Home birth question

[Hikoridikori]

I just have a home birth question...

How can it be that some people opt for a home birth so that they can have a calm/natural birth despite all the risks?

I mean that the baby could be in an undiagnosed breech position, the heart rate may drop and a doctor may be needed, the mum may have blood pressure issues, excessive bleeding can follow after a bad tear that needs transfusion, the baby may need to go straight to NICU because of breathing or other issues etc.

All these mums that go for a home birth how can they not be scared about something not going by the book?

In my mind a medical sterilised environment is less scary than how scary are all the risks I mentioned above.

Please don't get me wrong, I fully respect different opinions. I just want to understand the logic behind this decision.

My health visitor told me she opted for a home birth after seeing a lot of women arriving to hospital with the baby already part of the way out or born on route.

The hospital is very close and that was one of the factors in our decision

I had 2 of my 3 at home. DC1 was born in a hospital. It was a textbook, straightforward labour and delivery, but NHS protocols meant it all felt very medicalised, which in turn made me feel like a ticking time bomb like the staff were just waiting for something to inevitably go wrong. I hated every second of it. I didn’t feel safe in the hospital. My wishes weren’t respected and informed consent was not obtained before procedures were carried out. As an abuse survivor, that really messed with my head and I came out of it quite traumatised.
I made the decision to have my next two at home. Completely hands off. I made it clear from the start that no internal examinations would be happing during labour, during birth or in the immediate aftermath, and no one was to touch me or my baby without my explicit consent - except in a dire medical emergency.
Both home births went smoothly. They were a billion times easier than my hospital birth. I’d choose home over hospital every single time if I were to have another healthy, low risk pregnancy.

It' s hard for me to get my head around the fact that people in hospital can be disrespected and therefore their humanity disregarded and yet it happens all the time. Even more bizarrely it happens disproportionately to women in labor, who have paid through their taxes for the 'care/service'

I was born at home. The GP attended and not a midwife.

I wish I had my DD at home. It would have meant a dedicated midwife. In the hospital I saw many different midwives and my DH ended up having to run into a corridor to ask for help when my baby was crowning.

They also left me an entire day puking and being in severe pain at home.

Much much much better care (undivided) than on a maternity ward and no awful having to stay in the ward afterwards. Home births the midwives flag issues much earlier to give time for transfer. I nearly did transfer, the ambulance was outside, but ad with my first birth went from stuck at 3cms to 10 in less than half an hour.

I had a planned homebirth but an actual BBA with DD, so 1:1 midwife didn't happen for me until after she was born. My midwife is doing my 'birth plan' next week which she described as "telling you what will happen". Good to see informed consent is such a priority in obstetrics

DS was technically BBA at home - paramedics arrived 10 minutes before baby did! Labour at home was great (if anything it ran a little too smoothly which is why we didn't make it to hospital) and the birth itself was fine apart from a relatively substantial tear.
I'm 17 weeks now with DC no. 2 and really indecisive about home vs hospital this time round.

My view is somewhat biased because I did have a medical emergency at my low risk first birth with no wanrning signs. But even before that I personally felt that I was safer in hospital and wouldn't have considered a home birth despite it being suggested by midwives several times as I was an 'ideal candidate'.

For me, I relaxed as soon as I got to hospital because I felt like I was with the professionals, with all the equipment and drugs in hand. Others feel very differently, Plus, I am a 45 minute drive from hospital so that's another reason I'd not have considered a HB.

If I'd have had a HB with my first, me and my baby would both be dead. Of that I have no doubt. So I would be one of those rare cases where things go really really badly wrong. They do happen. Because I was in hospital, I was able to be moved very quickly to theatre, with a team of experienced people on hand to deliver my baby. We were both left ill, and both left with a non life threatening but permanent injury each.

Needless to say, a HB was not on the table a second time around and I had a lovely calm ELCS instead. Much easier, and safer (for me!).

