I was booked PURELY to look after 2 children whilst their mum and dad went to the hospital. There are Doulas out there who will do more outside the doula 'remit' - we are there to support, and this may include siblings.