Was labour as bad as you expected or were you expecting it to be worse?

[bubbles519]

Just that really

Pain was a bit of a shock, the whole experience was better than I expected and a lot shorter

I was terrified of labour and convinced myself I will have a very low pain threshold and will end up in false labour/Brixton hicks for ages and go to the hospital only for them to tell me it's not even started
Horror stories from friends/family certainly didn't help.

Both my labours were very fast (4-5 hrs all in) painful yes but not much more than a very bad period (I've been physically sick when on my period before so I get them quite bad) and the thought of knowing you get a minute or few in between made me hold onto that.
In both my labours because I was expecting the worst in my life, screaming type of pain (thanks to aforementioned horror stories and TV...) I was convincing myself this isn't it yet and delaying heading to hospital. DC 1 was 5 mins away from being born in the parking lot. With DC2 DP forced me to head to the hospital sooner rather than later and the nurse couldn't believe I went from 5cm when we arrived to 10cm and pushing in about an hour.

I think because i was panicking and braced myself/was mentally prepping for the worst thing in my life it wasn't nearly as bad as I feared, and obviously I was lucky enough to have straightforward enough labours.

Awful. Thought I'd die of the pain. Only 4hrs 10mins long. Baby born 8.40, then stitches done twice, and at 10.30 I looked at the doctor and thought it would be fun if he joined me in bed.

Nowhere near what I expected. And it didn't go to plan (ended up in the labour ward not MLU) but I'd do it again in a heartbeat (5 weeks PP now).

I got cut and tore I didn't even know. I had gas & air and I was as happy as Larry. I wouldn't read in to horror stories too much and go in with an open mind.

I spent ages talking to my midwife at 7cm about an epidural "just in case", she talked me out of it and I'm so glad she did. I just wish they didn't catheterise me (they did this when I got to the hospital after my waters broke, still don't know why)

A hundred times worse than I ever expected. I'd been to classes that had taught us to breathe through the contractions. I screamed through them and then felt embarrassed because I thought there was something wrong with me for feeling so much pain. I was so shocked and had flashbacks afterwards. It was only two hours though as was my second, but I knew what to expect. Third was back to back with a low placenta and presenting the wrong part of the head. I did get and air that time though. Some people have an easy time. Others don't.

I thought it would be much ,much worse.No pain relief and a very quick labour.Have only done it once though

It was like nothing I could describe to someone else, a pain like no other. I only have 2 dc because it was agreed my 2nd would be a cesarean section.

I expected it to be horrendous at first, then done an online hypnobirthing course. Felt really confident after that it wouldn't be that bad. Ended up induced on the drip, and have to say that for me, hypnobirthing was a load of crap. 🤣 honestly I now just burst out laughing at how you're expected to just be chill and calm while you're having horrendous contractions.

If I have another im curious to see how going into labour naturally compares to induced on the drip, so I wouldn't be scared to try naturally. But no way in hell I'm going on the drip again, Id go for elective section (3 x Epidurals failed).

I'm not sure it was worse, just that I didn't know what to expect... I think I'd describe contractions like those really bad wind cramps you get that intensify and get stronger and stronger before easing off. I wasn't expecting the after pains though that I felt quite strongly with 1 of my children that I needed meds for. I equally wasn't expecting for my lady parts to look completely different afterwards thanks to episotomys and some of the stitches coming out and not fusing back together 🙄 but I didn't want a repeat of the pain from the stitches... That imo is worse than the labour pain having those fuckers done!!! I think I'm now more of an advocate of 'no need to try to brave it out, if you need pain relief, take it!!' Thank god I had pethidine for DS1 as I needed 45 mins worth of stitches and didn't feel any of those. I had just gas and air for ds2 and could not believe the pain from the stitches and I only needed a few, dread to think how that would have been needing so many without the pethidine

for me, hypnobirthing was a load of crap

Me too, @secretllama. I went into my first labour fully prepped for a hypnobirth and hoping to be able to manage the "surges"... but then I had a very long, very difficult, back-to-back labour that no amount of hypnobirthing practise could've touched. It was far more painful than I'd ever imagined - and by most measures I'm pretty hardcore The pain was so hideous that I found myself wondering if I was still alive or not, and hoping I'd die just to make it stop. It completely broke me, physically and mentally, and I was a wreck for a long time afterwards.

Then, second time around, I had a straightforward water birth with no pain relief...and then it became apparent what people meant when they said labour wasn't that bad. I mean, it was uncomfortable and all, but I've run worse marathons.

What I learned is that one labour is not the same as another, and you can't predict what you're going to get. There are fairly painless labours and there are excruciatingly awful ones. Some people are lucky, some aren't! And anyone who talks about "pain thresholds" is a dickhead...

