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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Why is unmedicated / "natural birth" glorified

160 replies

daffodils123 · 26/10/2021 17:44

It really baffles me the extent to which "natural births" are glorified both by pregnant women, midwives and even others when they ask if you're planning on a "natural birth".

There is no other procedure that people routinely turn down painkillers or pain relief when getting & so it always confuses me that this is even a thing.

I also have a feeling that if men could give birth, this obsession with "natural birth" may not be a thing!

Has anyone else found this to be the case??

OP posts:
WimpoleHat · 26/10/2021 17:47

I don’t understand it either. I had two epidurals and was up and about pretty much as normal both times the next day. I read somewhere that the French don’t have a term for “natural birth”, but call it “giving birth without an epidural”. I don’t know if that’s actually true, but it made me laugh!

HumunaHey · 26/10/2021 17:50

I find the opposite- people constantly telling me not to be a martyr because I didn't want epidurals with both my births. I didn't make my birth choice to be a martyr. I looked up the risks and benefits of not using epidural and made a personal decision not to have it.

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 26/10/2021 17:52

I don't understand either. I did have a 'natural birth' but it was against my wishes. I begged for medication and was given none. It was utterly hideous.

I wouldn't judge anyone on their choices. I don't think any one birth is better than another. It's personal choice.

Blahdyblahbla · 26/10/2021 17:53

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oviraptor21 · 26/10/2021 17:53

I'm with @HumunaHey . Having looked at the risks and benefits of the various options 'natural' childbirth did seem the best option for me .... along with gas and air if needed.
I definitely don't think it was glorified ... rather people tend to think I was mad.

firstimemamma · 26/10/2021 17:54

What @HumunaHey said. I had a natural birth and there does tend to be a 'why would you want to do that?' air to things?

I think epidurals can be brilliant but they do come with risks and I personally just didn't want one. Dh is medical and the amount of patients he sees who have some sort of lasting issues with their backs as a direct result of having had an epidural would surprise you.

I think each to their own and no one particular way should be glorified.

Avarua · 26/10/2021 17:54

Some sort of deep "original sin" cultural hangover probably.
I don't know for sure - not a doctor - but I think I read somewhere once that epidurals can impact your body's hormonal response making it harder to establish breastfeeding. I know Caesarian births make it harder to bf. It's all to do with the rush of hormones.

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 26/10/2021 17:55

@Blahdyblahbla

I think its an antidote to the "the baby and I both nearly died, we had the worst birth anyone has ever had" brigade, IME that seems to be more glorified than having a straight forward simple delivery.
Ffs, have you had an empathy bypass? Birth for some women genuinely nearly died end up in death, and even when it doesn't it can be incredibly traumatic.

I sincerely hope you've never expressed these views anywhere near a new mum.

AMostExcellentStick · 26/10/2021 17:56

I think it’s a bit like breast/bottle feeding. Whichever one you go for, you’ll pick up the judgement on that one and the support for the other.

user1498572889 · 26/10/2021 17:57

Firstly it doesn’t matter to me how people give birth as long as they have a lovely healthy baby at the end of it.
When in labour with my first child I had gas and air and all of the drugs I was offered probably because I had no idea what I was doing and was scared it would hurt too much. Consequently I felt awful and was sick for a couple of days afterwards. When I looked back I felt like I was completely out of control of my own body. With my following 2 children I had no pain relief at all not even gas and air as it made me feel sick. The difference after the birth was fantastic I was up and about straight away and felt great. It was nothing to do with it being a “natural” birth and more to do with me wanting to be in control of my own body and my own pain.

tiggerwhocamefortea · 26/10/2021 17:58

There is no other procedure that people routinely turn down painkillers or pain relief

Because there no other procedure that our body is designed to go through

I ended up with 2 c sections - but I think any woman going through it without pain relief is amazing 💪🏻

raspberrycordial · 26/10/2021 17:59

@user1498572889 I agree, I had pethidine with my first, horrible experience, like I was very very drunk for hours. Didn't want an epidural as didn't like the idea of a needle in my back. 2nd birth just went with gas and air and it was so much better.

WakeUpLockie · 26/10/2021 18:00

I don’t know why anyone cares either. Look at a baby, kid, adult, and you can’t tell how someone was birthed or fed. Do what works. Why the angst??!!

RachelHasThoseInBurgundy · 26/10/2021 18:00

It’s not glorified, it’s just the least risky for mother and baby.