Everyone is different arent they. Personally I've felt bullied and my opinions overridden throughout all my 3 pregnancies and births. My first birth in hospital was traumatic due to the very substandard care provided. My miscarriage was managed terribly and without any thought to the loss I was suffering by the same hospital. I just do not like the place, I don't like the NHS way of working for maternity services. I had my second and third at home, second was a planned home birth and the third came out so quickly I couldn't have got to the hospital if I'd tried!

Local maternity clinic by me puts electronic tags on the babies... that’ll be a firm no from me. Can’t imagine being in such a “prison” type environment. Yes I understand there’s the odd risk of... babies getting snatched I suppose, but on the ball staff and the layout of the department should surely be able to deal with that (a door with a code , given to the mothers should suffice, surely?!!)

@Londondreams1

Local maternity clinic by me puts electronic tags on the babies... that’ll be a firm no from me. Can’t imagine being in such a “prison” type environment. Yes I understand there’s the odd risk of... babies getting snatched I suppose, but on the ball staff and the layout of the department should surely be able to deal with that (a door with a code , given to the mothers should suffice, surely?!!)

What the ...?!

Anyway, was going to add that u just had a homebirth with my third (my first was labour ward induction style, second was in MW led unit) and it was amazing.

I had one on one care and I knew all the MWs on the HB team. On the night, we had two plus a student (and our doula), they were completely hands off, apart from checking the HB every 15 mins and when they passed him to me. Then they left us at home in the wee small hours to get to know our wee little one. Cliché, I know but the whole thing was a dream and I would book a birth in hospital again!

It is OK to choose a different set of risks.

Many risks are increased by going to hospital.

Many risks are increased by staying at home.

Everything else being equal, there is no wrong choice, and a lot to be said for the comfort of the mother. Both because its her doing all the work and because the birth is more likely to go well if she feels safe and supported.

We used to breed kittens and small mammals at home as a child. I guess it was drummed into me to give the mothers a safe space, do not interfere. Do not touch. Do not disturb. Do not disrupt the natural process because it has big repercussions. Quiet, calm, dark, private, safe smells. Many would ignore the nice birthing places we had set up for them and choose utterly inaccessible holes where they felt safe (one memorably behind the bath)

I felt the same about giving birth myself - though I managed to resist the temptation to crawl behind the bath.

Going to hospital increases some risks.

Risks of getting there - giving birth on the side of the road is a massive risk I really wasn’t prepared to take. Having an accident because of a distracted driver. Having to involve an unknown taxi driver in my very intimate process knowing he’d go home and tell the story. Giving birth without a partner because they are doing something ridiculous like finding a parking space, topping up the meter or getting a coffee. Giving birth in the hospital car park. Not being believed and being sent home. Having to labour in public in corridors and find our way through a maze of stairs (our labour and delivery is on the fourth floor) to get any help.

Risks of having vaginal examinations and the risks associated such as rupture of membranes, infection, stalled labour. The actual labour risks are well documented, some higher in hospital some higher out of hospital. Risks of infection generally, for mother and child, especially in a pandemic.

Having to go to a postnatal ward, lack of privacy, inability to shower, bath or douche when needed, no guarantee of a private or clean bathroom, no one to watch the baby. Visiting hours. The other parent of the baby being asked to leave their hour-old infant.

I had DC2 at home. Planned. He was in an undiagnosed position that would have resulted in a CS if I'd been in hospital. But we both made it, he's 21 and 6ft now.

I certainly wasn't scared and had no worries at all. I believe that it was because I was relaxed and at home that we both came through safely.

If you agreed to induction that would not be done at home.

Like others on this thread I found home births were simply better managed - dedicated and experienced midwife throughout, second midwife through all the key stages. My home births were not all optimally positioned babies and they were all big babies but the labours were less stressful and I recovered quickly.

My first was in hospital, midwife not available most of the time, staff looking at monitors (wrongly placed) rather than listening to me, junior doctor just started on obs rotation told them to accelerate labour despite the senior doctor having earlier said the contrary and it just got worse. Ended up with baby in special care in hospital and a traumatic birth.

