Hypnobirthing to change mindsets

[jmap81]

I read lots of things on here about people's birth experiences and the trauma, bad experiences, bad memories (as well as many many positive ones). Am keen to know, as a FTM, did people have these tough experiences after doing preparation like hypnobirthing?

I’m not really sure what you mean.

I’ve seen it go both ways. Some people have a great experience with hypnobirthing and it gave them a fantastic coping strategy. Others are woefully ill equipped for labour and because they’ve been led to believe they will experience no pain at all, panic when they do, have no back up plans, need pain relief (epidural) and then feel like utter failures because of this.
There’s some really good things about hypnobirth. There’s also some utter shit!

Traumatic births are not caused by your mindset. Hypobirthing may help some people but won't stop medical emergencies.

I started reading a book about hypnobirthing when I was pregnant with DS1.

On the 2nd page, it said "now, despite my belief and experience in hypnobirthing, I chose an elective c section with my baby" and then I left the book on the tube.

Have lots of professional experience of hypnobirthing as birth experience/trauma is an area of specialist interest for me as a midwife and HV.
I think it's variable but have been involved in cases where it was felt retrospectively that it was not a thorough preparation for the reality of birth or all of the potential outcomes.

My birth went drastically wrong. Ecs. I nearly died. Dd nearly died. The hypnobirthing helped me stay calm.

I had positive birth experience think hypnobirthing really helped. It's great can't see any harm in giving it a go. I got a book& CD got so much out of it. Lot of it helped enjoy the pregnancy as well as keep calm for birth. Good luck

My hypnobirth instructor played me a video of a birth and I had a panic attack which was probably a symptom of PTSD after my previous 100% natural birth traumatic birth and other sex-related traumas.

As I struggled to watch it, she literally called me a coward, laughing. It was hard to commit to her voice after that. Ended up with an epidural which was actually quite a positive, painless experience!

It’s impossible to predict how a birth will pan out, but if you’re informed and you feel you have control over the decisions taken (I did insist on the right to make my own decisions throughout) it can feel empowering rather than traumatising, even if it’s a mile away from what you’re planning for.

My issue with hypnobirthing is that it builds you up to think that if you can remain calm and all full of oxytocin then you can control your birth experience. I’m sure that for lots of natural births that works really well (and being honest it did for me in both of mine)

But your mindset doesn’t control your babies heart rate dipping or you getting pre eclampsia, diabetes, shoulder distocia etc all things that will cause the medics around you to escalate the interventions.

If you go into thinking you can breathe and mantra your way through all of those things your going to feel like you failed.

I’ve seen so many mums feel like they weren’t calm enough and that’s why they had a C-section and it’s so patronising

Hypnobirthing helped me get to 9cm without realising how far along I was (I was being induced and on the antenatal ward at the time) however no amount of hypnobirthing could stop my 10lb baby getting stuck and having quite a traumatic delivery.

I did hypnobirthing and it definitely helped me feel more calm/positive than I otherwise would have. I did have a pretty straightforward labour but honestly I think that was just luck!

I did the Positive Birth Company’s hypnobirthing course which I found to be brilliant. The nhs antenatal classes available where I live did not give adequate information in comparison, and I think I would have been really scared about birth and had a more difficult labour/harder recovery post birth if I hadn’t done a hypnobirthing course.

I did the PBC hypnobirthing course and fully committed to practicing the techniques, took fairy lights to hospital etc. However I was under no illusion that this would make birth a magical experience and was prepared to accept pain relief and intervention if the circumstances required it. This worked for me as I wasn’t devastated to end up with an induction, understood and felt in control of what was happening at each stage of my labour, and felt able to cope with the pain the whole way through. The trauma for me came afterwards when I had tears repaired with inadequate anaesthesia. I’m now expecting number 2 and am repeating all the hypnobirthing practice, because it was very, very helpful - but it’s not a silver bullet for all birth trauma.

Good hypnobirthing courses make it clear that you may need interventions or a C-section or extra pain relief. Good ones give you the techniques to stay calm in various eventualities.

Bad courses give the impression that you can breathe your way through a painless, intervention-free birth. This is not always true.

I was lucky to have 2 very straightforward, quick births. When I had my DD (1st birth) I felt loss of control, I didn't regulate my breathing, panicked etc so I wanted to have a bit more control of my breathing etc 2nd time round.
I did the positive birth company videos (just the free ones on YouTube) and practiced the breathing techniques, listened to calming music, did the affirmations etc. My 2nd birth was very calm, I kept my breathing under control better and overall I felt better afterwards so I was glad I did the hypnobirthing in the end.
Having said that, I had very uncomplicated births and the hypnobirthing would not have had anything to do with that. I went in with the mindset of whatever is best for baby will happen (not to be upset if I needed intervention etc)
Also, it's not a magical pain relief method. It still bloody hurt, I had gas and air and the birth pool for pain. Hypnobirthing was all mindset for me.

