Give me your best hypnobirthing advice!

[newbluecurtains]

For various reasons I've decided to have a home birth. This limits my drug options to just gas and air, I'm getting a birth pool as I've heard this is also good for pain relief, and I've been researching hypnobirthing.

But I feel like I'm being really naive! Sure, many women have used hypnobirthing at home and had a good birth, but many MORE women have given birth screaming in agony and needing the epidural! Who am I to think I could be the exception and manage at home without all that??

Please give me your best advice for using hypnobirthing as an alternative to stronger medical pain relief. If I don't feel confident then it's not going to work!

You can use the breathing and visualisation routines no matter what happens, even if you are transferred to hospital. I'd have these in mind as a tool for getting through the birth, however it unfolds, and ignore the stuff that implies that you actually have any control over whether or not you will have complications. They can fuck off with the "it's not pain, it's pressure!" Bullshit as well. It is fucking pain, but this is one tool for managing it.

The pool was wonderful pain relief. I'd say the work of my pain relief/management was 70% the pool, 20% gas and air, 10% hypnobirthing CDs on repeat.

Definitely listen to the CDs before - knowing what was coming on them, it felt like a familiar friend guiding me through.

Have a look at spinning babies website for yoga to release the pelvic area pre birth and during labour.

I liked the TENS machine in early labour. The pool apparently slows things down so you might want to plan how you will manage things on the early stages before you get in. You can use your hypnobirthing cd/visualisations here too.

I used to put the CDs on when I was in bed falling asleep. They really got into my subconscious!

Go to actual in person classes, I did a refresher class with a MW second time and it was worth every penny.

Find a visualisation that you like (I didn’t get on with some of them, I’m not very imaginative) and listen to the recordings every night (I found they helped me sleep so well even with pregnancy insomnia!). Practice the breathing technique. Get your partner involved so they know the deal and can support if needed.

Know all your options re: pain relief and what to ask for when. Be prepared that things can change beyond your control and that’s ok if they work out differently, in fact I felt hypnobirthing gave me the confidence to feel that I would get through it no matter what happened.

I had 2 waterbirths without even gas and air, just breathing. Yes crowning was very painful but the rest was more of an extreme “intense” feeling. My second was supposed to be a home birth but ended up being an induction during lockdown which I was absolutely terrified about but it was actually really nice!

I know I’m lucky to have had straightforward births and it wasn’t the hypnobirthing that caused that but it was what got me through the experience.

Good luck!

I had a planned induction with dc2 - I had an induction the first time and it took ages and led to an epidural. I read Katherine Graves book because I wanted to teach myself hypnobirthing techniques aiming to avoid epidural. Her preachy chapter about how you can't do hypnobirthing alongside an induction really p*ed me off.

I think it is quite personal what will work for you but for me the key is:

• don't start the techniques too early. I watched a favourite comedy for a while - laughter is known to help people manage pain better (puts you in a positive frame of mind). Studies have shown that people who are in a happy frame of mind need less strong and frequent painkillers in all sorts of situations. A study on surgeries where patients have to stay conscious during the procedure found that patients who listened to their favourite funny movie before and during the surgery reported experiencing less pain, less fear, and had faster recoveries. Fact not fiction.

• literally know your own mind. Some techniques will work for you better than others. I made up my own visualization and my own soundtrack (a 4 hour YouTube track of rain and birdsong, as i knew the white noise of the rain would help drown out the sounds of the other three women in the induction room moaning in pain, which I found with dc1 makes me fearful and panicky).

• breathing, breathing, breathing.

• you do have to trust the technique and believe you can master the pain. I mean clearly you can. Women have give birth for thousands of years, in some cultures in complete silence. Remember the pain isnt going to disappear - this isnt magic - but you are going to respond to it in a way that enables you to endure it, reduce it, control it. It's incredible empowering.

• do practise the mantras, exercises, visualizations. It is important go be able to get your mind into a safe, predictable space. You don't want to be actively thinking about the techniques, just doing them.

• go to a class in person, if you can afford it. Everyone I've know who does hypnobirthing benefits from it. I didn't do a class but I'm already experienced in visualization and meditation etc so I found it easy to understand what the hypnobirthing approach needed to be like to be effective for me.

• it isnt just gas and air! You can have paracetamol. Just because it is a common drug does not mean it is ineffective. I had two paracetomol about 4 hours before my DC was born and they did help.

• Make sure you tell the midwife you are hypnobirthing! My induction team decided to ignore me (which was great, no monitoring) as they were sure I wasn't progressing at all because I was talking normally and "looked comfortable". I had to plead with them to physically check me (at a point I really felt I needed some help) and because I was smiling and chatting they said I should carry on walking around to speed things up. Turns out I was right and minutes later, I was being wheeled at high speed to a labour room as I was 7.5cm dilated and they had to admit they "hadn't noticed". I am still so smug and proud of that! 😁

Gas and air is BRILLIANT. It was also brilliant when I was being stitched up. Use your techniques well and yes, it is perfectly possible to get by with paracetamol and G&A.