Was much Worse than I expected. I'm a rough & tumble broken lots of bones person so thought I'd manage well. I was naive thinking I wouldn't be overwhelmed. I was very overwhelmed.

It was sort of both better and worse than I expected, if that makes sense. The pain was worse. Like a few others in this thread I'd done hypnobirthing but found that once the contractions really got going, breathing exercises alone didn't really cut it. On the other hand the pain was mostly manageable (with gas & air, a couple of hours in the birth pool, & a lot of yelling & occasionally punching things) and there was only about an hour in total when I really felt scared & out of control. It was quick too - 13 hours from induction to baby - and I did most of it at home and in the MLU, which was what I wanted. One of the things I was scared of was a really long labour (my sister's first birth went on for days) so that was a relief.

The recovery was much worse than I expected though, I had an episiotomy & forceps delivery and was really sore for 2 months.

It's weird. I had a long labour, ending in an episiotomy and ventouse. That was 2 years ago and I probably think about it every day. I'm 35 weeks pregnant now and can honestly say I'm excited about the birth.

Couldn’t have been worse. 18 hours, no pain relief and third degree tear. I couldn’t believe that was how children get into the world (it’s not always like that for everyone obviously I realise that now but in the immediate days afterwards I thought it was)
Second time round was a planned clam and lovely c section which for the record was nowhere near as painful as I feel others had described. The whole thing (including the weeks after ) were a breeze when compared to my first birth.
Only my experience but that’s what you’ve asked for !

Oh my god worse.

First time, failed induction and 3 days of screaming. Remember thinking that chopping my arm off to get it to stop would be worthwhile. Nowhere near as bad as the mental pain of baby ending up in nicu though.

Second time, start to finish was 6 hours so no time for pain relief. Less traumatic but still horrific and remember begging everyone who would listen to knock me out

Still contemplating a third though so perhaps it’s actually quite fun

I thought I was prepared for how bad it could be, but it was worst than I had imagined but in different ways. I was prepared for pain - and I largely found that manageable. But days of slow labour, almost a full day of active labour, non-stop vomiting, not being able to keep even water down, a baby wrongly positioned but missed by the midwives, three hours of pushing etc, really took its toll on me. In the end the bit that wasn’t as bad as I had imagined was having to have an instrumental delivery (and I had been worried about that).

Much worse. The pain, the duration, the actual birth, the rude midwives, projectile vomiting for hours, the utter terror. Far worse than Id imagined. Aftercare grim and unwelcoming, couldn’t wait to leave.

However would I do it all again in order to have a beautiful amazing baby at the end? Yes.

Lots down to luck and depends what other traumas you’ve been through to compare. Some people sail through it.

Not to turn this into a birth injuries thread but I think what shocked me the most was the long term issues that I (and many many other women ) now live with because of severe tearing and /or instrumental or very challenging deliveries. After the birth itself I was thrilled with my newborn and would maybe have been one of the women that just forgot with time. However the ongoing (4 years later ) pelvic floor issues that really have changed the way I live my life don’t allow me to forget! Things have gotten better but still not the same as before pushing for 3 hours !

For me, I was 19 the first time and had never seen someone give birth (except staged TV shows) so I was expecting lots of pain and blood and screaming. I was right. So technically not worse than I imagined but it was really bad. HOWEVER, the second time, I expected it to be really awful (like the first) and I couldn't have been more wrong, he practically popped out. Hardly any blood, two pushes etc. Do the second time, it was a lot easier. I do know someone with 7 kids and their 4th was by far the hardest so I think it goes to show that it doesn't necessarily get easier or harder each time and I don't think one birth has any impact on the next one, they're all so different.

The contractions were bloody awful. I was young and didn't really think about the contractions beforehand, I was more concerned about pushing a baby out of my vagina, Which turns out was the easy bit!
I felt so so proud of myself after though

It was a lot LONGER than I thought possible. Five days. Baby was in an odd position, so water didn't break on it's own despite regular contractions.

Pain-wise, it was bearable with deep breathing up until day 4 or so.

Never felt the baby coming out as I was given spinal anaesthetic due to my exhaustion/weak contractions.

First time was better than I thought, second time was so much much worse than the time before.

Birth wasn’t too bad (despite shoulder dystocia), episiotomy and haemorrhage. You go with the flow. The few days afterwards were honesty the worst. Hard to sit, shattered after the birth (dad not allowed to stay to help in hospital), cluster feeding, daily injections for the haemorrhage....but it’s all so totally worth it. We are designed to ‘forget’ the pain to some extent, otherwise we’d never have more than one!

Nothing like as bad as I was expecting at all.

Much worse than I expected. The pain was unbearable and I wanted to die just to make it stop. I also kept throwing up the whole time.

I was induced, though, and had an EMCS after 30 hours of intense labour. Might have been better had it all happened naturally.