I found the Birth Ed online course quite good, as she covers the hypnobirthing stuff, but also goes through various paths your bit to could go down such as induction, c section, etc. one of the best things I took from it was to make more than one birth plan, so you have to think about what you would prefer in case things go down a route you weren’t planning. So I had plan a that was all natural, plan b that was more medical, induction type plan and plan c was c section. I did end up with a c section and it made it so much easier that I had a plan for how I wanted that to go

Giving birth is like facing a dragon and hypnobirthing gives you a cardboard sword and shield. Minimal use but it's better than standing there with nothing. You feel mentally prepared before and it helps you through the first stages. Things went to shit from transition onwards though!

I read all the hypnobirthing books, had a "no intervention" plan, brought the massage oils and calming music... and still had an induction, epidural and EMCS because my baby wouldn't come out.
I think it's great to plan for a calm birth but you need to be prepared for things not going to plan.
Pregnant with #2 now and hoping for a hypnobirth this time! Sadly I can't have a water birth due to the previous c section though :(

I didn't do hypnobirthing as such, but before my second birth I did spend a lot of time visualising how the birth I wanted would go.

I had a beautiful second birth. Quick water birth using gas and air and no tear or complications.

BUT I think that only worked because I'd had one birth already and I knew what birth felt like and I knew that my body was capable of a vaginal birth.

I don't think it would have worked with my first birth as I just didn't know what contractions would feel like.

Also, I bled in labour so had to go to the labour ward and be monitored. Something I didn't know could happen.

@Spottybotty20

My issue with hypnobirthing is that it builds you up to think that if you can remain calm and all full of oxytocin then you can control your birth experience. I’m sure that for lots of natural births that works really well (and being honest it did for me in both of mine)

But your mindset doesn’t control your babies heart rate dipping or you getting pre eclampsia, diabetes, shoulder distocia etc all things that will cause the medics around you to escalate the interventions.

If you go into thinking you can breathe and mantra your way through all of those things your going to feel like you failed.

I’ve seen so many mums feel like they weren’t calm enough and that’s why they had a C-section and it’s so patronising

This is really not true of good responsible hypnobirthing teachers and courses. I've had experience of two different teachers and they were both very clear that you can't control what will happen, "natural" doesn't equal better and that hypnobirthing techniques can be used for any kind of birth. There was never any pretence that hypnobirthing can magic the pain away. It was simply about tools and techniques to feel calm and positive about birth, and be able to remain calm and feel confident to make choices no matter what course your birth takes. I cant stand woo woo stuff but there's nothing woo woo about the fact that feeling relaxed and having oxytocin sparked will enable your body to cope with pain better than if you are super tense and anxious. It's also really helpful in terms of the role of the birth partner and how they can help, and how to create a really nice birthing environment no matter where you are. I had an 24 hour birth with epidural, episiotomy, ventouse, haemorrhage and a baby who was whisked off for drugs straight away for fears he had an infection. Of course a lot of it was bloody horrible but I felt totally calm throughout all of it which I don't think I would have done had I not done all the hypnobirthing preparation.

There is lots of brilliant different styles of preparation. But nothing unfortunately can ensure a great labour and birth.
I did NCT and tried some Hypno birth techniques. First was back to back and had a double instrumental delivery, we were about 5 minutes from EMCS.
Second almost born onto the hospital floor, thank goodness for a quick midwife who was good at catching.
Complications can happen however much anyone prepares. But if you like the sound of the approach it helps some people feel calm :). One of the best things about NCT was my husband seeing photos of normal new born babies (wet and purple looking! And gross umbilical cords!) It helped him to know what to expect :)

Of course you can do all the preparation/hyphobirthing in the world and still end up with a traumatic delivery! There are so many other external factors that you cannot control. How is this even a question?

I did the Positive Birth Company hypnobirthing course and, after the birth, felt like it had been pretty dishonest. It makes you think you can have a lot more control over what your body - and the baby - will do in birth than you really can. In my view it gives you really unhelpful expectations. I ended up with an EMCS, having started off wanting to be in the pool breathing deeply etc etc. There's nothing wrong with learning to do deep breathing and so on, and I think that can be helpful. But I would ignore most of the rest of it.

@LuckyWithMyLot guidelines actually state women having a vbac should be supported to labour and birth in water, that’s stated in the NICE guidelines, which all hospitals in the uk should be following, if they’re not I’d be questioning why they are going against them

Here’s a link to the relevant section, it’s 1.19.7 that specifically talks about water birth

www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng121/chapter/recommendations#previous-caesarean-section