My third was a home hypno water birth and was lovely.
Do the in person classes definitely
Listen to your particular CD/ track while meditating/relaxing at home to get familiar with it
Have fairy lights
Buy and set up your pool as a practice weeks before due date
Have tea and biscuits in for the MW
We had takeaway pizza- but of a party atmosphere before the labour ramped up then I left DP, MW in kitchen and went into lounge by myself. MW observed me from the doorway so as not to disturb and only came in when I was transitioning to assist where needed and catch the placenta!

No post natal ward yay!

Thanks for the advice everyone, I'll do lots of daily practice. I'll also use a birth pool, tens machine, birth ball, paracetamol and gas and air.

I am nervous though as today I've have really bad digestion/constipation cramps and I was just thinking if this hurts this much how will I cope labouring at home!! The breathing did help though which is good seeing as I haven't even practiced it much yet!

I would really recommend Moon & Stars hypnobirthing & the naked doula on insta - not crunchy at all and make learning about hypnobirthing really fun. Moon & Stars has a podcast too!
Good luck and believe in yourself. Agree with all Pps about practice even when it feels silly. And I also had affirmations on post it notes in random places in the house so I saw them all the time (e.g. when making a cup of tea, would open the drinks cupboard and see 'my body is made for birth' etc'). I found that helped to internalise the affirmations!

Follow the naked doula on insta, she's really 'real' and explained what's happening and why, and what you can do to aid your body at each stage. I found understandings the science behind things really useful rather than the image of the airy fairy perfect birth.
I think alot of hypnobirththing is about mindset, trusting your body and staying in control. If you can do that you'll be fine :)
Oh and also, accepting pain relief, a transfer or whatever else doesn't mean you've failed - just try and use the BRAIN theory and feel comfortable and in control of the decisions you make x

Thanks all - turns out it wasn't constipation it was food poisoning and I was up all night in a LOT of pain!

I'm just looking into which hypnobirthing audios to use and I'll start daily practice. I also think I'll do an online course with my partner, looking at the KG Hypnobirthing course, Maggie Howell, or the Naked Doula, hard to know which to do.

Had my home visit with midwife who was very encouraging and got my birth pool arriving soon to practice with. All the advice has been really helpful thank you!

I found hypnobirthing great for getting me into the mindset and trying to embrace the pain rather than conquer it. I also found a lot of it airy fairy so ignored entirely. Best advice is don't expect it to be rainbow and sunshine. Just because you're embracing it doesn't mean it won't hurt. My labour til 5cm was bearable, the breathing, the affirmations all helped. My baby then turned back to back, no amount of hypnobirthing helped at this point. If I wasn't so adamant not to transfer in I would have demanded an epidural. The idea of going into an ambulance in my state was just too much. Once my baby turned again labour was bearable again and I didn't even notice the second stage in all honesty. I was more afraid of that. But it was so straight forward. For people who get anxious I think it really helps or those who have straight forward deliveries. Anyone else I think have a back up plan and know anything can happen in labour.

I gave birth on a labour ward (reduced loo ember and blood loss) and used just gas and air, and the hypnobirthing techniques. I used a combo of timed breathing and visualisations. Both worked amazingly well for me and kept me calm and focused. My husband, who did hypnobirthing with me, was also key as he kept reminding me that with each contraction it was baby moving further down and out and that each contraction was temporary - I only needed to focus on this one. I ended up needing a ventouse because of baby distress so not quite the zen/all natural birth I was hoping for but I still wouldn’t change it for the world! If you’re still deciding on hypnobirthing I highly recommend The Positive Birth Company, which is self-paced training but there’s a private Facebook page which tonnes of positive home birth stories!

Hypnobirthing is great. Best investment I ever made! I didn't even have paracetemol, let alone gas and air and had a water birth in a hospital. It was an amazing experience and finding a good hypnobirthing coach (one who is open minded to what YOU and your partner want) is crucial.
I used Sally Elspeth - she's based in Cheshire I believe but she does online classes too.

‘Loo ember’ is meant to say ‘movements’. My week old baby made sure I saw every hour last night so blame any typos on tiredness!

Once.youve got your safety plan in place. Forget that. Focus on how the body births. Have confidence in how your body works. Research the hormones and how they help the birthing process. Research everything and anything that talks about how powerful your body is. Read nothing scary. Believe you can do it.I say this because fear etc inhibits the hormones

Practice pooping without pushing. I know that sounds crazy but your body kind of ejects it when you let go. My body did that with my second baby. Just breathe and it comes.

And also, don't be too disappointed if it doesn't happen.