Travelling for private maternity

[Mushroo]

I’m thinking about childbirth options and one option is private. I’m looking into this because having never used the NHS for anything, as an onlooker it just seems like I can’t trust them to have capacity at the minute. I hate not being listened to, feeling like I’m on a conveyor belt and the thought of a post natal ward really fills me with dread.

So for these reasons I’m looking at the Lindo wing. On the website the prices seem to be under £10k, is that about right in practice?

The other big issue is that I’m based in Manchester, and obviously, I won’t know when I’ll go into labour so travelling down would be hard (and then travelling back with a newborn).

Has anyone done this? Am I being ridiculous entertaining the idea? We don’t know anyone in London we could stay with so would be reliant on hotels / air bnb.

@Maireas thank you!

Pp suggesting a private room in an NHS hospital sounds like a good idea. You could pay for all the ante natal tests and a private maternity nurse afterwards.

You're right that private maternity care (in full - all antenatal plus the birth and postnatal days in a fully private hospital like the lindo wing) is almost exclusively London based. Most other areas of the UK offer private antenatal care at a private clinic but then the birth at an NHS hospital (midwife led with your private consultant popping in and called if felt necessary). I did the latter, although had a section by consultant due to breech presentation.

I think you’re mainly paying for better food when you go private, if something goes wrong they’ll ship you back to nhs. For a vaginal birth without complications NHS will try to get you home within 8 hours anyway, so you’ll spend very little time in the ward anyway. I’d definitely look at private midwife instead if you want vaginal birth.

Do you have any risk factors? If you don't, is there a NHS midwife led unit near you? I gave birth at the Rosie in Cambridge which is Jo use to you but there may be something similar close to you. It's in the main hospital but was a very different experience to the main ward. Private room with birthing pool etc, 1:1 midwife etc. It felt a bit like a hotel and had the reassurance of the clinical side being right there if we needed it.

No use not jo use!

It’s 10k for the hospital and 10k for the doctor. (Approx) add another 2-5k for private scans etc. lindo is attached to an NHS hospital.

youre not just paying for better food. You’re paying for peace of mind that you’ll be seen quickly, easily, regularly in the event of complications at any point in your pregnancy. During my pregnancy I had pregnant friends with similar complications to me, and the disparity in care we received was major.

But I don’t see how you could do it from Manchester, even if you go for ELCS. You come for scans and check ins once per month, then towards the end it’s once per week. If you have complications it can be every few days.

@Theresahippopotamusonourroofeatingcake yes the hospital has a brand new MLU.

my only worry is that I’d want an epidural, and I don’t think you can there.

It’s all just fear of the unknown I think and knowing how overstretched everything is at the moment. My big fear is definitely the post natal ward after reading lots on here.

@Puppyseahorse thank you. Interesting to hear another perspective.

I actually work in London (but only go down once a month) so scans not outside the realms of possibility but obviously so far from ideal.

I think it’s likely not feasible but I wish it was - the plus points I want are exactly what you describe. Being listened to as an individual and not a cog in the NHS ‘computer says no’.

No you can't have an epidural in the MLU had my daughter at the MLU at St. Mary's in Manchester, was a good experience and she was born at 6am discharged 8pm and never spent any time on the post natal ward but all was straightforward and baby and me were both fine.

I know some of the NHS consultant do private work but I'm not aware of any private maternity provision in Manchester. Also no private NICU provision if you need it which you hopefully won't. I don't think St. Mary's has private rooms you can pay for but this wasn't important to me so didn't look into it and my daughter is 9 now.

I agree babies can be unpredictable and wouldn't fancy making a 4hrs plus drive down to London in early labour. Maybe look round some of the local hospital and you can transfer care if you don't like where you have booked though alot if the hospitals have merged to being under one trust now.

I would absolutely say not doable to travel during labour. I often used to do that journey and it could be 3 hours or 8 hours. You could be stopped on the m6, m1 m25 or all 3.

But I do absolutely understand why you would want it. Having had a homebirth with one-one midwifes in the UK (just before they stopped funding the service) and a hospital birth (public), the most important bits for me would be:

1. having someone with me throughout my labour. I had 2 midwives with me at home (5 hours) and one midwife in hospital (50 minutes!) and from watching things like OBEM I'd have hated being left just me and my husband in a room. My labours have been very fast and intense, so I'm sure it's common to be alone in your room for longer labour's at the start, but I've heard so many stories from friends and colleagues of just not being believed, not being given even gas and air as the midwife didn't think they were in labour (then examined and at 9cm), and the midwife rushing in just as the baby is literally coming out.

So my advice would be to use the money to hire a doula. Someone you can meet plenty of times before and who can be there with you throughout, even if the NHS ward is busy.

They can also advocate for you when you are at your most vulnerable and may be unable to express you wishes on pain relief or not being put lying on your back for example.

