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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Please tell me how some women are up and about hours after having a baby?

128 replies

TwinklyfLightAttendant · 11/12/2007 09:29

Please could someone tell me how, as I have been wondering about this for ages now - I have never been OK enough to get out of bed within at least 12 hours really, let alone go out, do housework etc. and it makes me feel a bit inadequate, or that I must be doing something wrong, when I read other people saying they were getting on with things as usual shortly after giving birth.

My first child was an easyish birth, 8 hour labour, I reacted to the epi I think which made me sick but otherwise there was no reason I should have been feeling awful for a couple of days after. Second birth was at home, 3 hr labour, no major complications but again, felt like I'd been hit by a truck and stayed in bed for a few days. It was mainly the fact my stomach muscles felt like they have been removed, so I couldn't stand up straight iyswim?

Can anyone give me any hints for next time, or reassure me that I'm not unusual, please?

OP posts:

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amytheearwaxbanisher · 13/12/2007 22:02

evryone is different i was grand afterwards but very short easy labour and ds was only 5.3 would have been very different if i had a long labour and 10 pounderit was only a week later when my back stiffened and boobs turned to concrete that i only wanted to sit and chill all day

callmeoverchristmas · 13/12/2007 22:51

After 26 hours I was suprising OK. Was told I could go home 6 hours later but chose to stay on MWL unit for the night to give DP some sleep. I had none as DD was feeding all night. Next time I will go home to my own bed.

The next day we went for a walk in the afternoon and I felt great showing off DD to everyone we met

squatchette · 14/12/2007 03:59

With dd1 i was up and about straight away as we had to be rushed to another hospital miles away.The next day whilst she was having a 7 hour opp i went and bought a pair of size 8 jeans as i'd thought i'd stay big alot longer so no clothes with me that fit,and i ended up running for a bus.
Despite the stress i felt great physically after a horrid pregnancy that had me being sick non stop.
We finaly came home 13 months later and 4 months after that i had dd 2.
I think size plays a part as someone else said though.Mine were both tiny 4lb6 and 5lb2.

AMerryScot · 14/12/2007 07:08

It probably depends on how much pushing you had to do. All my births were very easy - no real pushing from me, so I was never really worn out right after the birth. I have always managed to potter around (which invariably led to DH being told off by the midwife).

Now four weeks later, when the broken nights finally took their toll (and all help vanished)...

YuleLoveHekateAtSolstice · 14/12/2007 07:32

I was in labour with ds1 from Wednesday (when they first began the induction process) to SATURDAY NIGHT when he was finally born. Twas a big drama, he nearly died, I nearly died, he was injured and has been left disabled.

After they'd stiched me, I got up and insisted on having a shower and trying to wander about.

ds2 was born at nearly midnight after 2 days of induction, I stayed awake all night watching him and then at 6am the next morning, I slung him under my arm and wandered off in search of coffee before insisting on going home! Friend of mine who was in the ward at the same time, but had had a cs, called me a bitch.

When I look back at both births, I realise that my body must have gone into shock, because I was kind of - disasociated, iyswim.

On both occasions - 48 hours later I was under the covers, sobbing my heart out and unable to even change a nappy without shaking and sweating!

I think something happens in some women when they give birth, maybe it's developed from when we had to do it alone and cut the cord and all that - you HAD to take care of some things at once, so your body put you into a state where you could - do you get me?

shoshaliteupthetree · 14/12/2007 07:43

The best one I ever heard was DDIL on having her third child she took DNephews to school for 9, went to hospital, had Dniece, and was waiting at the school gates for them a t 3!

I had thre very awful pgs, but thress very quick prem deliveries, longest 45 mins, I got up and went for a bath a hour after the first.

dejags · 14/12/2007 07:49

Another wakeful mummy here.

DS1 was born at 1am (12 hour labour). I went home at 9am the next morning and was walking into town a day later (the midwife was HORRIFIED).

DS2 was born at 9pm (4 hour labour). I went home the next day at 3 pm and just slotted back into life.

