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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Terrified of having a c section.

32 replies

RebeccaTomalin · 18/10/2020 08:16

I found out on Wednesday that my DD was breach after being told for weeks that she's fully engaged and doing well. I had done my research and put my hopes on a natural birth. However, at 38 weeks (after having 5 consecutive high glucose shows in my urine but normal blood work) my midwife decided to send me for a growth scan to be on the safe side. That's when I found out, I was obviously a little worried especially when they said that turning might not be an option as "your stomach is very tight and it will more than likely cause distress for you and your baby". So an elective c section at 39 weeks was booked. I'm now terrified as it's in three days and I'm so worried about the recovery. Will I still be able to be there for my daughter (feed, change, hold ect). Also is the pain manageable?? I have a terrible pain fresh hold and I'm worried I'll let my DD down. Advice on the recovery process and what it will feel like will be greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading/listening to my anxious thoughts. X

OP posts:
mynameiscalypso · 18/10/2020 08:24

I can imagine it must be hard to find out at this stage, especially when you'd planned for something different. I had an ELCS last year and it was brilliant - so easy and straightforward. We got to the hospital at 7.30; by 10am, I had a baby! I never found the pain too bad at all, after a day or two it was more like a pulled muscle than anything. I had codeine in hospital for the first 24 hours but didn't need more than basic painkillers after that. I stayed in one night; the day after DS was born, I cooked dinner. The next day I went out to the supermarket. Never had an issue doing any baby stuff - just made sure we had a table to change him on rather than having to get down on the floor.

Haggisfish · 18/10/2020 08:27

Honestly I was terrified as well and it was ok. I could hold baby and feed and change done. You could ask if they have a bedside cot at hospital. The worst thing for me was pushing a supermarket trolley-you don’t realise how often you push it with your tummy! I drove after two weeks and recovered fine. And bleeding was a lot less, too.

Romanticrights · 18/10/2020 08:29

Hi, I had an elective section for the same reason, I refused them attempting to turn baby. It is scary, but I went in for 7.30 and by 9.30 I had my baby! Recovery was fine. One thing I would recommend is try your hardest to get up and about (after spinal has worn off). I'm convinced that helped me! I was able to change, cuddle, feed baby absolutely fine.

Oh, one of the worst bits for me was the car journey home, and little bump in the road is AGONY so take a pillow etc to cushion the wound! You'll be absolutely fine Smile

October2020 · 18/10/2020 08:31

Loved mine. Pain was significant but manageable with pain relief for the first 4 days (when in hospital), I took some paracetamol on day 5 and nothing since. I was careful but still able to lift her, move etc. Could def have driven way earlier than 6 weeks. I recovered much much quicker and seemed to be in much less pain than all my friends who delivered vaginally. You'll be fine!

Romanticrights · 18/10/2020 08:33

Also, on recovery, I was also walking round, going shopping etc within a week. Obviously its sore but manageable. Sitting up in bed was hard though as I kept forgetting.

I'm actually so glad that I had an ELCS and would choose a further one in any other pregnancies I may have. I've recently found out I have a heart shaped womb, so would explain why my little girl was stuck in breech position and thank god they didn't attempt to turn her!!

The actual process is actually quite calm, make sure you ask them before if you want skin to skin immediately etc so they can leave one arm out of your gown.

Good luck Thanks

BikeRunSki · 18/10/2020 08:35

I’ve had 2 c sec, although neither was elective. I understand from my friends, and being on here for years, that recovery from an elective c sec is usually pretty straightforward.

You’ll be able to be there for your baby. The advice my doctors gave my was not to lift anything heavier than my baby. The pain was fine with the first CS - I was discharged with a box of Tramadol, but didn’t take any. I went for a long (4 miles ish) walk with my baby in a sling when he was 2 weeks old, and went swimming immediately after my 6 week check from my GP. I was driving after 4 weeks.

(Recovery from my second CS wasn’t so straightforward, but neither was the second CS).

Suzi888 · 18/10/2020 08:35

I didn’t want one either, but was scared of both options! You’ll be fine, it’s sore but you’ll be able to feed, hold, and change your baby no problem. They’ll give you painkillers and make you move around any way, so you won’t be trapped in a bed. Don’t worry it’ll be okSmile.

Flamingolingo · 18/10/2020 08:39

I think that awful c sec recovery is more common in women who go into an EMCS after maybe a couple of days of labour, no sleep and with baby in distress. ELCS seems an entirely different beast. But yes I get that it’s scary, and deviating from what you planned. FWIW, plenty of vagunal deliveries have absolutely dreadful recoveries too, especially if forceps or episiotomy are involved.