The key difference to me was insufficient time and attention from staff in hospital, dedicated time and support from staff at home. The midwives who looked after me at home all said they loved home births because they were the only time they felt they were really giving the level of care they should.

@PiesNotGuys I love what you said about the animals. It so true isn’t it! At the end of the day, we are just a big mammal! And when it comes to giving birth we aren’t all that different from other mammals. I know that I felt safer, better cared for, calmer and “in the zone” during my two home births than I did in hospital with my first.
I feel like community midwives are a different breed entirely to hospital midwives too.

@PiesNotGuys When I was a child I had a car, who chose to gave birth in a very dark place where no human could reach her. I found her there, tucked away out of reach with all her kittens around her. I learned a lot from her and applied it to myself. Had 2 beautiful homebirths

cat

Can the NHS really afford midwives delivering babies at home now? Choice is expensive. As usual lots of sneering at Caesarian’s and other interventions. Home births can be risky. You cannot always have what you want. I felt truly lucky to have an epidural. Not available at home I think. Home births are only available to the “natural” birth converts. I wasn’t one.

@TizerorFizz

Can the NHS really afford midwives delivering babies at home now? Choice is expensive. As usual lots of sneering at Caesarian’s and other interventions. Home births can be risky. You cannot always have what you want. I felt truly lucky to have an epidural. Not available at home I think. Home births are only available to the “natural” birth converts. I wasn’t one.

Home births are not only available to the "natural" birth converts - I was never one but your badging of home births as some kind of fruitcake fringe is pretty much par for the course amongst those sneering at anyone wanting half way decent care.

Firstly - if the NHS can't' provide a midwife to focus on a woman giving birth during her delivery then it has its priorities wrong and lack of such care in maternity units has led to some of the scandals in recent years. Few midwifery staff are happy providing substandard care.

Secondly - its always been cheaper to do home births. Hospital time and space is expensive. If that is no longer true, then its because the quality of care in hospital has been reduced to an unacceptable degree.

You wanted to give birth in hospital - fine then that is the right option for you. I've done both, don't rubbish what you know nothing about.

I had DC3 at home after almost giving birth to DC2 in the car en route to the hospital after a hair-raising high speed drive to hospital. I made a judgement with my midwife that a home birth would be lower risk for my next baby.

I had an additional scan two days before my due date to check he wasn't breach and had a very relaxing birth attended by two midwives I knew.

My local maternity unit is midwife-led so in the event on an emergency I would have had to be transferred to a bigger hospital by ambulance and could do that from home if needed. It isn't for everyone but it was a very positive experience for me.

[quote Londondreams1]@PiesNotGuys When I was a child I had a car, who chose to gave birth in a very dark place where no human could reach her. I found her there, tucked away out of reach with all her kittens around her. I learned a lot from her and applied it to myself. Had 2 beautiful homebirths[/quote]
This was my model for my homebirth. I requested that I was left alone to labour in a dark room and that was what I did. The midwives and DH only came into the room when I was very close to giving birth. I really appreciated the fact that they respected my wishes.

@lakeswimmer yes it’s hard not to believe that hospitals— which are the exact opposite of these ideal conditions— don’t cause many problems.
But I do respect the fact that many women feel comfortable in a medical setting. Not sure why that is considered so much more socially acceptable though . A desire for homebirth can even sometimes lead to social services involvement

@C8H10N4O2
“Natural” births are not fruitcake fringe. Did you know this was the label given by the RCM, until a few months ago, to women who didn’t want intervention and it was their policy to promote such births? It is not now due to higher mortality than is deemed acceptable. This is in the wake of the North Staff Inquiry into baby deaths where mothers were refused intervention by the “fruitcake” midwives. The only women who can give birth at home are those who don’t need or want intervention. It’s perfectly ok and safe in most maternity hospitals. Frightening people isn’t helpful.