DD was born at 2 in the afternoon and I was up and about a few hours later. Showered and had a walk about 3 hours after she was born.

I do regret not staying in bed but it's just not in my personality to let the house get out of control. I was uncomfortable but not desparately so.

morningglory · 14/12/2007 07:58

I was walking one mile to the grocery shop the morning after DS was born, but not by choice.

In laws decided that they were going to come and visit three days after I gave birth, and MIL they are the type to not help, and expect 4 course meals with wine twice a day.

I will not be doing this again because, although I initially felt well, after a bit, I felt as if I might imminently suffer uterine prolapse. I felt this was after walking two miles for about 3 weeks. Unfortunately, I had no choice in walking around as I had no car, all shops are at least a mile away, there was poor public transport where we were living, and DS is absolutely useless around the house.

In the orient, women are supposed to stay in bed for 6 weeks after birth to prevent prolapse happening in the future. When my mum found out I was up and about immediately after birth, she was quite upset with me.

OhGiveUsAPruniPudding · 14/12/2007 08:47

I don't know why people are up and about but I wasn't!
Even the midwife said I looked like I'd been kicked very hard in the fanny. It took weeks to get better.
Anyone who feels bad about resting: don't! Think about what your body has just spent 9 months doing!

MrsDandOllie · 14/12/2007 09:36

I felt like I'd been hit by a very big truck after DS was born! Couldnt really get up for a couple of days. Fainted twice when they (twice!) made me try to get up for a shower so they move me out to the post natal ward!
Am due DS2 in 8 weeks time so am hoping it will be a little easier 2nd time round, but at least I know what to expect this time!

crayon · 14/12/2007 10:58

I think it probaby depends how big your babies are too. I was lucky enough to be up and about romping around the day after each, but then I have a large frame and tiny babies. I am sure if I was a petite slip of a thing with a 10 pounder I'd have been a mess. I also think having been the the gymn a lot pre-children probably helped with DS1.

In some ways I regret not just lying in bed with my babies for weeks though .

crayon · 14/12/2007 11:00

Oh yes, and of course quick labours help too (which I was lucky enough to have - due to the tiny babies I guess).

dividedselfridgesxmaswindow · 14/12/2007 11:03

Personally, I think if you are physically well, i.e. no big tears or heavy bleeding, etc. then it is probably down to mind over matter.

I'm stupidly good at over doing things and never went to bed after dc3 and was moving cars on my drive for the neighbours with my TENS on and then on the school run the same day. With dc2 I was in the sandpit about 3 hours after delivery, playing wih dd. Psychologically, I find it helps me but it is knackering and you do need to take it a bit easy if you can or else your bleeding can be troublesome I think.

With first baby I was in agony from a 2nd degree tear and bruising and even ate lunch in bed.

mrsshackleton · 14/12/2007 17:14

I don't think I left the house for the first week after both dds were born. But then especially after the first birth which was a scary and dramatic emergency cs I had post traumatic shock and had just had five hellish days in hospital with virtually no sleep at all, so I'm not surprised when I got home all I wanted to do between feeds was kip. I really don't get mothers who are out and about the next day, why the rush to get back to normal, once you have dcs normality totally changes anyway? Took me a long time to adjust physically and emotionally to both dcs, in fact dd2 is nearly seven months now and I still feel way below par and thinnk that'll continue until she sleeps through the night . My best friend was doing things like cycling to work the day after her dd1 was born and that made me feel beyond inadequate. But on the other hand, as another poster said, my friend couldn't bf and I've bf both of mine with no troubles, and I enjoyed both my pgs whereas a lot of people hated theirs. So it's horses for courses. Don't ever compare yourself to anyone about anything to do with dcs, we're all different and we all take different bits in our stride and find others nearly impossible.

clur79 · 14/12/2007 20:18

I was one of those who got up and about afterwards.

I have a 4th degree tear (although wasn't really aware of that at the time) and made the midwife take my catheter out ASAP (a few hours after surgery to fix me!). I wanted to pretend I was ok, and am like that all the time, so no suprise to me!

