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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

To be expected to go to the hospital 3 days postpartum?

57 replies

Lafoosa · 18/04/2022 12:15

So I'm currently 3 days postpartum and originally the midwife said they'd be coming out to me to do a home visit, but now they've said they expect me to come in. They know I don't drive and neither does DP. I've torn in two places and I can hardly walk up the stairs. Even if I were to get a taxi, which we can't really afford anyway I'd still have to walk the whole way around the hospital and up 2 flights of stairs just to get to where they want me to go (lift if always out of order).

I also have no childcare arrangements for my other two children, so I'd have to go alone which isn't the best idea because I'm not very steady on my feet yet so I don't feel like it would be particularly safe for me to be out alone with baby so quickly when I can hardly even stand.

OP posts:

GeminiTwin · 19/04/2022 07:54

I had to do this 3 days after. I had a section and was still hobbling and not standing up straight. Trouble was, I wasn't insured to drive. I was in no fit state to drive and DH had a trapped nerve in his back and could barely stand.

I managed to get my mum to drop me off and the hospital had lifts but it was still hell.. ended up staying the night as DD needed the billi blanket due to jaundice and has nothing packet.

Nightmare. Tell them you can't go. Or try and organise hospital transport.

What happened to the good old days where a HV would come to you.

elidelochanthefirst · 19/04/2022 07:59

I wouldn't go in. I would rather be resting at home. I honestly think this terrible. I don't understand the post partum care in the UK.

CornishGem1975 · 19/04/2022 08:25

I think home visits are a thing of the past. First two pregnancies the midwives came out. Last one I was expected to go to a clinic. I'd had an EMCS and my partner is self employed so wasn't taking paternity leave. I managed to get there but there's no thought goes into it at all.

Nyfluff · 19/04/2022 08:29

I was in a wheelchair and crutches and had to go in day 3 in a taxi, I didn't think to question it tbh but was young. If you can't, you can't.

ChaToilLeam · 19/04/2022 08:35

You can’t go, so you won’t go. Tell them that. I am sorry your post partum care is so shabby.

user1471519931 · 19/04/2022 08:42

Absolutely unbelievable! I'm in Scotland and had home visits from midwifery team until discharged into health visitor team care and had home visits from them until I was able to cope and attend the health centre for checks etc.

Comedycook · 19/04/2022 08:49

When I had my second DC...I was discharged two hours after giving birth at midnight and told to come back in the morning so me and my baby could be checked over... ridiculous

Neverreturntoathread · 19/04/2022 08:53

That’s appalling. My mother’s generation got two weeks bed rest in hospital after giving birth. I (10 yrs ago) got daily at home visits.

Refuse to go. Your body needs rest, your womb is still shrinking back to its earlier size. The fact that the NHS is broken doesn’t mean you have to do whatever you’re told.

Vsirbdo · 19/04/2022 08:57

You have my sympathy. I had to do that on day 5 after a c section and it was really the last thing I wanted to be doing but at least we had a car. I would try saying that you physically can’t and see if they will then come out/

PurBal · 19/04/2022 08:57

I had to do this due to staff illness and holiday. DH does drive but even so it’s an hour each way. Tell them no, hopefully they’ll send someone out. It wasn’t a massive inconvenience for us.

Mustardmusings · 19/04/2022 09:00

I had to go in daily post EMCS as my baby was in NICU for several weeks. It was a 30 min drive and not very comfortable in the car but I managed (I didn’t drive at first). Got dropped at the door but the hard bit was carrying the bags of EBM and my lunch etc up the stairs. Can anyone give you a lift?

Whoareyoumyfriend · 19/04/2022 09:02

My first was a home birth. They did a home visit when he was a day old. After some concerns they sent me to hospital. It was the most physically challenging journey.

I'd only head in if you have concerns, op. It's not going to be good for you as you need rest

jessycake · 19/04/2022 09:08

I am shocked how far backwards we are going , I would be too busy with salt baths , and coping with a newborn . I would not be taking my myself and baby unless I had a lift there and back.

LadyCordeliaFitzgerald · 19/04/2022 09:14

That is appalling. And day 3 for many women is spent crying due to the hormone drop.