2. A private room after birth. Sorry, I've no idea how you go about this, but it's the one I'd really be looking into. If there is any way you can pay for it then 100% do. My experience of being on a ward after birth was just horrific, although there wasn't even anything at all 'wrong' with it. Staff were lovely and I was only on a ward with 2 others (lovely, quiet ladies). But it was SO noisy and I got literally 20 minutes sleep both of the nights I was there. The exact opposite of what you need when you've just given birth.

So leave ASAP after birth if you can and get in support at home where possible. But that only works if you have a straight forward birth and don't have to spend any time in hospital after- so look further into how and where you would be able to get a private room.

@LivingOnAPrayerYes thank you. You’ve managed to accurately pinpoint the exact things Im worried about!

I will look into a private midwife / doula as that does seem to exist in the NW. I essentially want a professional focussed on me, and not rushed off their feet. Also knowing post birth I can slowly get to grips with breast feeding etc. with someone I know and trust.

it’s mad to me that despite being willing to pay, the option just doesn’t exist!

That's pretty much true. I was a midwife and on the whole, you get good care when you're in labour.

I cannot recommend your booking in London when you live in Manchester, though! I remember when I worked in Inverness, a woman booked in a Glasgow hospital. She had serious complications at 28 weeks and never saw the inside of the Glasgow hospital. She was rushed to us in the Inverness hospital (and her baby died anyway, and she almost did). I don't mean that her being booked in Glasgow caused the death and the complications, but there is no point booking so far away. Any complications - even fairly minor ones - need you to be geographically close to your hospital.

I do agree that postnatal care can be (often is) very poor.

Could you arrange for a maternity nurse, and have your baby locally, then get home ASAP to your private nurse? Many ex-midwives work as maternity nurses if that is important for you.

......it’s mad to me that despite being willing to pay, the option just doesn’t exist!

It's postnatal care that is the most important, though. You can easily arrange for a maternity nurse.
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I understand where you are coming from OP.

I avoid using the NHS like the plague. I did however birth my son in a NHS hospital.

But I never ever saw a ward. I arrived , 4cm taken to delivery, private room for that, gave birth, had some tea toast and a shower afterwards and was discharged 3 hours post birth.

So you may not even see a post natal ward if all goes well.

Late husband drove us home and I was eating a MC Donald's with my 6 hour old baby in the Moses basket in the living room. 🤣 It was the best MC chicken sandwich I had in my life!

Midwife came round the next morning. DS is 8 so this wasn't many moons ago.

Private delivery is the best money you could ever spend. I had nhs ante natal care and bloods, private scans and 2 ante natal appointments with my consultant. Having had 2 NHS deliveries I can tell you the difference is night and day.

I had one to one midwife care with a known back up. Epidural on tap, delivery by the consultant which was the only one where I didn’t need an episiotomy. I then had the consultant repair and poorly stitched episiotomy from my last delivery which had caused me serious problems. Post natal my, yes I had a lovely room but that was by the by. The midwife sat with me all night to help me get feeding established and that baby was the only one EBF.

It was the private wing of an nhs maternity hospital which meant the baby was an nhs patient and had any special care been needed would have been on site. Would spent it 100 times over if I ever had another baby

yes I did, Manchester to London isn't that bad, we did from Scotland.
there are no fully private options outside London. I did the Portland, it was fine. People spread rumours that there is no NICU Etc but there is, my baby was in it.
worth every penny, and id do it again.

@ppure how did you find the journey? Did you get a short term rental in London?

I would love it I think but I’m struggling to see how it would work logistically.

What would you do for antenatal care if you decided to book for a private birth in London?

The Catherine suite in Liverpool women's is in the north west...not as close as you would probably like but closer than London

@Lj8893 yeh this is the problem. If we were going to do it I think I’d look to rent somewhere in London for a month but that brings its own stresses (and cost!).

I think I’m leaning towards private midwife at a local hospital and a postnatal package. And hope I get a birth like @CaptainBarbosa which sounds like perfection!!

Sorry just noticed no mention of this online but they definitely used to offer private midwifery care. Maybe worth a phone call

AN care is longer than a month though so that wouldn’t work?

There are some incredible private midwives in the north west.
I can highly recommend “My Midwives” who are based near Manchester (both ex 121 midwives).

yes we got a serviced apartment, I was having an early scheduled section so I didn't want to risk going into labour early and having to deal with the nhs...we had it booked for a few months after the birth too but I discharged myself from hospital on day 3 and we drove 7 hours home 😝only because I didnt really like London and how crowded it is.
The hospitals will recommend local apartments usually. loads of people go from all over.

@ppure and @Lj8893 thank you both so much for your insights.
I’m going to spend sometime properly looking into all the options available!