Looking back I wish I had take things easier as I was in agony for weeks, but wanted to pretend otherwise, as thought that made me weak????

I know better now....

expatinscotland · 14/12/2007 20:19

there's truth in that, divided.

'free your mind, and your ass will follow.'

ilovewashingnappies · 14/12/2007 20:23

I felt like hundreds of mums had come in and out of the ward I was in before I went home! Kept feeling like maybe I was just being a pain in the arse except midwives kept saying they were prouf of my progress.

eally appreciate the extra down time - learnt lots about feeding

walkinginaWILKIEwonderland · 15/12/2007 08:48

I couldn't walk unaided for AGES (about 10 hours) cos of the epi but even then I felt like I had been hit by a truck, my head was fuzzy and I had a headache. I also felt like the world was about to drop out of me down there for a good 5 days.

I am hoping I will feel a bit more 'with it' next time TBH.

Notyummy · 15/12/2007 09:59

In a way I am glad I was in hospital for 3 nights after having her. I was lucky in that I felt in no obligation to go anywhere...the midwives kept on saying to stay as long as I needed, and I really got loads of bf support, which I am sure contributed to me managing successfully...plus all meals brought to me and tea and cold drinks all the time by lovely orderlies! I am sure they got sick of the bint in bed 6 ringing the bell to get them to check her latch....but they never let it show!

rainbowbadger · 15/12/2007 14:16

I had a CS with my second, was walking that night and flew to Scotland for a wedding a week later - felt fine if a bit sore and was more concerned about my 'jelly belly' fitting into any of my clothes!!! :O

bletherer · 15/12/2007 20:27

I don't know why but I really wanted to be up and dressed with full make-up for visiting time (I usually don't bother with lots of make-up). It was like I needed to show myself that I was coping, and not freaking out!

My daughter was born at 6.20am, so my deadline was 2pm for visiting. Got into the shower and it was like the shower scene from Psycho (why did nobody warn me!) blood everywhere. That unsettled me a bit, but I was still determined to have the clothes and slap on.

You should see the photo taken at visiting - I look horrendous - really exhausted face and eyes with all this make-up on! It is quite funny really.

I think it was the adrenaline after the birth - I was on a high for about 3 days, up and at them, but I crashed and burned on day 4 and sat in bed all day, alternating between breastfeeding and crying. Got loads of tea and sympathy then and the midwife got my mum and husband to take the baby for a walk so I could have a bath to calm down!

I think the moral of the story it to take it easy afterwards and don't overdo it - especially not with eyeliner on those haunted post-partum eyes

serenity · 15/12/2007 20:48

I had crappy pregnancies, but pretty much sailed through my labours and so felt fine afterwards. I was out of the hospital after 4 hoursish with DS2 and DD because I found it very stressful with DS1 to stay there, and I found pottering around doing things (not anything OTT) helped stave off the 'baby blues' which I got really badly with DS1 (the one who I could stay in my pjs and relax with!)

People cope with things in different ways, and so long as you're not being pressured into doing (or not doing) things then there's no right or wrong way to act. Listen to your body.

twentypence · 15/12/2007 21:16

I happily lazed around in hospital after my 14 hour labour and waterbirth. I stayed for 3 days.

As soon as I got home I was back to walking and gardening though.

Nemostwonderfultimeoftheyear · 15/12/2007 21:20

Think it is totally luck..after I had ds I felt bad but not too horrendous so after a couple of hours was walking around..after both the girls I was showered and wanting to be moved within half an hour.
After dd1 I came out of hospital the next day and went shopping in tescos on the way home. With dd2 I was home within 6hrs and felt completely normal apart from after pains and this little newborn!!

barbamama · 16/12/2007 20:02

I think it depends on your labour. Ds1 was ok - 5.5 hours but a bit traumatic at the end and lost a lot of blood. Was up and about few hours later but felt bad for days if not weeks. Ds2 was really quick and easy labour - 1 hr 20 no complications and within a couple of hours I really didn't feel like I had just given birth or even been pregnant.

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