TertiusLydgate · 26/10/2021 18:00

It was really important to me to have drug free births. I slightly resented the whole ‘you must be mad’ and ‘you’ll change your mind once it starts’ comments I got.

Apart from the husband (briefly) thinking I’m some sort of super-human and a bit of secret pride, I certainly never glorified it. However you give birth, the end result is the most important.

WakeUpLockie · 26/10/2021 18:01

I had a ‘natural’ birth - not even a puff of gas an air - forceps, tear etc, I don’t recommend! It was fast so no time for anything. It’s not a badge of honour. The spinal I had for the 1.5 hours of stitches however, I could not stop raving about 😄

Muttly · 26/10/2021 18:02

A woman’s place is in the wrong.

I had an emergency CS on my first and plenty of “to posh to push” criticism for that back in the day.

All criticism of women typically stems from some form of misogyny so it is best ignored.

Since having my first CS then Ive bottle fed, BF had more normal deliveries. Worked from home. All criticised until I learned to be a lot more coy about my choices with people.

MarshaBradyo · 26/10/2021 18:03

I preferred the drug free birth, yes painful but felt good after

I also had other ones with drugs which weren’t bad, just not above. I wanted to avoid a C section though if possible

MartyHart · 26/10/2021 18:07

I had natural births with only gas and air. I never felt I needed anything more than that and having read extensively about the pros and cons of the pain relief options I was glad I didn't need them.
If the pain had been that severe I probably would have asked for them.
It was just luck.

nurserypolitics · 26/10/2021 18:09

I did a lot of research on this. Epidurals make it more likely you'll tear. Most other drugs you can get that do anything can disrupt breast-feeding.

If there was a magical painkiller that in no way disrupted the process I would have gone for it. In the end I had an epidural, and a third degree tear. Next time I'll have a c section, so no pain at the time, but recovery pain after.

I have no hang ups about an 'ideal' birth, but after a year of physio for my tear, you better believe I would have much preferred the position of friends who did it without intervention. I couldn't, and I'm fine with that, but it wasn't without repercussions.

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 26/10/2021 18:11

@nurserypolitics

I did a lot of research on this. Epidurals make it more likely you'll tear. Most other drugs you can get that do anything can disrupt breast-feeding.

If there was a magical painkiller that in no way disrupted the process I would have gone for it. In the end I had an epidural, and a third degree tear. Next time I'll have a c section, so no pain at the time, but recovery pain after.

I have no hang ups about an 'ideal' birth, but after a year of physio for my tear, you better believe I would have much preferred the position of friends who did it without intervention. I couldn't, and I'm fine with that, but it wasn't without repercussions.

Not having an epidural doesn't mean you won't tear. You can and you get the bonus of feeling it. bitter experience
RachelHasThoseInBurgundy · 26/10/2021 18:14

Not having an epidural doesn't mean you won't tear. You can and you get the bonus of feeling it. bitter experience

That poster didn’t say not having an epidural means you won’t tear. She said Epidurals make it more likely you'll tear.

gogohm · 26/10/2021 18:15

I found my natural birth far better because I was in control, no constant monitoring etc. I also refuse sedation and pain relief for other procedures eg polyp removal and colonoscopy. I hated the feeling gas and air gave me of light headedness

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 26/10/2021 18:16

@RachelHasThoseInBurgundy

Not having an epidural doesn't mean you won't tear. You can and you get the bonus of feeling it. bitter experience

That poster didn’t say not having an epidural means you won’t tear. She said Epidurals make it more likely you'll tear.

I know what she said, she also said she'd rather be in the position of friends who had no inventions who presumably didn't tear. I'm just saying it's not a guarantee.
LanisHouseLot · 26/10/2021 18:17

I think it's part of human nature to validate your own choices by making out they are somehow better. I think it happens on both sides of the childbirth argument to be fair, but most people may end up exposed more to one side or the other based on the circles they move in. It's always shitty to make someone else feel judged on their birth choices (or not choices, we often don't get a choice!) though, even if it is human nature. Perhaps if there is a bias towards the natural birth it's because this is the only tiny chunk of human history where complicated births are still generally survivable, so being able to do it with out any pain relief or interventions is seen as admirable in a survival of the fittest sort of way?! I don't know.

Don't quite agree that you can compare it other pain medication situations though because during a striaghforward birth the pain is not an indication of anything bad going wrong. All other experiences of pain that we have are associated with disease, injury etc (at least all the ones I can think of are).