AintOverUntilTheCatLadySings · 18/10/2020 08:39

My c-section (emergency after a long labour) was honestly bliss.

You get transferred to all the top doctors, the environment is controlled, and the atmosphere is quite relaxed and even jovial. The doctors chat to you throughout and you know that in 15 minutes you're going to see your baby (who is handed straight to you or your DH - depending on your birth plan).

I'm booked in for an elective c section in Jan and have heard that it's even more relaxed.

The recovery wasn't easy for the first three weeks, I'll be honest. But a lot of my struggles was starting on a back foot from the labour and my baby being tongue tied and unable to feed.

It wasn't the drug-free birth centre birth I'd planned, but was very happy with it.

Three years on, I have minimal scarring and no complications from it.

Pinkflipflop85 · 18/10/2020 08:41

The best tips i can give are...

Take your pain relief regularly. I set alarms to space mine out. If you wait until you are uncomfortable/in pain then you've left it too late.

Drink loads and loads of water.

Peppermint tea is your friend. I found the wind pain and trying to go to the toilet worse than the wound pain!

Decide if you are going to inject yourself or if your partner is willing/happy to do it.

Set up a changing station for baby downstairs.

OrangeGinLemonFanta · 18/10/2020 08:41

I only remember it being painful for the first couple of days but I was still able to lift and feed and change DS despite also having a broken leg Smile I read on MN to put a pad on the outside of your pants over the wound so if you're coughing or laughing you can apply gentle pressure to the wound and it stops you feeling like your insides are about to fall out, worked a charm.

AintOverUntilTheCatLadySings · 18/10/2020 08:43

Pain was very manageable btw.

Hot tip: buy some fantastic smelling shower gel / shampoo/ soap /whatever for that first shower after in the hospital. You'll feel so much better if you smell like a fresh meadow or a delicious cake.

You can honestly do this. You won't be letting anyone down, whatever happens

AintOverUntilTheCatLadySings · 18/10/2020 08:43

Pain was very manageable btw.

Hot tip: buy some fantastic smelling shower gel / shampoo/ soap /whatever for that first shower after in the hospital. You'll feel so much better if you smell like a fresh meadow or a delicious cake.

You can honestly do this. You won't be letting anyone down, whatever happens

MahMahMahMahCorona · 18/10/2020 08:44

I've had an EMCS followed by a surprise VBAC (ahead of an ELCS booked for 2 weeks later...) Any day of the week hands down I would have an ELCS. The team I had for my EMCS were exceptional as were the team for my VBAC, but the recovery (time and pain wise) was totally different. You'll be absolutely fine - the most worrying thing about a c-section is standing up for the first time afterwards, and having a poo. Both of which can be done with a little bit of help - just make sure you drink lots of fluids!

plixy · 18/10/2020 08:44

Just make sure you buy huge knickers. I mean huge. You will not want anything pressing on your stomach as it will hurt.
I bought one size bigger than normal but felt so bruised I had to seen my mum to Tesco for bigger ones! Apart from that recovery was fine. I went for a walk to the park after 2 days (with my husband for support).
I'm terrified of needles so didn't want a section but once the spinal was done the rest was easy.

Screwcorona · 18/10/2020 08:49

I had an emergency section 2.5yrs ago and I promise the csection was the least terrible part of my birth story.

I'm pregnant now and very happy to be planning an elective this time.

The pain is very manageable, its painful but the most of it is the first week. Get your partner to do all the lifting for the first week or two

Bmidreams · 18/10/2020 08:49

They're fine, op. I've had emcs and elcs and was fine. First 24 hours rough as houses, then fine. Say yes to all drugs. I love your pain "fresh hold". You will be fine!

Kollywobble · 18/10/2020 09:06

I had an emergency c section (severe pre eclampsia/baby in distress) and it wasn't too bad. Very well organised considering the chaos, the surgeon introduced everyone in the room, and baby was out within one minute of the first incision. I did experience some pain for the first few days and was taking Oramorph but was able to hold baby, do feeds, and nappy changes. On one particular day I couldnt put one foot in front of the other and was in agony. However, it turned out that was due entirely to trapped wind (which no one warned me about) and it was resolved after a lot of peppermint water, peppermint tea and Aeros (any excuse to eat chocolate!)

I made my DH go out and buy high waisted pants in the next size up, and big pj bottoms. You won't want anything pressing on your wound. Mine healed really quickly with minimal scarring and I was driving within a few weeks.

Good luck to you. Fingers crossed it'll all be fine.

