Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Does a midwife stay with you?

51 replies

blessings2022 · 10/10/2021 19:59

In a normal, low risk delivery in an NHS hospital where things are progressing normally, does a midwife or someone medical stay with you for the entire labour until you've safely given birth?

OP posts:
catsarebetterthandogs9 · 10/10/2021 21:35

This is really surprising.
I'm a midwife but only trained/worked in the same hospital.
Our policy is to stay in the room at all times once labour has established (4cm/regular contractions etc) or if a woman has an epidural/oxytocin etc.
If we need something we ring the bell for someone to get it, if we need a break we switch out with another midwife.
And yes, our staffing is dire so it's really tricky but we'd never leave a woman labouring alone!

Thehogfatherstolemycurry · 10/10/2021 21:38

Not ime. 3 children, all 3 midwife popped in and out till it was time to push at which point they stayed.

OopsUpsideYa · 10/10/2021 21:38

Sounds lovely.

I didn't get that even during the labour where my DS inhaled meconium.

Maybe that's why he ended up in the NICU.

OopsUpsideYa · 10/10/2021 21:39

That was to catsarebetterthandogs9

Lj8893 · 10/10/2021 21:39

At a homebirth a midwife will be with you the whole time, they may leave momentarily to take/make phone calls, go to the toilet or sit in another room to give you space.
Labour ward/birth centre should be exactly the same.

MumChats · 10/10/2021 21:42

In my experience yes once I was admitted to hospital I was assigned to a midwife and she stayed with me the whole time. When she had a break a different midwife came to cover so we were never without one.

I actually had 3 due to shift changes (long labour!). All of them were fantastic.

Flowersinthefireplace · 10/10/2021 21:43

No. I barely saw my midwife. She’d pop in every now and then and be pretty mean to me. I insisted I was ready to push and she said no. Demanded a doctor and they said 10cm and it was rushing me to the right place for delivery. Doctors called, emergency buttons. All fine but she was a cunt

SylvanasWindrunner · 10/10/2021 21:44

Ours came in and out - it was in my birth plan that I'd like DH and I to be left to labour alone whenever possible, so she came into to do monitoring and check on me and would then leave us for a while. We never got to the pushing stage though!

MumChats · 10/10/2021 21:45

@OopsUpsideYa

What do they actually do if they stay with you the whole time?

None of us will ever know.

I know. They monitor, they dab your face with a flannel, they chat to you (if you want them to), they administer drugs, they reassure your partner, they make sure your bladder is empty, that you're hydrated and if you need some quiet time they sit there quietly too. The ones I had with me worked really hard!
NeverTheHootenanny · 10/10/2021 21:46

My midwife was there the whole time. Other than a couple of times when she popped out for a few mins to use the toilet or get a cup of tea. I was induced and had an epidural so not sure if that makes a difference.

Areyouhappy · 10/10/2021 21:47

Good luck with the birth AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken; I hope everything goes well for you Flowers

BakewellGin1 · 10/10/2021 21:51

Mine was in (or very briefly someone else if she popped out) for the duration as well as visits from consultant every hour as DS was back to back and presumed stuck (he was)... From what I remember she brought me a lot of water, answered a lot of questions, calmed me down when I was scared, wrote pages and pages of notes, briefed consultant on any changes and was fantastic when I was taken to theatre and despite what seemed like a shit load of people in there (DH counted 14) she talked to me and step by step explained what was going on despite the chaos. This was my second DS and by far a very different experience to the first (I changed hospital for 2nd)

OopsUpsideYa · 10/10/2021 21:55

Sounds lovely @MumChats.

CaddieDawg · 10/10/2021 21:56

The midwife was with me pretty much constantly from when I was taken to the labour suite. It was difficult getting into hosp in the first place I found, I managed 4 days of slow labour at home before I insisted on going in on the 3rd attempt. Once in they monitored me on a ward for a bit, which was just someone popping in and out checking things. Then once in the room properly I had 3 midwives with me because of shift changes, but all were there pretty much there full time unless they needed to get something/someone for a moment. They were excellent once in properly established labour but awful for getting in or back out of the hosp, for whatever reasons!

