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Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Are C Section's 'giving birth'?

67 replies

somewhereovertherainbow2 · 31/01/2020 02:25

Just interested in people's opinions on whether a C Section, planned or emergency, is considered 'giving birth'?

Bit of a backstory as not to drip feed.

I was induced with my LO, it completely failed, so I pushed for a good hour and ended up having a failed instrumental & eventually a emcs. All very traumatic & I still feel sad about it 8 months on that I was unable to push her out as she was back to back, I get a bit jealous of women who have an all natural birth that I'll possibly never experience (long standing health condition may result in being induced again if we are lucky enough to have a second baby).

I always say & think that I didn't actually give birth, I had surgery and my baby was born iyswim?

So what are your thoughts?

OP posts:
eurochick · 31/01/2020 06:14

I always say my daughter was delivered (rather than born). I don't feel like I gave birth. It was something done to me rather than something I did.

getupnow · 31/01/2020 06:15

I've had a vaginal birth and a planned CS birth. I have given birth twice.

Same here, I preferred my VB over my CS in terms of recovery, CS are not the easy option!

getupnow · 31/01/2020 06:21

In terms of your own feelings I was quite upset about having a scar & major surgery & definitely felt a bit robbed of the VB experience I was expecting. However it was definitely the right option for my child so I focused on that.

polkadotpixie · 31/01/2020 06:36

I had a c section and I joked with DH that I had DS amputated rather than him be born 😂

I wanted a c section though so I was happy when my induction failed and I had to have one, I imagine if you're disappointed you didn't have a vaginal birth it would be upsetting for you

Maybe ask for a birth debriefing?

FoxtrotSkarloey · 31/01/2020 06:40

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ.

confusedandemployed · 31/01/2020 06:41

I know what you mean OP, it's something I thought about after DD was born.

But, I carried her for 9.5 months (yes she was horribly overdue!), was blessed with the opportunity to put my body through the mangle and then laboured for 36 hours before they decided on a CS. If I didn't give birth to her, who did?

user1493413286 · 31/01/2020 06:45

The way I look at it is if I didn’t give birth then what on earth did I do.
I had an emergency section with my first and due this I will never have a natural birth (unless something goes seriously wrong before my planned section) and I’ve made peace with that. I don’t believe that pushing a baby out has anything to do with being a mum and I take a lot from the fact that my next birth will be much calmer and less traumatic.

christmasathome · 31/01/2020 06:48

I had both, first was similar to your experience op (except no use of instruments they just took me direct to theatre when consultant came to check on me).

Second was an amazingly swift vbac, I gave birth to both of my children and have never felt I hadn't. Both ways to birth a child are traumatic to the body, in fact the csection more so and too longer to recover from.

Swimslikeamole · 31/01/2020 06:49

Hi Rainbow. I had these exact same thoughts and feelings, and remember finding myself crying about it up to around eight months after the birth. I felt crushed, and that disappointment was all-consuming, and yes, I questioned whether or not I had 'given birth'.

All I can tell you is that it becomes much easier and now my child is nearly eight, the method of birth is not something I think about much, other than in gratitude and relief.

Are there good parts about your labour that you can focus on?

Be kind to yourself, and many congratulations on your baby.

WhatTheFronti · 31/01/2020 07:01

Had 2 of 3 via cesarean birth.... that's what they are reffered to by meds here in Australia. My drs and middies Only reffered to it as a birth - calling it a section diminishes it to a procedure which is wrong - you absolutely birthed a small human. I absolutely birthed all 3 of mine - just two different ways - one amazing way which enabled mine and my childrens survival!!!!!. I hold absolutely No shame or no guilt - it's just same, same but different...

RubyG3112 · 31/01/2020 07:31

I had a c-section (after hours of labour) and a few weeks later my sister had a vaginal birth, I felt like I had an easier delivery in the end, whereas my sisters sounded horrendous, but my recovery took months whereas my sisters was up and starting for feel herself after a couple of days (maybe she was lucky) so there are pros and cons to both.

