Talk to me about homebirths - 2nd DC

[Margo34]

I'm still early (16w) so plenty of time to decide, low risk so it's an option, and this is my second DC, first being a (30hr long) labour ward birth with episiotomy and suction.

With childcare to think about this time for the 2yo, I'm seriously considering a home birth. I love the idea of it. I've just no idea how it would work from a practicalities perspective.

Can anyone talk me through what to expect? (Including the clear up afterwards 🙈 )

Bonus points if you can talk me through the practicalities of having a home water birth, too.

TIA!

This is a breakdown of stats for my region from our recent RQIA that regulates here alongside the RCOM for homebirths.

Don't apologise! It's all important stuff that is on my mind while I'm considering a homebirth. I live a little under 4 miles to the hospital so it isn't far, about 20m to drive for a regular punter (unless traffic is awful) so hopefully quicker in an ambulance if transfer is needed, but indeed you're absolutely right there are also the other time delays to factor in as well, call answer time etc, and time can cost dearly.

Thank you for sharing and your photos, @CraftyCats ! DH just said to me - if there's that much electronic equipment and stuff that needs to be continually plugged in, what's it going to do to our electric bill especially if prices rise again in April (when baby is due)!?! 🙈

Had a lovely homebirth with my 3rd. Other 2 DC upstairs asleep! All happened v quickly and midwives made it just as the placenta came out! But it was perfect and was clean and in my own bed an hour or so later. Midwives cleared up and took away all the "gunk"! Go for it but make sure you ring the midwives earlier than I did!

I had a planned home birth with my second. Barely made it to the hospital in time with my first. Long early labour (18 hours) - that can be normal with second babies. Established labour was in the shower and then the pool when it was inflated. Midwives turned up and hung around for a bit while I watched repeats of Would I Lie to You? (Still can't watch that show to this day, ruined it for me) and alternately ate and threw up Mini Eggs (ditto)

Midwives fucked off for a bit as nothing was happening. They'd been gone about half an hour when my waters broke and I started pushing. They then couldn't get back to me due to a lorry fire on the M4, and ambulance couldn't get through either.

Ultimately I'm fine, baby fine but honestly a little bit traumatized and would not repeat in a hurry. I genuinely thought a planned home birth would guarantee there would be midwives there. I had no idea they would leave me.

@Useyourname oh gosh I'm surprised they left! I'd have thought the same as you that a planned HB would mean you'd have midwives there! How long ago or recent was this if you don't mind me asking? Glad you were both ok 😊

Mine was great. Sat in a warm bath until ready, then had the baby on my bedroom floor (protected the carpet with a shower curtain covered with cheap towels). Then called for Dominoes.

she came much quicker than expected, so was delivered by an ambulance crew rather than a midwife (midwife arrived literally at he point of birth), but all went really well. Would definitely take that approach again.

The NHS is massively understaffed. If nothing is going on, it's not efficient of resources to leave midwives in a house with one woman, when they could be in a hospital or birthing unit looking after more than one. If you choose to give birth away from medical help, you take those risks.

How lovely most of these stories are! I had DC2 at home. Contractions ramped up so we phoned the midwife, who arrived within 15 minutes. She examined me and my waters broke, a second midwife arrived within minutes of that. I then got into the pool and started pushing and baby born shortly after that. The midwives tidied up all the mess (there wasn’t much) and drained the pool. We had breakfast together in the living room by the Christmas tree and then DC1 woke and was introduced to their new sibling.

It’s a memory I look back on and still feel euphoric. We had my mum on hand to come and look after DC1 if need be and we live a 15 minute drive from the hospital. I had full trust in myself that if anything seemed ‘off’ I would transfer in. I wasn’t having a homebirth to prove a point, just it made sense from a childcare and covid (at that time) point of view.