HoldingForGeneralHugs · 18/10/2020 09:25

Also EMCS here and recovered quickly and well. Agree with what everyone has said:

All the painkillers, Oramorph is the stuff of dreams

High loose nickers and loose trousers

Drink lots after so they take the catheter out asap, i wasnt told i had to do a decent sized wee before they could take it out and had to walk around with it in a pillowcase 😂

Dont try to do too much take it easy theres no rush. I did find once i was home going out for a small walk really helped but its not for everyone!

The first shower after is interesting might sting a bit but thats normal and you get used to it, showering and drying will be slow for a while as you take it easy with your scar

Lactulose incase you become constipated (i did and no one told me that it might happen so was thrown when it did)

Ds was in neonatal so i dont have experience of being alone with him in the first few days but i was able to get him out of the cot with some assistance, also i wasnt able to establish breast feeding because we were apart but i have heard many success stories so i think it was just me.

Also if you have a moses basket it might be hard getting up and getting them out, we had to get a me to you cot because i just couldnt do it quick enough

All in all if i have another one i will be having an elective as it wasnt so bad considering, and id rather have stitches in my stomach than down below!

Ella32 · 18/10/2020 10:10

I had a planned csection 6 month ago and I wish I worried less and enjoyed the birth more. I was so worried on the day but you only worry for couple of hours and then with a blink of an eye, you are in the recovery room with your beautiful baby on your chest. Please try to enjoy it otherwise you will regret it later.
My only recommendation is to Google trap wind and how to avoid it.

RebeccaTomalin · 18/10/2020 10:12

Thank you so much. I've been stressing constantly since I found out, I'm going to try and focus on positives instead as I'm sure all this worrying isn't helping me or my little girlie. It's reassuring to hear that not everyone has had a bad experience with a C section. I was mostly terrified about not being there for her and having to watch other people do my role as mummy, but reading all your comments has helped to reassure me that it's not always the case and I can still be there for her. I'm sorry for rant but it felt so good to get it off my chest. X

OP posts:
bathorshower · 18/10/2020 10:23

I'm also a wimp with pain. Take everything offered, ask for more if you need it. Once you're home, take painkillers on a schedule, don't wait for it to hurt - I alternated paracetamol and ibuprofen. Make sure you've got lots in!

At about 5 days I walked 200m or so and regretted it. At 2 weeks I walked a mile pushing the pram, so if your DH has paternity leave, he should be at home for the worst of it.

Hope that sets your mind at rest a little.

herewegoagain25 · 18/10/2020 21:50

Hi there.

I had a very similar situation with my first. I had my second section on Monday and am now recovering well at home. I went for my first walk out today and am hardly taking any pain killers now.

Changing nappies, holding baby, picking them up all no problem. Keep up with your pain meds, even when you don't feel too bad.

Flackattack · 18/10/2020 22:07

2 weeks and you’ll be all good! Plus your perineum will be in tact Smile
They really aren’t that bad at all! Don’t over think it! Much more controllable! If you take codeine (have some lactulose so you don’t get constipated!) get the injections done first thing in the morning.
Use a towel your partners holds to get yourself out of bed!
Set up what you need up and downstairs. All easy access!
Take it easy!

dillydallydollydaydream7 · 20/10/2020 11:51

Ah OP the ladies on this thread are so lovely about it all and I agree!

I had an ELCS last year and because it was planned like another p has said, everything was so calm. DM was my partner as DH faints at the sight of blood Grin and the anaesthetist chatted to me and DM all the time, answered every single question either of us had not just about me but we were on about the NHS and the difference between ELCS and EMCS. DD was out within 20 minutes (I didn't feel there was much room so DM gave her first feed and had cuddles) then after about 40 minutes I was moved into recovery. I went into hospital for 6am, down for 7:45am, had spinal etc and DD was out by 8:26am.
Like others have said, try and get up as soon as the spinal has worn off (HCA's asked me when I wanted to try to get up and they supported me out of bed and into the chair, that was tough for the first movement) but by 8pm I was wandering backwards and forwards to the toilet etc unaided and other than the obvious pain from surgery I felt great. Just make sure you take your painkillers regularly and when they ask you to score your pain be honest because there are lots of different things they can give you.

I'm due to have another ELCS next Wednesday (which is also my 30th birthday!) with DD2 as she is small. I'll be honest I'm terrified because I'm an anxious person - I can sit here all day long though and tell everyone else how surprised I was with my first one because it really was such a positive experience, and although I'm scared again, I'm trying to remember how my first one went.

Good luck to you Smile