I certainly don't feel like a c-section is a cop out, and would be offended if someone suggested 'it's not really like giving birth' as if it's Somehow the easy route, I mean I couldn't even sit up to hold my baby for a week afterwards! Definitely not an easy ride, in my opinion.

kmammamalto · 31/01/2020 07:33

I remember feeling like this over my first baby. It's so bloody sad that society and the way people use language can make women feel shit about the most amazing thing they do. You made it through labour, you pushed for your baby, and in the end the brilliant medical interventions we have helped you give birth in a way that meant you both survived. You should be feeling proud! I felt like I had failed when I had a ventous delivery because of how people made me feel. It took years.for me to realise it was them wrong not me.
For what it's worth, I had a home birth, in a pool with no pain relief or intervention or anything for.my second and I feel almost like I don't want to share my story because it makes other women feel bad about theirs. Where as actually it was just luck and stubbornness and having done it before was a huge factor.
I'm rambling but I want to say I really hope you find a way to feel proud of yourself. You did brilliantly and like you said ,baby is here happy and healthy!

ToTravelIsToLive · 31/01/2020 09:03

The Cambridge dictionary states the following as "birth" : thetimewhen ababyoryounganimal comes out ofitsmother'sbody:

so yes a c section is giving birth. it might not be the way humans were designed to get babies out but we're incredibly fortunate to have options and alternatives

ToTravelIsToLive · 31/01/2020 09:04

no idea why the spaces were removed Confused
the time when a baby or young animal comes out of its mother'sbody:

BackToBackTheyFaced · 31/01/2020 09:08

Yes, the baby is no longer inside you. You have birth by Caesarean section.

BackToBackTheyFaced · 31/01/2020 09:08

*gave

Wishforsnow · 31/01/2020 09:15

Of course you gave birth!

othervoicesotherrooms · 31/01/2020 09:18

If the baby is no longer inside you you have given birth!
It doesn't matter how you got it out.

wonkylegs · 31/01/2020 09:27

Yep it's giving birth
I think it's easier than it should be to get hung up on this but it's not a 'failure' to not have a vaginal delivery it's just a different way of getting to the same solution
With DS1 my waters broke so I had 4days I'd rather painful labour but ended up in a emcs and frankly I was just glad it was all over. My waters broke with DS2 but we went ahead with my planned section anyway for 2 reasons my health but also because I couldn't go through labour like that again.
Many years on and it really doesn't matter, I have two healthy boys and apart from a faint hairline scar I have no lasting damage.

Yummymummy2020 · 31/01/2020 09:28

A different experience of course but the baby came out so you most definitely gave birth. I’m sorry you had such a awful time though , and I can relate to wanting things to have been different! I had an instrumental birth too and just dodged an emergency section but it was very traumatic and you don’t leave the experience with the same happy feelings that I have been told others felt! Of course I was delighted to have my baby safe but there is a lot of trauma from that kind of birth, in my case anyway!

Ohnoherewego62 · 31/01/2020 09:28

Of course you have given birth!

I was given an episotomy after only a couple of pushes due to bad fetal distress and they wanted her out there and then but my body wouldnt comply Wink

That wouldnt be considered natural in terms of being helped along and a big cut as my body didnt want to do it, no?

I think if you go into details like that then a quite few of us haven't had natural births.

The only result to be concerned with is that you and baby are ok at the end of labour.

You gave birth for sure! Belated congratulations.

saraclara · 31/01/2020 09:29

Don't let the linguistics get you down. People are giving definitions of birth, but of course you are focusing on the 'gave' bit if gave birth. That you wanted to physically give that birth to the child by being the one who pushed her out.
I totally understand what you mean, and I think it's important to recognise what you're saying. That somehow the doctor else gave the gift of birth and not you?

You know, logically, that giving the doctor permission to deliver her safely was as much of a gift to your baby as doing it yourself. Your child arrived in this world safely because you cared for it in the womb, and you placed your trust in those who could bring your baby out safely. You gave that gift to him/her.

saraclara · 31/01/2020 09:30

(I don't know where "else" came from,'or what I intended that word to be!)

MummyofTw0 · 31/01/2020 09:35

Does it really matter?

IamMoana · 31/01/2020 09:36

I'll never forget reading on here one that a poster said a c section wasn't giving birth, it was having your baby surgically removed from you 😢 some people are just plain cruel in their views. We are all mothers, regardless of how they came into the world 💕

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