Neolara · 10/10/2021 22:00

Not in my experience. With DD1, the midwife popped into our room twice for less than 5 mins each time until a new midwife came on shift, had a look, appeared incredibly alarmed and asked if I wanted to give birth in the bath, despite this not being allowed but I was so far gone so I might not be able to get back up the corridor to the proper room. This was despite DH increasingly desperately trying to get someone / anyone to come and see me in the two hours in between us arriving and the shift change.

All of which led to having a home birth with dc2 and dc3. I had brilliant care with dc2 with 2 midwives in attendance throughout. Dc3 arrived very quickly, and delivered by my DH before the midwife arrived.

unicornpower · 10/10/2021 22:01

Mine did! She was wonderful, got us drinks, chatted to us but didn’t impose- I was being induced though and on a drip so maybe that’s why? They did say you got solid 1 on 1 care though once you’re in labour so I felt really looked after.

Daisy4569 · 10/10/2021 22:07

I was induced, she set us up asked if we needed any drinks etc hooked me up to the monitors and the drip then left us to it. She said she could watch the monitors from their main station (and she popped back whenever the bands slipped and the monitor readings changed) and I had a buzzer thing if I needed anything.

MiddleParking · 10/10/2021 22:07

@OopsUpsideYa

What do they actually do if they stay with you the whole time?

None of us will ever know.

From what I remember mine just chatted to me. Plus did the usual midwife stuff like monitoring my contractions, explaining what was happening/going to happen etc.
Veggiepotamus · 10/10/2021 22:47

Not in my experience! They didn’t have enough rooms or midwives with my second so we were wandering round a ward, trying to convince them I was quite far along! First time round we had a room for longer but they left us too it for quite a lot, until I was ready to push

IDontDrinkTea · 10/10/2021 22:51

It’s a national standard to have 1:1 care while in active labour. So apart from popping out to get equipment / use the loo, they should be with you all the time.

Owlshouse · 10/10/2021 22:58

She popped in and out for a while during labour but once I got close to point where I would need to move to the position to start to push the midwife stayed in room from then on.

Talipesmum · 10/10/2021 23:22

My “early labour” went on for days. Contractions going from 3-5 mins apart to disappearing for 2 hours at a time. Eventually had to go in as I was exhausted and had no idea what to do, managed to get some pain relief but because I was still only up to a few cm dilated I wasn’t “in active labour” (HA!) and so probably because of this I was without a midwife for long periods of time. I had pethedine eventually and slept for the first time in days, then woke, and went from a few cm to 8cm in no time and I couldn’t get hold of a midwife anywhere and it was v scary. Especially cos spaced out on pethidene! For the second, more straightforward birth, they were definitely in and out - I was in the fancy water birth / muted lights suite, and the midwife there was not experienced with “how to use the wedge shaped cushions” and “why is there a rope hanging from the ceiling” as she hadn’t been in that centre before, so she kind of flitted in and out and left me to it a lot. Luckily I was quite a bit more confident second time round. But I don’t feel at all that I ever had anything approaching 1:1 care.

2littleboyzmum · 10/10/2021 23:44

I was high risk and they didn't stay the entire time so I doubt they'd stay for low risk, the only reason they stayed was when I was pushing. They do have other women to look after too, they've got to get notes and meds as well as have breaks. I only got 1-1 with a midwife post birth because I needed close obs due to complications and having needed surgery post birth because of said complications.

annlee3817 · 11/10/2021 22:04

She drifted in and out checking on other women in the midwife led unit, it was at the other end of the ward, so I think they were looking after the labouring mum's and then the ones on the ward too. I was only on there for 90 mins before I started pushing, then she stayed with me until DD was born

CustardGoodJamGoodMeatGood · 11/10/2021 22:10

They only checked me because I asked for them to check and they came in a 2nd time because i'd asked for pain relief as DD was pressing right on my back but was only 3cm, they came in a 3rd time a couple of hours later because i demanded DP go and find a midwife because I was ready to push, they still didn't believe me because 'first babies dont come so quick', DD proved them wrong. I was so lucky it was handover time, the next midwife I got was amazing. I'll never forgive that midwife for belittling me and feel like I couldn't read my own body.

Swipe left for the next trending thread