There will always be posters of the “I did so you should suck it up and stop whining” variety but refusing to go is a step in the right direction for everyone.

ComDummings · 19/04/2022 09:18

That is unacceptable

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 19/04/2022 09:25

I had my last baby in 2005. Visited everyday at home by midwife for first week, then every other day 2nd week. Then HV visited

In 1993 when l had my first, GP’s routinely visited during second week.

pedropony76 · 19/04/2022 09:43

I had my first baby last May but because we were in hospital for 7 days, the 5 day check up was done whilst we were on the ward. When we were discharged both the midwife and the HV visited us at home twice before I was expected to bring DD to the child’s centre for her check up. I know this was only because I was recovering from the surgeries I had but I was very grateful at the time.

I’m having my C section tomorrow for DS and I’ve honestly been thinking the same thing! If all goes well and we only have to stay in hospital for two nights (I’m being optimistic here😬), I’ve been thinking if they expect me to take DS to the GPs centre for his day 3 or 5 check up. I’ll just be happy to be home let alone out and about on the bus taking DS there.

Contact the place you’re meant to go and explain your situation. You really cannot take yourself up, down and everywhere when you can barely walk inside your own house!

LynetteScavo · 19/04/2022 09:49

This is appalling! You should not be expected to go, and no new mother should be hauling a car seat with a baby around.

Tell them you can't go.

C8H10N4O2 · 19/04/2022 09:55

@SherryPalmer

Postnatal care in the UK is a disgrace.

Not just postnatal. Over half of maternity units are below required standards based on CQC assessments.

I'm honestly shocked though that standards are so poor now that women are expected to make their way into hospital on public transport, carrying one child, dragging others at 3 days post partum. Judging by a couple of posts it sounds like this was happening pre pandemic which may be a part of the poor services reported.

mrziggycoco · 19/04/2022 11:08

No, I wouldn't have gone. I wanted to be at home with my baby. I was sleep deprived and my breasts hurt a lot. I was pumping and there is just no way I would have gone to the hospital. The midwife came to me, they wanted to prick my daughter's heel.

Tell them you can't get there. You could get a cab but again I wouldn't, it would cost too much.

elidelochanthefirst · 19/04/2022 11:41

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow

I had my last baby in 2005. Visited everyday at home by midwife for first week, then every other day 2nd week. Then HV visited

In 1993 when l had my first, GP’s routinely visited during second week.

I can't believe how quickly it's deteriorated.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 19/04/2022 17:59

It was 2006, l made a mistake.Yeah l can’t believe how it’s deteriorated either.

Original poster

Lafoosa · 25/04/2022 17:17

Luckily I managed to sort a home visit, 10 days postpartum now and we've been discharged from midwife care which is a huge relief because the care I had in pregnancy and after has been appalling all around. It was a completely different experience to my last baby which was only 2019.

I just had to tell them no, because I'd already made my bleeding way heavier just by doing the nursery run and that's a 20 minute walk, and I keep getting cold all the time so doing an hour long walk just wasn't going to happen at any point.

Got the health visitor tomorrow, but I'm probably just going to tell them I'll contact them if I need to and get them not to do loads of visits all the time. 3 babies in I don't really feel like it's a service I need, and if I did I've got their number.
Baby blues definitely kicked in by day 5, the lack of sleep is a real killer. Especially with a 2 year old that wakes up whenever baby is sleeping 😅
Can't wait to be able to handle more time on my feet because my house looks so bad right now, and I don't much like being inside all the time.

My OH has this week off work though, so I'm going to make the most of that and just nap whenever possible.

OP posts:

Carrotco · 25/04/2022 17:41

I’m realising more and more how lucky I was when I had my son 20 years back. Several Home visits might even have been daily! from the midwife until 10 days old and then Health visitor took over and was coming to my home weighing him at least weekly to start for with first months as he was struggling to gain wait. He was 3 or 4 month old before I had to take him to the clinic for weight checks. All on the NHS!

ElephantandGrasshopper · 25/04/2022 17:50

I had to do this for the newborn check when my 6 year old was born (when I had my 9 year old it was all home visits). If I had another baby I would consider declining this check (unless I had any concerns) as I don't know if its really worth taking a healthy newborn into a germ filled hospital for.

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