I’ve had two.
my firstborn was born in the lounge, midwife came over, checked me out then left, came back when things ramped up a couple hours later.
they bring entenox and a resuscitation unit with them. The ambulance service comes to your house to check access to driveway and potential issues in road.
second baby was born in the same lounge, conveniently arriving about 15 mins after dc1 had gone to sleep 😂
mum and DH here to look after the first baby.
midwife arrived ten minutes before my second born arrive.
I highly recommend it. It is safer to birth at home than a hospital. This is because in order for oxytocin to flow (which is what progresses labour) you need to feel safe and cosy and comfy. If you feel panic or worry etc your body released Adrenalin instead which stalls and sometimes reverses labour (yep it can close the cervix up again til you feel safe). If you go to hospital you are more likely to require intervention which interferes with the hormonal matrix which just leads to a cascade of further interventions.
im sure some women will come on here and tell me I’m wrong but I thoroughly researched the risks vs benefits of home birth.
cervcial checks tell you nothing useful (you can go from 1cm to 10cm pretty quick, trust me!) and in my experience they were painful and interrupted the process.
the best way to birth is at home in familiar surroundings, with minimal intervention.
my community midwives actively promote home birth, so when I told them I wanted one they were totally on board. You aren’t guaranteed to get the same midwife as the one who’s been looking after you all the way through, so try and meet them all if you can!
it really is such a nice feeling being able to go to your own toilet and shower/bath, and go to your own bed after birth. Hospitals are for sick people. You don’t need to give birth in one (unless there’s a serious medical reason or, of course, if that is what you want!)

I'd imagine being sat in traffic isn't efficient use of resources either though, more so if additional ambulance was then scrambled to replace them 🤷

that's why you can't really be guaranteed a MW will get there in time if you choose a home birth.....

Mine was in Ireland 15 years ago so possibly some differences. Dh was adamantly against the whole notion but came round when he understood the safeguards and protocols fully. It was only available in certain areas and paramedics could call it off in the event of road problems etc.

I was allowed labour in water but not birth in the pool under the regulations at the time.

In the event it was a fast, hard birth. It felt like the midwives followed my lead although obviously they were making their own decisions too. Dh helped me up to bed after and they had everything cleaned up while we were still chatting and then brought up the tea and toast.

It felt like having a big sister there, giving advice and tips and when she went home after a while it was just lovely being in my own bed with dh, instead of kept awake in a hospital and him at home.

All the midwives on the team without exception were lovely. The visits, before and after, always felt more like a social call. Ds was a nosy toddler and they’d be chatting and playing with him. There wasn’t the same officiousness as with the HV or even the community midwife team we’d had before.

I’d found the hospital experience very hard going and it was a lovely antidote. Obviously other people mightn’t have such positive stories, but for us it was the best decision.

Homebirths during covid lockdown were suspended in my area otherwise I'd have considered if for DC1 but sadly wasn't an option.

Yours sounds like such a lovely warming memory! 😍

@Whatsleftnow another lovely homebirth story!

There does seem to be more positive stories than not, but maybe that's because negative stories aren't comfortable to share so freely, totally understandable.

I had my BEAUTIFUL homebirth with DD 3 years ago, after a horrible previous experience in hospital with DS (80+ hour labour, back-to-back baby, neglectful care due to understaffing).
My home birth could not have been more different. 4 hour labour, midwife arrived within 15mins of me calling her. I was in the bath for the first hour or two, then mum filled the birth pool and that really helped with the contractions (I was so caught up in the moment I didn't have any pain relief). I tore quite extensively but it wasn't very deep so the midwife stitched me up on my sofa so I didn't need to go into hospital, thank god - though we're only 10 mins drive from hospital if we had needed to transfer).
I can't describe in words the euphoria of eating hot buttered crumpets on my own sofa, having a lovely shower in my own clean bathroom then snuggling up with my gorgeous calm little newborn in my own bed - it was the polar opposite of the hideous postnatal ward in hospital and I really think DD was a contented baby because the whole birth and immediate post-birth experience was so peaceful and happy.
In terms of arrangements my dad looked after DS while I was in labour. The birth pool was pretty easy to empty, just siphoned the water off into the drain using the same hose we used to fill it. Hospital lent the pool to us for no charge. Midwives left a couple of bags of equipment at the house when I was 36 weeks and brought extra stuff with them on the day. Oh and there was no need to entertain the midwife, she was amazingly unobtrusive and just sat quietly on the sofa filling out paperwork and observing up until baby was crowning, I almost forgot she was there until she was needed. The second midwife didn't arrive until after DD was born as she was stuck in traffic but as we were both fine it didn't matter. Overall it really was an incredibly empowering and healing experience.

@Margo34 about 18 months ago. She's walking and talking and gorgeous 😊

Home birth was strongly recommended for my situation by my midwife of >20 years experience as the statistically safest choice, given the circumstances with my first labour, and may well still have been the best choice for my situation. I called them out at the correct time according to the instructions I'd been given. I wonder (although I don't really know!) if for both labours, I was in transition, but medics thought labour had stalled, and that's why the pushing phase seemed unexpected! My midwives were lovely - it was just one of those things, but it's something I would take into account if I were ever choosing where to give birth again (hah! not happening 😂)